Media Junkie

L

I'm slightly obsessive compulsive at times. Like most people, I am attached at the hip to my mobile device and have been chastised by My Guy, My Kids and my mom about tuning out while zoning out on my cell. A self admitted news junkie, after completing my latest update on my operating system I was pleased to find a new "News" ap that I did not have before. After close inspection I have decided that this is the greatest thing ever! A news ap that I can tailor to all my favorite news feeds! Who knew? I certainly didn't and now that I have this beauty at the touch of my finger tip I'm unstoppable. 

CNN, Huff Post, Fox News, Buzz Feed, The New York Times, ESPN and many, many more. All just for me and whenever I want. This doesn't sound like a problem, does it? But it is. The problem is that I find that I am no longer alone with my thoughts as frequently as I should be. If I find myself with a spare moment, I am at my newsfeed scrolling voraciously for anything that sparks my interest. Good for everyday news but bad for the brain which doesn't leave much time to decompress. Yet I can't stop scrolling. Obsessive? Maybe. Or possibly I'm just someone who craves knowledge. 

Take for example yesterday's NFL games. I am competing in a football pool with 19 other people for money. Since the pool has started I have consistently been in the top ten, but yesterday? I really stepped it up. After a 2.5 hour session yesterday morning, researching and carefully making my picks, I submitted my choices a few hours before the deadline. Not feeling very confident, I decided NOT to obsess over the stupid pool and go about my business. I thought a workout would be just the thing to get my mind off football and I began my workout-mobile device in hand. It is my music device after all, so it had to be with me. It wasn't long before the ESPN ap was front and center with the live game day feed right in front of my face. There I was, working out, listening to my playlist, watching 2 games on my phone. Of course that continued for the rest of the day while I had the TV, NFL Red Zone and my IPad and IPhone all live to the games I had chosen. Seriously, I never missed a down on any of the games and My Guy joked that he has created a monster. He just may be right. 

When I'm working it's not an issue, and when I'm chilling out-the TV is my best friend, but you can bet during commercial breaks the phone is in my hand and engaging my attention.  I know how to relax and I know when it's time to put the phone down, but the lure of the information that I may be missing is sometimes too much. Am I hopeless? I'm not sure, but yesterday certainly didn't help me to come to that decision. I went 5-0 on all my football pics and am currently in 3rd place in the pool. Doesn't look like I will be unplugging any time soon. 

Witty Wednesday

This is me in a million years......well, maybe not a million.

Throwing In The Towel

Ok, so here's something I bet you never really thought about. I know I never did until it was time...

The Back Story:
I moved into the house I currently live in about 11 years ago. When you move into a new house, the operative word being NEW, you buy  lots of NEW things for the NEW house. NEW towels for my bathroom being one of them. Flash forward ten years later: said NEW towels are no longer NEW, in fact they are looking pretty tired and OLD. Throughout the years they became less soft, stained with bleach stains, and here's the straw that broke the camel's back, they shrunk. I know they shrunk because you see that decorative band on the towels pictured above? It is now shrunken tight so that my towels look like they have ruffles on either ends. Accordion pleats on bathroom towels?  Not good, or good looking. It was then that I knew it was time.

I guess 10 years is a pretty good life span for a towel, but they were becoming an embarrassment, to me especially. So what to do and where to buy? Should I go to an off price store like TJMaxx, be a Maxxionista and buy a cheaper brand? Or should I go to a fine department store and invest in a better quality cotton that supposedly will last a lifetime.

Guess what I did?

Invest being the operative word here, because we got suckered into the "better" brand. Good news is, I LOVE my new towels. They are plush and gorgeous and they all match and when I reach for a new towel  form the neatly folded pile in my linen closet, it makes me smile. We got matching hand towels and face cloths (does anybody really use these any more?) and I'm ready to start enjoying them for the next twenty years. Bad news is they cost around $500.00.

Are we crazy or smart? I'll let you know in ten years.

While I pondered the question in my head, what came to mind immediately was this:with all the problems in the world; starvation, global economics, devastation and plague, am I really wasting my energy worrying about my bathroom towels and how much I paid for them and how long they will last.? I'd be better served to just shut the old pie hole.

I'm going to thank God for making my life simple. On this topic, I'm throwing in the proverbial towel.

Who Does That?

Ok, so this is me today.

This was supposed to be a different post.
I was supposed to be giving you a quick blip about how I'm going to NYC today and will not be returning to the bloggersphere until Wednesday, August 8, 2012.

