Remember Me?

I've returned.

It would seem that I turn to writing when I don't know what to do with myself.  I put my words on paper and try to make sense of it all. And there's a lot going on that doesn't make sense these days. So, I decided to click onto my old friend Blogger and I signed into The Daily Dandy. It was that easy.

It feels good to be back. Me and the keyboard "having a conversation about nothing". But these days nothing seems... trivial. Life is changed drastically since 2016, the last time I logged into this place; my home for my words and my thoughts. But I guess that's the thing about going home, you somehow are comforted by the stability of what you know and it feeds your soul.

Comfort is something we all desperately need because right now. Life as we know it, knew it, and will live it is drastically different. That's the straight sh*t. No kidding.

Covid-19 has taken our world hostage, quite literally and we are left to wait, worry and wonder when and if we will make it out of this pandemic. We are all looking for answers and assurances that this too shall pass. But there are none.

As of today, I have been self quarantined at home for 7 days. Unprecedented. TV News media is my constant companion. My store is closed. No work, no business, no American dream or engine that drives our economy because "social distancing' must be our new normal. No restaurants, malls, boutiques, stores or coffee shops open. It's almost eerie.

I know I'm not alone. Mankind has been a great partner in all this, and we must stick together. Today, by the grace of God, I am healthy and my family is healthy. That is a blessing. So I'm going to focus on the blessings. The small things, the memories we have been making at the dinner table, and I'm going to do my part to slow the spread of this virus.

I'll come back here a lot, during this.
I'll talk about nothing and something and that something we are all talking about.
And together, we will connect without actually connecting.

It's good to be home again where I belong. In my own little universe

Price Wars

Being in retail, my ears perked up when I heard about the newest level of price wars between fast food giants McDonald's and Burger King. Last week Burger King announced a dramatic cut in the cost of it's Chicken Nuggets. Burger King is now offering a 10 piece chicken nugget for $1.49. This comes on the heels of McDonald's ultra popular Monopoly game, which has proven to be a traffic driver for the food mecca. So what does McDonald's do? McDonald's "sees" Burger King's $1.49 10 piece Nugget and "raises" with a $5.00 20 piece nugget, plus offers the fan favorite Monopoly game to boot.

What does all this mean?

It means that in the proverbial pie of fast food sales, there are only so many pieces. The loss leader in competitive sales has become an every day thing. So what does all this mean for a little guy like me? It means a heck of a lot and here's why:

• Retailers make 30% of annual revenues during the holiday season. WHAT THAT USED TO MEAN: Shoppers will shop. Period. WHAT THAT MEANS NOW: Retailers need to attract the customer. Even loyal customers.
• For most retailers, the Internet has changed the way we do business. Heck, the internet has changed the world but for retailers that means there is a World Wide Web of competition out there for goods. We must stay competitive to stay in the game. So how do we do that?
• Black Friday used to be the busiest shopping day of the year! Thanks to "Door Busters", Black Friday sales and deep discounts, retailers have to have a strategy to make their numbers and that spells out DISCOUNT. 
• More sales and discounts are a necessity and are now commonplace in a sales plan. And more frequently that ever before.  

It's amazing to me that even the big guys like McDonald's worry about market shares.I'm aware that they, of course, worry about staying on top and I know that we all worry about the bottom line, but I am surprised to find that the biggies and I share a common ground. It's the new age of competitive sales and in this Internet world, nothing is for sure. Service and reputation are a big part of it, but the facts are what they are. If you can't attract the client to your location or your website or your restaurant, you are all done.

The bottom line now means that they won't buy if they don't come. 

If You Build It, They Will Come.

Sometimes I wonder if I have what it takes to be successful.

Some Days are harder than others and some days are a breeze, but if I could swap the me that appears on the easy days for the me that appears on the hard days, then maybe I'd be onto something. While it's true that the most successful people actually survive when the going gets tough, I'd like to think I would not only survive but thrive. But as I said, some days its tougher.

Things are good, but I need them to get better and I'm just now trying to figure out how to make something good into something amazing. That's the real key, isn't it? Making something from nothing and turning that something into gold. If it were that easy then I guess everyone would be doing it. I'm talking about growth. Real growth. Double digit growth and I'm just now trying to figure out just how that is accomplished. Nobody said it was going to be easy. Nothing that's worth having ever is, but the true measure of a business is how you build it and how you grow.

