Today's Special: 2 For 1 A "Real Bargain"

So there has been a lot of funny talk about marriage at The Daily Dandy lately. I called to memory-and even pulled up and recited-a post that made me chuckle. I thought it really put things into perspective then and I still do now, as I have repeated this story more than once in the past week.I hope it brings you a laugh and some perspective too.


This is a RE-POST which first appeared here on July 29th, 2010. Titled "Divine Intervention"

So I was at my store the other day and one of my favorite customers and I were having a chat. We were talking about marriage and spouses and such, seeing as I'm heading down that path again in just 5 short weeks. We talked about longevity and commitment and how marriage is work. I was telling her that my mom has been complaining that she is really frustrated with my dad lately, for one reason or another. My customer then relayed this story to me, which I found to be quite amusing, indeed. I then, immediately relayed the story to my mom. True or not, this is one I will remember.

She told me that she had seen an interview with the Rev Billy Graham and that she always calls it to mind when she is feeling less than amorous with her spouse. She said it gives her peace.
The story goes like this:

The Reverend was asked by the interviewer if the Lord had ever spoken to him directly. The Reverend response was, "Only once." He went on to say that he had been arguing with his wife one day and while shaving his face alone in the bathroom, still stewing over the specifics of their argument, the Lord spoke to him and said, "You're no bargain, either."

I couldn't help but think it was genius.

Whether or not the higher power actually intervened and spoke those words of truth to the Reverend is completely irrelevant to the point, which is, so true.

"You're no bargain, either"

Damn, ain't that the truth.
This is not an endorsement of the Reverends teachings, or a religious or political agenda advancement. It's just a simple take on that age-old commitment of marriage.

It sure puts things into perspective doesn't it?

Sadie, Sadie, Married Lady

Ok, so enough already about me. I promise I won't bore you with the details about my fabulous wedding anymore. Really, I wont.....after today?

You want to hear about the honeymoon???

Yeah, I thought so.

Sure, I'll give you some of the deets on the honeymoon, but not the ones you're looking for. Hehehehe....Some things are better left unsaid. (Alright, down boys...)

Anyway, Cabo was HEAVEN and rather than tell you I'll show you.

This is the SPECTACULAR Las Ventanas Resort in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. I have to tell you, it was the nicest resort I have ever been to. (and I've been to a lot of nice resorts) Believe it or not the pics do not do the minimalistic beauty of this place justice.




This is the view from our outdoor terrace. I took a nap on that couch one afternoon. What you can't see is to the left of this picture, just on the other side of the sofa, the "just small and cozy enough for 2", jacuzzi.















This is the view of the resort from our roof top terrace, one of two terraces that we had with our suite. SICK huh? When we got to our suite, they had Harry Connick Jr crooning on the stereo system, serenading us. Later that evening they served us a private, candle light dinner on the roof top deck.



Sorry for the blurry shot. As beautiful as this dinner upon our arrival was, it was pitch black up there, so they gave us mini flash lights so we could read the menus.

This is the bed in our suite and after we enjoyed our dinner up above, we came down to see it looking like this:

They had aromatherapy candles burning and had drawn us a bath with rose petals.

You getting this?

There was not one request the staff did not cater to and it was always "a pleasure" as they tell you. We had our own butler, who was waiting for us every day to take us to whatever scheduled activity we had, or to bring us whatever we needed. This was heaven to me considering I am the butler to everyone else at home.

We played golf twice and I played quite well, considering I did not play at all this summer. Especially after 9 holes, when I did a complimentary shot of tequila! These people love their tequila and I can see why. Smooth stuff.

Anyway, Las Ventanas is the playground to the stars. Who did we meet there??

That' Ryan Seacrest and his beautiful girlfriend Julianne Hough. They were there for the Labor Day weekend and were quite friendly. I have to give him credit, they were all over the resort, at the restaurants for dinner, breakfast and lunch. They were at the bars, they were at the pool and he didn't really pull a power "celebrity" play. We even had a nice chat with them both in the gift shop. He's really cute and so is she.

The only time I saw him play the celeb card was during this shot. They were eating lunch at the sea grill by the water and wouldn't you know the paparazzi pulled up on a boat to snap pics. Here they are moving them to the back of another restaurant so they could get away from the blood sucking paparazzi.

While sitting at the pool I also met, Bob Harper the trainer from The Biggest Loser. I didn't know it at the time and I still don't know him because I don't watch the show, but I LOVED him and his partner. We had the nicest conversation. Now in hindsight, I can only imagine what he must have thought of me, in my BIKINI...oh, the horror.
Anyway, the honeymoon was unforgettable, the wedding spectacular and today, life is good. Which is really all one can ask for.



But the real bonus for us was the children. They literally stole the show.