BUT, I missed my bus.

You see, I was supposed to leave at 6:30 and I didn't calculate in the travel time, with traffic, for exactly how long it would take me to get to the bus stop. So when I pulled up this morning at 6:33am and saw my big bus leaving, driving right by me, it didn't feel good.

Who does that? I'm not 5 years old anymore, and it probably cost me more $$$. What a moron I am.

Anyway, I'm leaving on the 9:30 and you can be DAMN sure I will be there at 9am sharp!! SO I lost 3 hours, but I'm not going to beat myself up over it. I'll still get there and get what I need to get done and this will all be soon forgotten. I hope.

Shit happens. But usually only to me.

See you Wednesday bloggers and for God's sake, don't be like me. Be on time....

Special Is As Special Does

I had the WORST day yesterday. I mean the worst.

It started out bad and got worse as the day progressed. It wasn't just one thing but a culmination of a lot of things and I was quietly, secretly trying to hold it together. Then, the biggest hit of all came and it was like a tidal wave of bad about the one thing that you can get me with 10 out of 10 times. My kids. And this time it wasn't just one, it was both.

As you know, we have been in celebratory mode around here with Frick graduating and all, and it all culminates this weekend with a big, blow out, $$oiree for her on Saturday. It's the party she never had, but I think she deserves and I made sure to "order it up from the caterer" (this will make sense in a minute) Then the blow came and it left me sick to my stomach.

I'm still in limbo over my feelings, and as I sit here today and wait for the rental company (that there is no turning back on), to come and set up the massive tent, tables, chairs and dance floor, I have to ask myself, "What the hell are you doing?". Then like a little grace from God, just when I had asked for it and needed it, it came to me in my morning paper. It's not really the answer, because there is no answer, but it's a statement. A mission statement to all those parents who are feeling like I am right now.

A local English teacher addressed the students at commencement last weekend and his speech entitled, "You're  Not Special" put it into perspective for me. He said what needed to be said to all of us parents and students and overachievers who think our shit doesn't stink. Boy are we wrong.

Basically it was a much needed bitch slap to all of us who get caught up in the race for perfection.

"You are not special. You are not exceptional.

Contrary to what your u9 soccer trophy suggests, your glowing seventh grade report card, despite every assurance of a certain corpulent purple dinosaur, that nice Mister Rogers and your batty Aunt Sylvia, no matter how often your maternal caped crusader has swooped in to save you... you’re nothing special."

Was my cape really that obvious?

What the heck? It was like this guy was talking directly to me and his words were never truer. He did what needed to be done and he told it like it needs to be told. As a parent in the community, an educator and mentor, he gave it to them straight, just like the real world undoubtedly will. 

"Yes, you’ve been pampered, cosseted, doted upon, helmeted, bubble-wrapped. Yes, capable adults with other things to do have held you, kissed you, fed you, wiped your mouth, wiped your bottom, trained you, taught you, tutored you, coached you, listened to you, counseled you, encouraged you, consoled you and encouraged you again. You’ve been nudged, cajoled, wheedled and implored. You’ve been feted and fawned over and called sweetie pie. Yes, you have. And, certainly, we’ve been to your games, your plays, your recitals, your science fairs. Absolutely, smiles ignite when you walk into a room, and hundreds gasp with delight at your every tweet. Why, maybe you’ve even had your picture in the Townsman! And now you’ve conquered high school... and, indisputably, here we all have gathered for you, the pride and joy of this fine community, the first to emerge from that magnificent new building...

But do not get the idea you’re anything special. Because you’re not."

Guilty as charged and justly so, because we may have taught our over scheduled, over achieving children that it's more about the medal and less about the race. He then goes on to encourage the graduates to pursue a more fulfilling life, one that puts the focus on hard work and achieving. Because Frack's three week trip to Uganda this summer NEEDS to be about the children they are helping and the school they are building, not the resume he is building. The irony is not lost on me. 


“The fulfilling life, the distinctive life, the relevant life, is an achievement, not something that will fall into your lap because you’re a nice person or mommy ordered it from the caterer.”


Amen to that. Because I will certainly remember it this Saturday as I'm cutting the check to the caterer. 

The Embarassing Truth

It happens to all of us.
It even happens to celebrities.

We are not perfect, we all fall.

This is a very recent picture of the glam Salma Hayek, when she fell leaving a building with her daughter. It happened to me very recently, also and like Salma, it happened somewhat publicly.