Never one to turn my nose up at a challenge, I press on. I read all the business manuals and I go with what I know; what I'm good at. I know there is crazy potential here, and I need to tap into that "what makes me unique" thing to survive and grow. How much of success is patience and hard work and how much is plain old luck? I'm not sure, but I can guarantee I will live or die trying.

Cuz I built it. And they are coming. The question that remains is how we get more to come and keep them coming.

Snow Job

We survived!

The Blizzard of 2013 was not a bust like I thought it was going to be. It was exactly the power packed punch that the media meteorological gods predicted that dumped over 2.5 feet of snow around here. 

The thing is, this ain't our first time at the "historic" storm rodeo.  We are hearty New Englanders  and when it was all over we came out to inspect the impact. Suburban inlanders, like me, handled the snow fall quite well, considering we never lost power in this part of the state. We rode out the storm in the lots of  food, TV, movies and warm comfort of our homes. WE were lucky. 

Our coastal counterparts were not so lucky. Out of power since Friday, flooding and severe winds caused expensive damage to most coastal areas. There were tragedies. Like the dangers of carbon monoxide that tragically took three lives, including that of a 14 year old boy. Just tragic.

So today, we go back to business as usual, but it's nothing usual at all. The freezing rain that is falling right now reminds us of the dangers of two feet of snow topped off with freezing rain that turns to ice. Especially on our roof tops. As I said, we are used to this and I have to say the state handled this storm beautifully. The Friday afternoon driving ban made things much easier for travel when it was lifted by 4PM Saturday and the media and the Commonwealth kept us updated as the storm progressed. 

As for me? It's off to work now. See that snow bank above? 

I gotta go shovel it. 

Mars Vs. Venus

If it's true that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, then we must really be living on two separate planets. I'm referring to business specifically, but it's also an age old question for the age old battle of the sexes. The answer, it seems is simple; men and women are different. Truth is, it's not really that simple.

Men and women approach business from different perspectives. Both genders can achieve great success, and both genders have unique strengths that can attribute to that success. Because we approach things differently, who's to say there is a template for what equates to success and what does not. Women tend to be more emotional because society encourages a more nurturing woman's role in all aspects of life. So in the workplace or in a position of power is there room for emotion?   Mental toughness is a strength, yet emotion is seen as a weakness? One could argue that it would depend upon the business and the individual, but for some, emotion is what drives their success.

In sales, emotion is paramount to hook your audience. The goal is get them excited about your brand and hopefully emotionally invested in it so that they will come back to you, time and time again. Without emotion, consumers couldn't be brand loyal and vendors couldn't motivate them to trust that brand and spend their money. Picking up on client's emotional cues or hints of unhappiness and responding to them help to keep them happy and build relationships based on trust and respect.

On the other hand, when making business decisions, emotion sometimes can cause frustration and removing the emotion from the situation is best advised for making sound decisions. A "never let them see you sweat", kind of thing, and both genders sweat emotionally in business from time to time. Barking back at a co-worker or spouting off a nasty group email, which seems satisfying in the moment, in retrospect is never a good idea.

We are different, men and women, and as such we handle all kinds of situations from different mindset.

Case in point: Take a look at Secretary of State Hillary Clinton in a room full of men watching the US take out Osama Bin Laden.

A picture is indeed, worth a thousand words.

Only The Good Die Young

I got some news last night that was just shocking.

We were at Frick's boyfriend's (yup, Hairball's back in picture) graduation party, enjoying the festive evening. I'm talking in a circle with about 4 other senior moms chatting and laughing, when I feel my cell phone vibrate in my back pocket. I had my cell with me only because Frick was at a call back for an audition for a show she's going to do this summer and because it was making her late for Hairball's party, she was freaking out texting me every five minutes to let me know she would be another 10 minutes, another 20 mins, etc.

This time I figured it was Frick, and mid conversation I pulled my phone out of my pocket and saw a text from the woman I do business together with at the store. It read, quite simply, that "The Long Talker"  had suffered a massive heart attack and died yesterday. I must have gasped quite loud, because the women I was speaking with all turned to me and asked if I was OK. I couldn't speak for a moment. I felt numb. It seriously hit me like a ton of bricks and I simply turned my cell phone around to show them the text. I regained my composure and continued on with the conversation, but I was only half there.


