Friday, July 16, 2010

I Need A Cold Shower

Ok, so if you don't want to hear the most ridiculous, selfish, ungrateful rant then just step away from The Dandy today and have a great weekend.

It's ok, really. If you don't want to hear me sound like the spoiled, self centered, ungrateful little hog that I am, then please navigate to another page. Because what I have to say today just may ruin my saintly streak...(which is a joke because anyone who spends anytime over here knows that I am no saint)

Well, they did it. They managed to get me. Yup they did! They are throwing me a shower tomorrow and I'm pissed. I guess it was supposed to be a surprise, but they had to tell me because I was scheduled to work and I had appointments for make-up applications, which I had to re-schedule. Now I know what you are wonderful! And bridal showers are a wonderful thing.....for a blushing, new bride. WHICH I AM CLEARLY NOT!

Listen, I have been to this particular rodeo before and I am not 23 years old....double that...almost, but not quite, and you have me, older than dirt bride. So here's the thing: I told EVERYONE many months ago when we got engaged, shower. It's really the only thing I requested. I told my family and friends that at my age I do not need anything.....pots, pans, sheets, etc...I'm all set and I already went down the "shower" road the first time. I told them I would much rather have a fun evening out with my girlfriends. I thought I made myself clear.

Evidently not.

Now I have to ooooh and aaaah and open the wonderful gifts that my guests spent their hard earned money on, to honor my committment to my wonderful man, and, I'm sorry, but it's all so unnecessary.(God forgive me)

I didn't want this.

I would have rather bought them all gifts...and for that matter, screw the gifts because that is not what this is about. I'm freaking 4o something years old, and I have been running my household for quite sometime now, I need for nothing except for my "peeps" to join in the celebration.

I know, I'm awful.

And in a way, I'm embarrassed. I'm too old for this crap.

And I asked you NOT to do this.

Please, just come and celebrate. I'm not into the celebration being a financial committment for anyone. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have a family and friends that are willing to go out of their way to celebrate this joyous occasion, and I love them for it.

I really do.

But a shower??? No, please, couldn't we have done it in another way?

I can't stand myself for feeling this way, but I can't help it.

SO what do I do?

Suck it up and put on my best Academy Award performance? When I think about all the money and effort that has UNNECESSARILY gone into tomorrow, I feel like I owe it to everyone to shut up and put up, and how awful that sounds.....How lucky am I? What an ungrateful little hog.

I suck on so many levels.

So, don't tell anyone my secret. I have the best, most loving family and friends on the planet. I'm about to marry the most wonderful guy and I have been blessed in so many ways. My inner circle care only abut my happiness and they want to mark the occasion with the showering of's tradition.

I get it.

Even if I don't want it. I'm grateful that they love me enough to want to make me feel special.

Even if they don't listen to a Goddam word I say anyway.


Doc said...

I understand exactly how you feel but friends just want to do these things for you sometimes... Maybe you can just try to grin and bear it?

RW said...

Nobody ever listens to me either. I'm that way about birthdays. They're for kids to enjoy, I'll just take dinner and be happy, you don't have to give me gifts.

But then i think about people who don't have anyone to buy them a gift, about kids who don't even get regular birthday parties, and about the feeling my family is having when they plot and plan and try to pick something out for me and I have to feel lucky.

When I look at it that way I just do whatever they want to do, because it could be taken away in an instant, or if I was born one block over I may not have ever had it.

Heff said...

I feel your pain. NO ONE likes to be celebrated over !

Gifts, for ME ?.....DAMMIT !!!

"Step away from The Dandy", LMAO !!!

B.E. Earl said...

I'm with ya. I hate the celebration of me when I specifically tell people not to. Happened with my 40th birthday. I wanted to kill. But it was a good memory afterward. Just while it was happening....I wanted to murder someone.

wigsf said...

Seeings as how I have testicles, a bridal shower is something I have little knowledge about. I guess, when the groom arrives in the gorilla costume and hands you some bananas, just take them and say thank you.
Free food, free gifts, some cash is always nice. Gotta pay for that wedding somehow. Besides, it's nice to start that new marriage with a new toaster oven and some new dishes. It gives you an excuse to throw your old crap away too.

sybil law said...

I say just suck it up and drink a lot.
That's what I would do, anyway. I hate showers and all that stuff, too, but it's already planned, and you might have a great time, anyway!

Mrs. Hall said...

ok look.

you've got two options here, continue with attitude. the frowny face attitude displayed in yon post. this will cloud the day and the memories with frown face thoughts and vibes.



enter into this with an open mind, with open arms and seek wonder and enjoyment in the day.

because you are loved girlfriend. and you are loved by people who love to see you happy. and they, most likely, love the gentlemen you love.

SO by all means,

get buzzed on the champange, open the shiny gifts, enjoy the cake, and above all enjoy the people around you who love you.

because that's pretty effing special and always deserves a party.

ok, that's it for me. enuff bossing!


SkylersDad said...

With a sufficient amount of booze, anything can be fun!

Anonymous said...

I totally get where you're coming from! I would probably feel the same way if I'd requested something and it wasn't obeyed. But I think really, that they did it for you because they thought it would be nice and because maybe they felt that it wouldn't be right not to or that maybe you'd think they didn't care if they didn't despite your request. It's like that old "I don't want anything for my birthday" thing where someone says it but then is secretly disappointed when they don't get anything. :)

Just try to enjoy the spirit of it even though you're wishing they didn't.

Slyde said...

suck it up, is my advice...

i told my wife i didnt want a 40th surprise party, and thats exactly what she did. I found out about it a week before and i didnt let on, and i put my game face on.

they're doing it because they care.... just grin and bear it

Scope said...

We went thru the same thing when registering for stuff. "We have two full houses, going into one, we don't NEED anything, and I probably make twice as much as most of them, so getting gifts seems a bit (CATHOLIC GUILT) *SHAMEFUL*"

But then, I got more into the frame of mind that while it was "FOR ME/US" it wasn't strictly "ABOUT ME/US" it was also a way for the people important to us to aknowledge what WE/US meant to them.

Plus, I decided that I kinda could use some nice sheets. ;-)

Joanie M said...

I guess you're just going to have to suck it up and try to have a good time.

If I ever get married again, I think I'm going to just go and get married and not tell anyone until it's a done deal. Besides, if John's family gets invited to yet ANOTHER one of his weddings, they just might shoot him!

Furtheron said...

I know how you feel in some ways - I wanted to slope off from my job no big do... but they wanted in the end I realized it was for them not for me anyway... and afterwards I was very grateful for it. Hope you enjoyed it...