Long story short, I was a a memorial service for a dear friend's family member. My dear friend came to me in the church after the touching service for a hug and as I rose to embrace her, my leg got caught awkwardly and I fell backward not so gracefully. I think I saw a few people chuckling.

It makes us human and it makes us vulnerable, and it keeps us in check.

We are not perfect, Lord knows that's the truth.

Fashion Frenzy

I am a nut.

Many of you who have been hanging around The Daily Dandy for long enough know this to be fact. You also know that I am a fashion nut. Fashion speaks to my soul, and nothing makes me feel better than the feel of fine fashions against my skin.

But today I am a SMART nut.

Today I made some mean fashion decisions and hit the mother load.

Italian designer, Missoni, (my most very favorite designer) hit Target stores across the country today with low price, fabulous signature zig zag goods designed for the masses. I have been counting the days till this fasionista's dream came true ever since I saw the ad on TV a week ago.

"Shut UP," I found myself saying out loud to no one in particular when I saw it.

Missoni and low price are two words you would almost never see in a sentence together, so imagine my excitement when I learned of this offering. I had my strategy all planned out too. I was going to go right at 8am when the store opened, and I even called last night to confirm the sale. Myself and 10 other women stool outside the huge store this morning, ready to enter. Piece of cake, I thought, this is going to be easy.

You never saw 10 women turn on each other quicker in your life.

It was a fricken free for all. The section where the inexpensive Missoni fashions hung was small, but those 10 women weren't fooling around. Most were grabbing hangers of clothes, 4 and 5 at a time and stuffing them into their carts. I some how managed to grab 3 dresses, a jacket and a skirt for Frick and move on quick. I knew there were shoes.

I got to the shoes just as one woman had about 15 boxes in front of her and she defensively hovered over the boxes. I grabbed my size in the two pairs that I wanted and was herded out of that section by the masses that had moved on from the clothing. Steering my cart over to the housewares section with the intensity of a Brinks truck driver, I then scored some of my favorite items on my menu. I got a two tired appetizer tray, a set of three nesting bowls, two mugs, a candle tray, a serving platter and two bath towels. I almost didn't even know what I was doing. Almost.

The looks on the other shoppers faces as we navigated throughout the store was priceless. I caught a section for men's ties. I had to buy My Guy something. I scored a cute winter scarf, I grabbed a multi colored throw for the house and I found the perfect duvet and shams for my guest room. I was delirious with adrenaline, and I knew I was done. At the check out line the woman in front of me telling me her shopping cart story, was almost pathetic.

"That lady rammed into me with her shopping cart, ON PURPOSE."

I was almost embarrassed to have been a part of it. Almost.

It was exactly 8:34 am when I started my car and pulled out for my departure with the treasures. Thirty four minutes from start to finish. I'm not even going there with how much I spent, but I can tell you that the most expensive item was $79.99.

And I'm a smart shopper who, today, is in zig-zag heaven.

And So It Begins...

So, as most of you already know, Frick is going to be a senior when school starts next week. A joyous time in one's resume of life. Or so it should be, but what we are learning fast is that the next few moths will be from hell.

You see, Frick has to start the college application process and it ain't going to be a cake walk. Now a days the process is so arduous and long that it has left us both feeling like Mr. Blutarsky up there. There is so much to this whole college thing and then Frick's circumstances become even more time consuming because she is applying to be a theater major. That means that not only does she have to apply to each school, she also has to audition for each school.

Can you say Valium?

If that's not bad enough, there are the standardized tests. For you laymen, that is what is commonly known as the SAT and now-a-days the ACT. You can send either one score or the other, possibly both, or your best score of the two. Then there's the tutors. Frick is now on her second round of SAT tutoring, because the first round, (which cost over 2 GRAND) didn't go so well. Highway robbery. Of course there's a separate tutor for the ACT test and a college coach to aid you with the application process. This all spells out $$MONEY$$ and we aren't even talking tuition yet.

But I want to give my daughter every opportunity to achieve her dreams, and if I can do so then I consider it my responsibility. I worry that both her and my expectations are high and that disappointment could follow. Lucky for us, we are both optimistic and capable and whatever will be, will be. It will not be from lack of effort. You see Frick is an excellent student with an excellent work ethic and I would not be putting all of us through this if she wasn't the type of kid that will do well and be able to handle it.

So yeah, I'm working today to help my baby girl get everything she need to BEGIN the process, and yeah, I took the day off.

