Notes From The Bunker

Hunkered down inside my house with the wind blowing and the snow still falling, I have become a news junkie. When I am home, the TV is a constant companion, but usually Bravo is streaming live on my TV. Due to today's "historic storm" the TV has been left on the local news channels that have been bellowing emergency information and snow fall totals all morning long. As of now,12 noon EST, in my part of the state we have recieved over 20" of snow with no indication that it's stopping. 

I say bring it! I just made a beef stew in the crock pot and I'm about to make some spiked hot chocolate! We are lucky because we still have power so the play list is qued up and the backgammon board is at the ready. Even Buddy has his storm provisions. He's got a gorgeous bone that he's been happily devouring at my feet for the past hour. 

The govenor has issued a state of emergency warning as well as a driving ban. It's a winter wonderland and I'm curious, so maybe later this afternoon I will venture out into the majestic surroundings. It's not so bad here. In fact, it's a quite cozy sense of community with all the neighbors checking in on each other. With the entire state is virtually shut down, it puts us all in the same boat if just for a day. It is a uniquely New England experience, and one that brings us together. A safe, warm feeling, so I can't resist but state the obvious:

While the weather outside is certainly frightful, my fire is definitely delightful! And yes, we've no place to go, so why not let it snow? 

Hometown Townie

If you grew up in these parts, like I did, there is one thing we know to be true, yet it never ceases to amaze me. We, Bostonians, are true "townies". What I mean by "townie" is that deep down inside we are true to the place we grew up, the culture and the local traditions. And in this town it's all about sports.

Rooting for the hometown team is so much more than a past time around here-it's a passion but what really amazes me is that it knows no boundaries nor age bracket. Take for example our beloved New England Patriots. Saturday was the first game for the home town team in the NFL playoffs which was at home at Gillette Stadium in Foxboro, MA. The streets, shops, malls and restaurants everywhere were a sea of  red white and blue Pats logos. Everybody was talking about it, preparing for it and anxiously waiting for it, like a little kid on Christmas Eve. The Patriots playoff game was a huge event for everyone in New England.

The funny thing is people who never follow football instantly become armchair experts, glued to a televised game that they never would have watched previously. Brady, Edelman, Amendola and Gronkowski become like family and even old ladies can tell you that My Tommy threw for over 300 yards, AGAIN,  in Saturday's game. The short pass from Brady to Edelman who launched a 51 yard bomb to Amendola to tie the game? A complete game changer and people are still talking about that one in the grocery store checkout line and at the post office. It just never gets old. Even little kids are talking about the legalities of the Patriots ineligible plays. No one in this town is safe from Patriots fever.

And I guess that's the way it should be. Shouldn't it? Something special uniting people of all kinds and bringing them together, if only for a short time? Whatever the reason may be; the fever, the passion for a game that is uniquely American and a team that is distinctly ours, I wouldn't have it any other way.
I doubt I could ignore it.
It's a way of life for us townies.
All of us.

The 80's Child

If they say the heart of Rock and Roll is still beating, then this album is more than barely breathing.
80's mega band Huey Lewis and The News,  today celebrate the 30th anniversary of their number one, award winning album, Sports.

Thirty years ago I was exactly the one who was falling for "The Power of Love", as I had posters of the band and clean cut, raspy voiced Huey Lewis adorning my adolescent bedroom walls. The affable Lewis, and his band mates didn't always feel that  loving power, though. They didn't hit record gold until their sophomore album, Picture This with the mega hit- "Do You Believe In Love?" that fueled a 35 weeks run on the Billboard 200 Album Chart.

With the release of Sports in 1984, the band was fast becoming a household name and went multi-platinum with their four, Billboard Top Ten hits, "Heart and Soul", "I Want a new Drug", "The Heart of Rock and Roll" and "If This Is it".  Following their ascent into fame, they then released their fourth album, a chart topping number one, Billboard 200 Album, "Fore!". That album produced five more top ten singles on the Billboard Hot 100 and it then went triple platinum. Suddenly it was very, "Hip to Be Square".

The band is back and embarking on a tour in celebration of the 30th Anniversary of Sports debut. Judging by this morning's appearance on Good Morning America, the boy has still got it, the band is still rockin' and still delivering that special Huey Lewis sound.


So, relax Huey, no need to let you know, "If This Is It", someone would have told you a long time ago.

Beloved Boston

I wasn't there.

Neither my kids nor my husband were there. We were all safe.

She in NYC, is the one who alerted me of the events via text. He, safe on the golf course with my dad, 70 miles away from the war zone. My husband ensconced safely at his desk and I, enjoying a rare day off with my mom.

I wasn't there, but I could have easily been there like I had so many years before.
I can only share with you how most of us Bostonian who live here felt when the first waves of info came in:

It was 3:15, and I'm shopping at Neiman Marcus in a local suburb. Frick texted me. It read, "Mom, did a bomb go off at the marathon?" "Are u there?" "No."I replied." H/O"

I stopped, and searched the web on my iPhone. I googled Boston Marathon 2013. Nothing. I searched some more nothing. I then searched "bomb at Boston Marathon." I found the footage. I clicked on to the raw video and heard the news that a bomb had gone off at the finish line of the Boston Marathon. The report  said it was a, "horrific scene". It went on to describe bloodied streets and loss of limbs and I immediately went into safety mode. I started mentally checking off my family members.