They gave the toast which was written by them one night just before the wedding (it was the most time they ever spent together NOT fighting) which brought. the. house. down. They were articulate, dramatic, funny, and serious. They both told My Guy he was officially their father, which brought a tear to his eye, and everyone else's. Then Frick sang, "Today was a Fairytale" by Taylor Swift with the band and everyone was on their feet.



The speech and the song was the proudest 15 minutes of my life.

So if I ever question whether or not my kids were happy with my decision to marry My Guy, all I have to do is look to this picture for the answer.




That day truly was a Fairytale.

We Did It!!!

Say Hello To The Old Ball And Chain

So tomorrow is the day.

Yup, I become the "old ball and chain". Or the new ball and chain, which ever way you want to look at it. And he becomes my ball and chain. And I couldn't be more excited! How lucky I am to have found a great man to share the rest of my life with. We are all so fortunate. So this is my last post as a single woman. Do I feel different? No, just better, in the best way possible.

I'll be on my honeymoon for a week in fabulous Cabo San Lucas, Mexico and will return to the bloggersphere on Tuesday, September 7, 2010. The question remains as to whether or not I will post a picture. Maybe sooner, maybe later. It all depends, but I will give you all a look at my big day eventually. Thanks so much for all your kind words of support and encouragement.

Blessings and love to you all.

I'm really going to do it!!

2 Days And Counting

The excitement is building.

The out of town guests are arriving daily.

The task list keeps getting bigger and longer.

The suitcases are lovingly organized and packed.

The weather is clearing up.

The ceremony has been written.

Minor details are the order of today.

Got to squeeze in a work out.

Got to blog.

Got to stop and take it all in.

Got to remember, this is the fun part.

Just breathe.

It will all be over before I know it, got to enjoy it all.

Second time's a charm, right? Or is that the third? Oh well, I hope I never have to find out about thirds.

There's something so right about this time. Maybe because I'm older and I'm smarter. Maybe because I look and feel better. Maybe because my kids will be beside me because we are all getting married.

Maybe, just maybe, because he's the right one.

The Right Stuff

So the countdown to the BIG DAY stands at 8, as of today.


8 days.


Today is my final fitting on my wedding gown. I am soooo happy to have lost close to 21 lbs this year so I can look FLY in my gown.


I did it by working out hard and abstaining from sugar.


That's right, no sugar..no way.



I shudder to think about what the stress of planning a wedding could have done to my body.


I could have completely gone the other way.


.....on a steady diet of cookies and cream puffs.....

God, forgive me.........just saying.

Have a great weekend bloggers!

From The Musings Of My Mind

Hemingway I'm not and chances are I'll probably never be, but if there were a time when I needed to call upon the great literary artist's soul, it was never more than now.

I awoke this morning at 4:45am filled with worry.

I have to write my ENTIRE wedding ceremony. More accurately, I have to SCRIPT my entire wedding ceremony, down to the very last second and I just gotta ask myself, HOW THE HECK DID I GET ROPED INTO THAT ONE???

I know how. The second the JP who will be performing the ceremony said,
"I don't really say much of anything other than ,'do you take this person'. So if you want the ceremony to be longer than three minutes, you have to write it yourself."
Oh yeah, Candy, you're a writer, you can do it. Script it? No problem. All those years of sports journalism copy you have written for broadcast?? It should be a piece of cake. What the hell was I thinking?? Writing a script for TV is one thing. Scripting the most important moment of your life is another thing entirely.

So here I am staring at a blank page, my writer's credentials never more paltry than now.

Have any of you done this before? What the hell am I going to do?

I tried brainstorming, the usual catalyst to the floodgates of my mind spewing forth but the best I can come up with is a theme; Love and Family. I have a template for the all-important "do you take" stuff, but everything else I write seems sophomoric and cliche. And I'm all about wow-ing the audience with my glittering prose, just not so much in this case. Cuz it's important and it has to be meaningful.

I need your help bloggers.
Chances are I'm not going to get voted off this wedding script island, so since I'm out here alone I need some inspiration. I'm confident I can handle the personal details but I need some direction, and I want it to be memorable.

Any ideas??

Divine Intervention

So I was at my store the other day and one of my favorite customers and I were having a chat. We were talking about marriage and spouses and such, seeing as I'm heading down that path again in just 5 short weeks. We talked about longevity and commitment and how marriage is work. I was telling her that my mom has been complaining that she is really frustrated with my dad lately, for one reason or another. My customer then relayed this story to me, which I found to be quite amusing, indeed. I then, immediately relayed the story to my mom. True or not, this is one I will remember.