Is it five o'clock yet? I've got a glass of wine with my name written all over it.

The Bag Lady

I have a serious affinity for expensive handbags. Always have, even as a little girl, and probably always will. Hello, my name is Candy and I am a bag addict.

It all started innocently enough.

A customer walked into the store carrying the bag above. It's called the Birkin and a company named Hermes makes it. That bag above is the Holy Grail of handbags. Books have been written about, wars have been battled over it and there used to be a years long waiting list for it, if you had the Benjamin's to lay down. No one said a word about the bag to the woman, but we all noticed it. After the woman left, we started talking about the Birkin. With a price tag of $10,000.00 to $150,000.00, it is a RIDICULOUSLY expensive status symbol.

We began Googling the bag to find the price and all these sites came up offering the Birkin at discount. $250.00 for a Birkin and three days to ship? Surely these bags couldn't be authentic. I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, you know. But they all looked so beautiful and the desire to own one overtook me.

I called Hermes in New York to get a price and was told by an employee, "We cannot discuss the Birkin AT ALL over the phone, but you can come to the store and we will be more than happy to help you." When I asked the employee to repeat what he said, he said that Hermes prohibits talking about the Birkin anywhere other than in the store. My reply, "Have I asked you about something illegal?" My call to the Boston store produced the same response.

Holy contraband. It was then that I got lost in my iPad, pouring over websites with delectable pictures of Birkins in every size and color. But interestingly enough, the official Hermes web site does not have the Birkin on it at all. I checked eBay, and the forty million other sites, which are all bootleg knockoffs and began thinking I could break my rule about fakes, if the fake was of quality. But how could I really know, and why was I so intoxicated by obtaining even a cheap imitation?

I had to put the iPad down and walk away after an hour of researching return policies on these web sites and reasoning that $250.00 or $350.00 wouldn't be a lot to risk for the hope that I could possibly own a good fake. Even if in reality I knew that this probably wouldn't be the case. And here I am today, still thinking about it; even writing about it, but the urge to buy has released itself from me.

I think I'll go visit one soon at the Hermes store in Boston, but I'm afraid it will just feed into my addiction even more. Look what happened to me when I was in it's presence for 5 minutes.

My name is Candy and I am a bag addict.

A Fedora Fashion Experiment

It wasn't that long ago, 50 or 60 years, that hats were a staple of American fashion. Both men and women wore hats when they went out. Everywhere. Today, these same hats are considered a fashion risk or more of a "look at me" call for attention that possibly only Hollywood hipsters and stylists could pull off. Not so much for your average Joe.

The fedora is a new trend that seems to be putting hats back on the fashion map. I bought a fedora for myself last October, but never wore it. Or should I say I never had the fashion nads to wear it, until yesterday when I instituted a Fedora Fashion Experiment. (and trust me when I tell you, I have a lot of fashion nads)

I work in a fashion environment, perfect for my initial entry into a fashion realm of the unknown. The question? Could I pull it off for an entire day? One thing I knew for sure was if I wore it I would have to be committed and wear it for the entire day. No exceptions.

So this is me in The Candy Bar in the morning, hopeful and ready to conquer the day. Walking into the boutique my co-workers immediately greeted me with a "oh wow, don't you look cute?". I can report that at his point I felt a little silly and a bit out of my comfort zone, but I trudged on. With the weather a bit muggy and the temp inside the boutique at a balmy 80 degrees, my head began to sweat a bit and the nagging feeling of hat removal nipped at my psyche.

I was not to be deterred.

As the day progressed, I began to get my hat mojo on and I was feeling pretty good. Customers had only positive comments like:

"You look great in hats"

"I love this look" and

"Only you could pull that off."

By two pm I began to get a slight headache and I wondered if it was from wearing a foreign object on my head for so long or the fact that I had yet to eat my lunch, (which very well could have been) but after lunch I still had my groove. And it reflected in my enthusiasm.

Bottom line: The Fedora Fashion Experiment was a success! So much so, that I've decided to add the Fedora to my fashion repitoire regularly. I high recommend it to you and to all us Average Joe's who are afraid to let their Fashion Freak Flag fly.

Sometimes a little "look at me" is just that, in the most positive way possible.

What An Ass

Hey Bloggers! It's Friday and you know what that means?



It's time for those Wal Mart Crazees to REAR their ugly heads. HA! That was a play on words because a quick check of the peopleofwalmart.com site reveals that these crazys have no CRACK in the facade of life.