I couldn't get The Long Talker out of my mind.


Now, since I wrote the about The Long Talker some three years ago, he has become a good friend. I have not worked with him in over two years, but I continued to see him quite regularly. He continued to work for my friend in her store and he worked for my parents last Christmas. The Long Talker, while he could talk starving dogs off a meat truck, was one of the sweetest human beings in the world. He was a deeply religious and spiritual man, and was both caring and giving to all who he came in contact with.


The Long Talker was one of the good ones.


He was a genius in his work, but was not a fan of the technological revolution and I think it hurt him down the road. I noticed a change in him last January 2011. He lost his beloved dog, and he never regained that jovial smile he once had. I mentioned it to our co-workers and they all agreed. Something was lost. I'm not sure what, but The Long Talker had lost a step. Even in his work. Looking back now, 2011 was not a good year for him, as he had a falling out with my friend, but I continued to keep up with him, even though he was not doing day to day business with us any longer.  

His wife said that yesterday he was gardening outside and came in to the house, not feeling well. He went to get a glass of water, sat down to drink it and dropped dead right there. He had just turned 60 years old. I'm devastated, really. You never know how important a person is in your life until you realize you will never see him/her again. I hope he is at peace now, and his jovial smile has returned to his sweet face. May God bless his soul and keep him in his good grace. I pray for his family to have the strength to endure life without him.

He was truly one of the good ones.

"When The Solution Is Simple, God Is Answering," Albert Einstein

Sometimes its hard for me to believe that I have a child going off to college because I still have moments of uncertainty that make me want to crawl into the fetal position and stay there. You see, that's me right now, the little white guy above and I need to come to a decision about a very important part of my life. I need to choose one of those paths and hope to God it's the right one. 

What do you do, when you are faced with a tough decision? How do you handle it? I do the whole pros and cons thing. I'm an old school, pen and paper kind of girl. I literally write out the pros and cons of a situation and try to trigger that "a-ha" moment which will bring me the answer that I have been seeking. It doesn't always work, but I usually end up learning something. 

Making tough decisions can be character building, but it sucks while you are going through the process, and I am going through the process right now. It calls for maturity and critical thinking, none of witch come easily when it's an important decision. My dad always taught me to remove the emotion from the equation and try to look at it from a purely non emotional view point. That's pretty hard to do when the decision you make determines the fate of something you care so deeply about.

I am the most decisive person I know when it comes to frivolous decisions. I can look at a pair of shoes, a lip gloss, eye shadow or handbag and the decision to pair this with that and that with this comes instantly. Never one to waver over fashion choices, I may ask for help occasionally, but I have an innate sense of what is right immediately. Same goes for when the decision has to do with one of my children. Mother's intuition is always there for me when it come to guiding my kids through tough times in life.It may not always be "right", but it is always right for us. So why is it that I can't make an all important life decision for myself instantly? 

Maybe this answer is not meant to come instantly. Maybe the lesson is in the process and finding the answer   is the cherry on the sundae. I sure hope so, because right now I'm still up there looking out over the paths. And I'm thinking about that fetal position thing....

Old School

I'm thinking I have to go back to school, so to speak, because I need to do some "market research" for the future development of my business. I need to assess the viability of the retail market in my area so that I can make an informed decision about my next move. I'm doing my due diligence.

Since the last time I was in school was in 2000. I may be a little rusty and not sure if I'm quite ready for the comitment I need to make. Sure, I could hire someone who's already obtained most of the data that I need, but with the world of information at our finger tips today, I figure I can at least set myself on the path of knowledge all on my own. And who knows what I will find on my jorney?

Where do I start?

The Internet: of course! Google conquers all.
I was doing some research yesterday and I came across some very useful information along with some email addresses of people who would be willing to help. Email could prove to be a valuable and easy way to exchange information and network.

The library: Yup, the old school, tried and true public library. Whenever I needed to buckle down in school, the library was where I went. I always went to the silent part too. It was the most productive place for me to get my work done back then, so why not now? The librarian may also have some great tips on searching for more information or even getting me to that information.

Local Organizatiuons: The Retailers Association of MA is also be a great place to start. They offer free webinars and links to lots of business resourses.

Networking: Probably the most valuable way to garner information. Speaking to other retailers and comercial real estate agents in the area will undoubtedly shake some fruit from the trees. Like myself, these people have the pulse on whats really going on in the area when it comes to retail. We are the ones in the stores, talking and communicating directly with the consumer. We know their spending habits.