She told me that she had seen an interview with the Rev Billy Graham and that she always calls it to mind when she is feeling less than amorous with her spouse. She said it gives her peace.
The story goes like this:

The Reverend was asked by the interviewer if the Lord had ever spoken to him directly. The Reverend response was, "Only once." He went on to say that he had been arguing with his wife one day and while shaving his face alone in the bathroom, still stewing over the specifics of their argument, the Lord spoke to him and said, "You're no bargain, either."

I couldn't help but think it was genius.

Whether or not the higher power actually intervened and spoke those words of truth to the Reverend is completely irrelevant to the point, which is, so true.

"You're no bargain, either"

Damn, ain't that the truth.
This is not an endorsement of the Reverends teachings, or a religious or political agenda advancement. It's just a simple take on that age-old commitment of marriage.

It sure puts things into perspective doesn't it?

Weekend Recap

I'm off early today....a quick re-cap of the weekend events:

• the shower was FANTASTIC! Holy crap, I am an ass. It was in one of my most favorite places, the people, the food, the whole thing....one of the best day's of my life. The only thing missing was Frick, but she's having a great time in Italy right now.

• It wasn't your average shower. The theme was lingerie and I got so many beautiful things. Good thing the weight loss tally is at 19 lbs. My Guy is soooo lucky. hee hee.

• I eneded up staying overnight at the hotel where the the shower was held with my 4 good friends from high school. We had the best time, had wayyyy to many drinks and ended up sleeping in the same bed together. ALL FOUR OF US. Hugh Heffner would have been in heaven. I love those guys.

• Did I mention I'm still recovering?

• I'm beginning to enjoy this whole "wedding" process.

• I couldn't ask for a better family and friends to share this with. I am so grateful for their love and support.

"Lucky is the man who recognizes that his blessings out weigh his problems"........

That's me. Luckiest lady in the world.

I Need A Cold Shower

Ok, so if you don't want to hear the most ridiculous, selfish, ungrateful rant then just step away from The Dandy today and have a great weekend.

It's ok, really. If you don't want to hear me sound like the spoiled, self centered, ungrateful little hog that I am, then please navigate to another page. Because what I have to say today just may ruin my saintly streak...(which is a joke because anyone who spends anytime over here knows that I am no saint)

Well, they did it. They managed to get me. Yup they did! They are throwing me a shower tomorrow and I'm pissed. I guess it was supposed to be a surprise, but they had to tell me because I was scheduled to work and I had appointments for make-up applications, which I had to re-schedule. Now I know what you are thinking...how wonderful! And bridal showers are a wonderful thing.....for a blushing, new bride. WHICH I AM CLEARLY NOT!

Listen, I have been to this particular rodeo before and I am not 23 years old....double that...almost, but not quite, and you have me, older than dirt bride. So here's the thing: I told EVERYONE many months ago when we got engaged, please......no shower. It's really the only thing I requested. I told my family and friends that at my age I do not need anything.....pots, pans, sheets, etc...I'm all set and I already went down the "shower" road the first time. I told them I would much rather have a fun evening out with my girlfriends. I thought I made myself clear.

Evidently not.

Now I have to ooooh and aaaah and open the wonderful gifts that my guests spent their hard earned money on, to honor my committment to my wonderful man, and, I'm sorry, but it's all so unnecessary.(God forgive me)

I didn't want this.

I would have rather bought them all gifts...and for that matter, screw the gifts because that is not what this is about. I'm freaking 4o something years old, and I have been running my household for quite sometime now, I need for nothing except for my "peeps" to join in the celebration.

I know, I'm awful.

And in a way, I'm embarrassed. I'm too old for this crap.

And I asked you NOT to do this.

Please, just come and celebrate. I'm not into the celebration being a financial committment for anyone. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have a family and friends that are willing to go out of their way to celebrate this joyous occasion, and I love them for it.

I really do.

But a shower??? No, please, couldn't we have done it in another way?

I can't stand myself for feeling this way, but I can't help it.

SO what do I do?

Suck it up and put on my best Academy Award performance? When I think about all the money and effort that has UNNECESSARILY gone into tomorrow, I feel like I owe it to everyone to shut up and put up, and how awful that sounds.....How lucky am I? What an ungrateful little hog.

I suck on so many levels.

So, don't tell anyone my secret. I have the best, most loving family and friends on the planet. I'm about to marry the most wonderful guy and I have been blessed in so many ways. My inner circle care only abut my happiness and they want to mark the occasion with the showering of gifts....it's tradition.

I get it.

Even if I don't want it. I'm grateful that they love me enough to want to make me feel special.

Even if they don't listen to a Goddam word I say anyway.

Sunny Funny Honeymoon

The wedding planning is going along smoothly, so far, with a just few things left to do. One of them is the honeymoon. We have yet to finalize it because, it seems we can't agree.