They know that it pays to act like an ASS.

OK, so this guy is not showing his posterior, but he is displaying a keen fashion sense. I applaud him on the skirt with those FAB shoes. I think he's kinda cute.

This is just wrong on so many levels and you gotta love how she strategically has her t-shirt rolled over the top of her whimsical, red polka dot thong. Ah the mystery...

The fanny pack is aptly named here, as this is one FANNY that is surely packing.

Really? Put back the beef jerky and grab yourself a pair of pants that fit, dude. Cmon, this guy's suspenders could be sued for non support.

You know that dog is thinking, "Oh my God, get me outta here before I die of embarrassment."

Ummm...not quite sure what to say about this one. Discuss amongst yourselves.

Isn't this every one's attire whilst out running a few errands?

And my personal favorite:

The thing here is that the poor lady may or may not have known that someone was taking a picture. But no underwear? For real? I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and guess that her thong is lost somewhere in that great divide.

Happy weekend bloggers! Whatever you do, try not to go out and make an ASS of yourself. OK?

iPad Mania

I'd like to introduce you to my new best friend.

I got an iPad for Christmas and I seem to be taking it with me wherever I go. Me and my new iPad, we're just like peas and carrots. Having just traveled by plane on my tiny little adventure, I noticed that the iPad seemed to be every one's new best friend as almost 1 out of 3 people sitting and waiting for flight delays, had on their laps, a brandy new, sparkling iPad.

Seriously, 1 out of 3 people were in possession of the iPad. What does this say about Apple's dominance in the personal computer industry? And what happens to all those brandy new iPads when Apple upgrades to a new and improved model in the next 3-6 months? Talk about market saturation.

So here's the question: Has the iPad replaced the lap top as the lap device of choice? I, like everyone else, was fascinated when Apple launched the iPad back in April 2010. I even bought one for My Guy, on pre-order, because I figured as a gadget guy, this was one gadget he just had to have. My Guy was not so impressed when he heard the news that the iPad had been purchased for him and would be arriving in the next few months. "I'm not an Apple guy," he told me.

Boy was he wrong, because he even hinted when it came time for the iPad to arrive that he was slightly excited. So it came, and we all played with it, and checked our emails in the kitchen and family room, and used it for our ongoing Google battles (another story), but that was about it for the iPad. It became the kitchen computer for easy and quick access. About a month or two ago, My Guy bought this thing called Apple TV and his whole technological life changed. Using his iPad as a remote, My Guy now has so much information at his fingertips, that we joke that he has taken to carrying his iPad around the house like his blankie.

With Apple TV we can access all of My Guy's extensive music library, movies, TV Shows and even download them onto the iPad for enjoyment when we travel. These days he is never without his iPad, even at his side at his desk at work. He has become a fan. I find myself marveling at the ease and access I now have with my own iPad.

Do we really need to be a two iPad family? The answer is no, of course not. But I can say without reservation that the purchase of my iPad was not in vain as I use the iPad for what it is best intended to be used for.

Shopping.

The Queen Of Quandary

I am the Queen of Quandary. Somehow, someway, I usually find myself backed into a difficult situation that I have no idea how to get out of. How did I get myself there? I usually try to make every one happy, which by now I should know, never works and usually ends up in a shi* storm.

I entered into that shi* storm today and here I am trying my best to climb out of it. What do you do when you try to fit a square peg into a round hole?? The quandary here, is that I offered a job to someone, who out of loyalty, squeezed me into their busy schedule. Then, just before the job was about to begin, I found someone who had no schedule constraints. Now what do I do???

I know that the original person was actually squeezing me in out of loyalty, and that the other person is perfect for the job and has no schedule conflicts. Here's where I FAIL as a person and an employer. I don't want to rumple any feathers, yet I don't need both people. Somebody has to go, and I feel terrible.

Long story short, I left it up to both players to figure it out, like a coward would do, and now I have a bigger shi* storm than when I started, and too many people to do a one man job. What the HELL is wrong with me? I've now got to fix this problem I created.

SO bloggers, you think you got the answer? What would you do?

Flatulence Is Funny

Just so you think I am not a complete crackpot, I'm going to explain my entire thought process this morning. I was originally going to blog about this commercial that I saw last night that made me chuckle. The commercial was about some giant in a supermarket, so I go to YouTube and search with the key words: Funny commercial, giant, supermarket.

Somehow, this commercial came up under the heading, "Funniest Commercial Ever". Of course I clicked on it.