Looks like I got my work cut out for me.
If you've got any suggestions, or know of any magic mirrors that can tell me exactly what I should do, don't hesitate to let me know.

Until then, it looks like I'm rolling Old School.

Chicken Soup For Your Face

Great titles for the American woman.

I just sent an email to my customers about my new, organic skin care line called Patyka. In the email, I admitted my obsession with skin care products. I thank God that I am obsessed with skin care, because when you take good care of your skin, it shows. Right now it is winter and this is the time to utilize those "special care" products to protect and hydrate dry and tapped out complexions.

Just about every day, a customer will come into my store and tell me that they have a million little bottles on their shelves, but really don't know what to do with them. I tell them this is the time to USE them. "Just do it", like Nike says, pick up the bottle and put it on your face. If I had to break it down for you I would categorize skin care into three basic steps:

CLEANSE

TONE

MOISTURIZE

Every day, twice a day. It's really that simple. I hear a lot of women tell me that they are too tired at night to cleanse and tone their faces and I say, "If you're gonna shag your ass into the bathroom and brush your teeth before bed, you should be able to wash and moisturize your face properly." It take 5 minutes and it makes a marked improvement in your skin's appearance.

Your night time skin ritual is like chicken soup for your face and when you skin does most of it's work, so pick up those little bottles of serum, the ones you are not sure about, and use them. The serums are the best thing you can do for your skin. Power packed with anti-oxidants and essential minerals and vitamins, serums can improve skin's overall clarity and texture and can be a boost in the anti-aging process. They fall under the category of SPECIAL CARE and they fall into place right after TONE and just before MOISTURIZE.

There are so few sure things in this world, but I guarantee you, it's a sure thing you will see an improvement in your skin's appearance and quality by making the commitment to skin care. You know you got talked into the product by an enthusiastic sales lady (like me) and probably paid a fortune for it, right? I say USE it and feed you soul by feeding your face and taking care of what God gave you.

They don't call it your "money maker" for nothing.

OMG! It's Madness

I'm sorry peeps...but this is me today.

I am one step away from a freakin' melt down cuz I have no time. I'm sure you can all relate.

Good Lord...give me grace.

Team Of Me

So I just joined Facebook and Twitter, for business purposes, not personal. What's funny is once a friend found out my page was me, a tsunami of people I know caught on and now a lot of my high school friends are now my Facebook friends and other people I know. Which is great! The more the merrier, I always say.

The issue here is that these entities, being business related, pose for me an interesting challenge. I really can't post pics of my kids and dogs and talk about the beach wedding I went to or the fantastic backyard barbecue I attended at Heff's house. (I wish..that would be fun!) In order to effectively generate whatever "presence" it is that these sites give a business, my posts need to be business related and somewhat memorable.

I am beginning to realize that just about everyone wants to follow you or be friends with you, not because of your witty repartee, but because it looks better to have more friends and followers than not. After a week or so of using/monitoring the traffic on these sites, I realized that the object here is observing the constant stream of posts and tweets, in succession. And we scroll down to see what catches the eye. We notice the people we care about and what they are doing. We notice a funny quote or saying, and we notice who is commenting on our posts.

So I post. But in order to get noticed and remembered, I must be clever. I'd like to think it's about quality not quantity. But how many times can I pimp out my new self-tanning products or a great new lip gloss that's every woman's must have?

This is when it dawned on me.....In order to become a presence on these sites, I must become a Team of Me.

I need to become a Twitter-nality or a Facebook-ona and step into that mindset when dropping a ditty to the world. We all know, from doing this/blogging thing that there are some days that you just don't have it. The add gas light is on and you are plum out of witticisms, but we tredge on, and we do it for the love of the genre. This is completely different because my business image is riding on it. It may be my most important work yet.

So I do it for the good of the company. And I do it for the good of the cosmetic buying society. And I do it so that my customers will never have to wonder about the latest and greatest offerings in my store. That info is only a mouse click away, as it should be. But most of all I do it for you, the customer, because out there in Social Networking land it can be rough starting your day without a witty tidbit about the best shimmering glow for the body and a new revolutionary mascara.