At issue: Destination

I want to go to Greece. I've been talking about it for three years and I think it would be perfect.

He does not want to travel for 13-14 hours away from the kids, (yet I do) and we only have about 8 days.

The week we are gone is the first week of school for Frick and Frack (his first time in HIGH SCHOOL). My sister will stay with them for the first week and my parents can fill in for a few extra days. Plus, I have 3 too many dogs, and they make my house a crazy house. 8 days is about the max we can squeeze out.

SO at this point, the options are:

Anguilla-Cap Jaluca Resort

Cabo San Lucas-The One and Only Resort

St Barts-Any resort advice?

Mustique-????

Brittish Virgin Islands-????

Turks and Caicos-Parrot Cay Resort-we have already been here and loved it so much, it has become the standard by which we measure all resorts. BUT-I think we'd rather go somewhere we have not been.

I feel we are blessed to be able to even consider such wonderful options, so we both want it to be special. We are leaning the Cabo San Lucas way, because The One and Only seems to be an amazing resort.

Any advice bloggers??

Where is your dream destination?

What have you got? Dazzle me with your travel prowess....

It's A Fricken Racket

Not to bore you with the details of my pending nuptials or anything but I feel a rant coming on.

SO, we set the date, which is a great thing, (late Aug 2010) and found the venue. So far so good. We even found a historic, gorgeous, amazing, non-denominational chapel to have the ceremony in, which is located in the heart of Boston, on the first block of beautiful Newbury Street, a stone's throw from where the reception will be. I, being a divorced, scarlet woman in the eyes of the church, cannot get married in the church, so this is the closest thing I can get to a sacrament for the mere price of $2500.00. It's important to me, so we compromise.

Then we hired a wedding planner. More $$$.

This being my second time at the Rodeo but My Guy's first, coupled with the fact that we are both over 40, we want to have a beautiful party, but nothing over the top. I will wear a simple but stunning gown, and we are looking forward to sharing the day with 100 or so family and friends. Both of us are 1 of 5 children, so believe me when I tell you the guest list is almost all family.

Because we decided to hire a planner and have the reception in a historic Boston hotel, we are now being shown options that are in fact, ridiculous, even by my standards. The shit that is being presented to me as necessary budget items is astounding to me...and we can pretty much afford to do things the way we want to. The problem is, that when I see these things, I can't help but have a Pavlovian response to their beauty. Hence, the racket.

Things you wouldn't believe the "experts" say you must have:

• expensive linens-patterned fabric napkins, napkin rings, and flatware because the hotel linens aren't good enough?
• chairs-the hotel chairs aren't good enough?
• lighting throughout the entire room, centerpieces etc. to create an atmosphere-I have to say lighting does make a difference, but for 6 to 8 grand???
• extra furniture- couches, cocktail tables, to create a lounge-y atmosphere so that guest can relax-because again, the hotel chairs aren't good enough.
• Flowers, flowers. flowers-because you don't want the place to look bare
• bathroom baskets and custom baskets for your overnight guests-a nice idea, but really, do I have to? I think those bathroom baskets are CHEEZY!!
• Wedding favors- really? Cmon, I'm not 21 any more.
• the right band-"ummm, yeah, those guys aren't good if they are available." huh? every body's getting a cut of the cake on the "it" bands, and the band is kind of important, so we are at their mercy. It's been kinda ugly watching everyone hash it out.

So you can see where I am going with all of this, but don't worry. Mama didn't raise no fool. And I'm not marrying a fool either. We are blessed enough to have the opportunity to be able to do it this way, but we will not let this get out of hand.

For me, it is more about the marriage than the wedding and I have no doubts that it will be a memorable, beautiful event without getting fleeced all the way to the altar.

A Most Engaging Vacation

Hey all!!

It's so nice to be back home. Aruba was, of course, amazing!!! The weather was hot and perfect and the casino's blackjack tables were hot as well!! The locals were most hospitable, and the island seemed happy to be hosting us for the week.

We spent a lot of time enjoying the beautiful sunsets on the beach, relaxing, reading and just taking in the quiet time spent together. I'd have to say, it was one of the best trips to Aruba we have ever taken.

I have lots of amazing pictures!

I took some of the crystal clear blue ocean water we spent out days floating in.

I took some of the lazy palm trees blowing in the Aruba sun.

I took some of the blue and green lizards that enjoy sharing the resort areas with the tourists.

I took some of the beautiful sandy beaches and the breath taking, vivid pink sunsets we watched almost every evening.

Come to think of it, one special evening, while walking barefoot on the soft, sandy beach, on our way to capture the last moments of the beautiful sunset.....

My Guy kneeled down on one knee....

and asked me to spend the rest of my life with him......

Of course, I said yes.....