I actually had to watch it a few times because I was laughing so hard I missed some of the best dialogue.

I apologize for my sophomoric mentality, but this one really made me laugh. I love it when that happens....

Yup, I Got Sucka'ed

What a moron.

I should have known better.

I even told my kids that 9 out of ten times you get sucka'ed when you buy something on eBay.

Listen to my own advice? Why, that would be too easy.

So it happened to me just like I predicted it would. I bought a dress on eBay for $207.00 and I got completely bamboozled. If the fact that the dress was too small for my waif-y daughter Frack wasn't enough to make me want to hurl, now the seller is not responding to my requests to return the item. AND that particular seller has no items for sale at this time.

How interesting.

So what's a girl to do?? This morning I sent out another message to the seller to request a return, but I fear it may be too late, considering the buyer must return the dress to the seller within 7 days of purchase. The buyer must also contact the seller to request a return, but here's the kicker, it takes 3 to 4 business days for the seller to return a response. Day 6 and still no response. Something tells me I will get no response at all.

Should I write a scathing review on the seller to post for all to see? I'm thinking they will just re-emerge under another name. This particular seller had a 100% positive feedback rating and from what I saw it looked legit. I should have been a little more leery when I realized it was coming from Shanghai. If it seems like it's too good to be true, then it most certainly is too good to be true.

I have bought many things on eBay before, mostly stuff for my kids, but this was the first time I went out on a limb and purchased something with a higher risk factor. I think I'll wait it out for a day or two then contact eBay if I get no response. I'm not sure if that will do any good because I'm sure crap like this happens all day, every day.

Shoulda known better.

PT Barnum may have been on to something.....sucka.

I Need A Cold Shower

Ok, so if you don't want to hear the most ridiculous, selfish, ungrateful rant then just step away from The Dandy today and have a great weekend.

It's ok, really. If you don't want to hear me sound like the spoiled, self centered, ungrateful little hog that I am, then please navigate to another page. Because what I have to say today just may ruin my saintly streak...(which is a joke because anyone who spends anytime over here knows that I am no saint)

Well, they did it. They managed to get me. Yup they did! They are throwing me a shower tomorrow and I'm pissed. I guess it was supposed to be a surprise, but they had to tell me because I was scheduled to work and I had appointments for make-up applications, which I had to re-schedule. Now I know what you are thinking...how wonderful! And bridal showers are a wonderful thing.....for a blushing, new bride. WHICH I AM CLEARLY NOT!

Listen, I have been to this particular rodeo before and I am not 23 years old....double that...almost, but not quite, and you have me, older than dirt bride. So here's the thing: I told EVERYONE many months ago when we got engaged, please......no shower. It's really the only thing I requested. I told my family and friends that at my age I do not need anything.....pots, pans, sheets, etc...I'm all set and I already went down the "shower" road the first time. I told them I would much rather have a fun evening out with my girlfriends. I thought I made myself clear.

Evidently not.

Now I have to ooooh and aaaah and open the wonderful gifts that my guests spent their hard earned money on, to honor my committment to my wonderful man, and, I'm sorry, but it's all so unnecessary.(God forgive me)

I didn't want this.

I would have rather bought them all gifts...and for that matter, screw the gifts because that is not what this is about. I'm freaking 4o something years old, and I have been running my household for quite sometime now, I need for nothing except for my "peeps" to join in the celebration.

I know, I'm awful.

And in a way, I'm embarrassed. I'm too old for this crap.

And I asked you NOT to do this.

Please, just come and celebrate. I'm not into the celebration being a financial committment for anyone. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have a family and friends that are willing to go out of their way to celebrate this joyous occasion, and I love them for it.

I really do.

But a shower??? No, please, couldn't we have done it in another way?

I can't stand myself for feeling this way, but I can't help it.

SO what do I do?

Suck it up and put on my best Academy Award performance? When I think about all the money and effort that has UNNECESSARILY gone into tomorrow, I feel like I owe it to everyone to shut up and put up, and how awful that sounds.....How lucky am I? What an ungrateful little hog.

I suck on so many levels.

So, don't tell anyone my secret. I have the best, most loving family and friends on the planet. I'm about to marry the most wonderful guy and I have been blessed in so many ways. My inner circle care only abut my happiness and they want to mark the occasion with the showering of gifts....it's tradition.

I get it.

Even if I don't want it. I'm grateful that they love me enough to want to make me feel special.

Even if they don't listen to a Goddam word I say anyway.