Coffe Talk

Tiny niblets to discuss amongst yourselves:

• The Big Picture: My Guy and my kids gave me the best Mother's Day gift ever. I guess, while on the trip to the mall on Saturday, they had this photo shoot set up in the middle of the mall. You could have professional pics taken and framed, right there while you waited. The best part? Frick and Frack looked like they really LIKED each other. It made me cry. AND, they were totally dressed as themselves. No fancy hassle and it looked like they were having a ball. I treasure the pictures. Best. Gift. Ever.

• BUSTING at the seams: This is a good thing because this time, it's not my waistline. It's The Candy Bar. Things are at a frenzied pace right now, (which is why I haven't been around much. Sorry) and My Guy and My Dad, (who both did not want me to do this in the first place) are pushing me to expand. I just bought into two new cosmetic lines, which are so exciting and are flying off the shelves, and there just so happens to be a vacant store front right next store. I have been working hard building my clientelle and it seems I may have tapped into a need. I dunno though, I'm not even through a year yet, but I just completed my biggest week ever. Say a little prayer for me....

• Four score and forty years ago: It was Mother's day in 1970 and the Boston Bruins were just on the doorstep of a four game sweep of the St. Louis Blues. In game four of a series tied at 3-3 game in the Boston Gahhhden, a 29 year old rookie photographer took a picture of the goal heard round the world, or Boston..today, a bronze statue called "The Goal" will be unveiled on Causeway Street at the entrance of the Garden. Bobby Orr will be on hand for the unveiling and the statue will join Boston Sports greats Ted Williams and Red Auerabach as bronze legends in the city. Possibly a great omen for this year????

• You're all a bunch of Mutha's: To all my blogger friends, I wish to you and your very own mothers the most love and joy a family can bestow upon their family Matriarch.

It's not an easy job, but most of the time we love doing it.

The LONG Talker

How do you politely tell someone that they are F-ING driving you nuts? I guess you could consider this a rant, but really it's a plea for help because I seem to get caught in this situation ALL. THE. TIME.

Here's the straight poop: I had a meeting yesterday with a gentleman that is considered an expert in his industry, to help me complete a project that will hopefully set me on the path to future, gainful, self-employment. He and I hit it off immediately. Since the project I am working on is extremely creative and visual, I was more than pleased that at least three of his ideas were ideas that I also had, and was able to back this fact up with physical proof and action.

Needless to say, we were in sync and hitting a creative groove. The problem was getting any rhythm to this groove because he would interrupt his thoughts by sharing a personal story, that was not only long winded, but time consuming and exhausting, thereby throwing us off the creative point at issue. A meeting (that I am paying for) that should have taken an hour and a half at best, turned into a three and a half hour torture session with The LONG Talker.

In his defense, I think he liked me, (as a potential client) and was motivated by the fact that my idea is somewhat exciting and shows potential. Couple that with the fact that we both were sharing a vision, and he possibly felt a kindred connection of some kind with me, hence the LONG talk. I, too, felt the kindred, professional connection, and was motivated by the fact that I am moving in a positive direction, but The LONG Talk just about killed me.

As I stated, I have been in this situation before, but not on my dime. As a make-up artist working in the industry for the past few years, I always came across The LONG Talkers who sat in my chair. I am like the flame to their moth. I can liken the job to that of a bartender, when you strip people of their make-up, their "defense" against the world, all the barriers fall and their vulnerabilities take the shape of conversation and people start sharing personal stuff that you would not believe. This is by no means a complaint, but a simple fact that I would say goes along with the territory.

I just don't know how or when to cut the LONG'ies off politely. In the make-up chair, it can be tricky because it consumes time, thereby taking me off the floor for the next potential client, but necessary for this client, so to ensure that I have done my job correctly. The LONG Talk somehow always manages to fuck things up. We have a code term for LONG talkers, we say, I had a "life sucker", meaning that client literally sucked the life out of me, because that's what happens. That's exactly what happened yesterday. I walked away feeling physically depleted and uncertain of anything we had just discussed.

In my personal life, I am nice to a fault, and since things are now on my financial terms, I need to learn to strategize my dealings with this man, whom I respect and like, so that the positive, creative life is not sucked right out of me. It looks good on paper, but put me in the situation, and I find myself stuck engaging in LONG talk that deems my professional goal somewhat futile. I have to find the happy medium between the LONG and SHORT of it and somehow keep SHORT the LONG talk.