That's what everyone that lives here did.

The first text was sent to my best friend. She lives in Boston and is an avid runner. I knew the answer before I finished typing the text, so I immediately placed a call to her seconds after I pressed the send button. I couldn't wait. She answered, "I'm ok." She was crying.
"Thank God," I said. "Were you there?"

"Can," she said between sobs. "I was right there. I had just decided that it was getting cold and that I had shit to do and that it was time to go home." "I felt the blast behind me and turned to see the smoke."
I was so glad she was ok. So glad she was safe. So shocked that she had been so close. She hadn't even called her mom. I let her go, telling her I loved her and to call her mom.

Then I went over the familial list:
I come from a large family and the majority of us are 20-50. Prime Marathon viewing years. The texts began furiously. While I was walking through the store, word got out and people everywhere could be seen either talking on their smartphones or looking at their smartphones. I drove home because no one really wanted to NOT be in front of a TV at this point and we listened to Boston Sports radio, which turned into news talk on the ride home. It was an uneasy next few hours as we awaited word on the family safety. It wasn't until 6:15 that we knew for sure that both my 26 immediate family members were ok and my husband's 11 members were safe. We were lucky.

Then the worst news of all came.

3 people had died and one of them an 8 yr old boy.

Hundreds of people had been injured. It was worse than we could have imagined. I felt at that moment that life had changed.

We were glued to the TV for the rest of the night as I'm sure you were too.

Trying to make the best of a horrid day which was no happy holiday after all.

Hi I'm Jackie's Packie. We Sell Ciggies and Beer

St. Patrick's day is a big deal in this city. Boston, home of the liberal, Irish Catholic political hack, the St. Patrick's day breakfast in South Boston is legendary. It's an opportunity for partisan politics to poke fun; a roast, so to speak, for political allies and foes.

The city also hosts one of the biggest St Patrick's Day parades in the country in the heart of Irish Catholic Boston, SOUTHIE. Growing up, it was a rite of passage, attending the parade. For me it was always exactly for what it was meant to be for-getting completely hammered and checking out cute Southie boys. A true celebratory "wearin' of the green".

I post his today in honor of that Boston tradition. It's my favorite installment of the Housewives franchise, The Real Housewives of South Boston. While this one is not as funny as the first one, (in fact it's kind of crass) I can't quite say that this one is too far off the mark. While I did not grow up in South Boston, I knew plenty of people who did and I'll venture to guess that after seeing this, they wouldn't own up to spending a few St Paddy's day parade day's this way.

Happy St. Paddy's Bloggers! Keep your Irish up!

We All Say Shit....

I'm sure you've seen a bunch of these by now. Who the heck knows how this whole thng started, but this one made me laugh.

Cuz unfortunately, it's true.

You're Not In Kansas Anymore

So we had a tornado hit Massachusetts yesterday. In fact we has more than one tornado hit Massachusetts yesterday. It was some wild stuff, I gotta tell you. This is how it went down for me:

5 PM: I'm at the store and I get a call from my mom. She's worried and telling me to get home, as they just issued a tornado warning for our county until 7pm. I am scheduled to meet a friend for dinner, so I, of course, pooh pooh her pleas, laugh, and think to myself that it would never happen here.

6 PM: By now everybody in the store is talking about the tornado warnings and watching the TV news. Western MA has been hit by these fast moving storms causing severe damage. I call my friend and tell her that I'm going to go home and wait till 7, because they are also reporting that traffic is at a standstill. I tell her I would wait to see what happens and that I would stay in touch.

6:30 PM: The news stations are showing all weather reports with heavy rains and wind and hail moving close to our area. They are also reporting that there is more than one area that has been hit with funnel cloud tornado's. In all 19 communities have been affected and at least one death has been confirmed.

7 PM: Nothing has happened where I am so I decide to go meet my friend, to which My Guy says, "Are you nuts?" I, again, laugh and decide to think for a minute whether or not I should risk it. The TV news reporters are talking about emergency preparedness, going into the basement or the lowest level of the home, turning up the TV and staying there. The Emergency Broadcast System is popping into the telecast about every five minutes with that annoying beep, notifying us that in the event of an emergency....blah, blah, blah.

7:15 PM: I decide to cancel, to which my friend laughs, but it's no big deal. We re-schedule. (in hindsight, we would have been FINE)

7:30 PM: We are transfixed on the TV because now they are showing live shots of some incredible devastation in the Springfield area. It looks not too different from some tornado pictures of Missouri last week. What the? This is New England. Stuff like this never happens here. I thought it only happened in other parts of the country.

7:40 PM: Gov Duval Patrick comes on TV declaring that MA is in a state of emergency, and that Springfield has been devastated by tornados. A reporter ask him about whether or not this is the worst weather the state has ever seen, to which he replies, "Well, it's not over yet. These storms are still strong and the threat is still very real."

8 PM: I switch to the Bruins game. I got my priorities, ya know. But during the commercials, we were flipping back to the news. One of the huge storms is headed in our direction. We figured if we were in danger the Emergency Broadcast System would keep us posted, but we have one eye on the game and one on the news.

8:50: The dogs are going berserk, the light show outside my window is amazing coupled with some nasty, banging thunder. I see rain beginning to hit my window in a way that is not ordinary.

9 PM: Full blown wind and hard rain are now pelting my home. We are still in Bruins mode, but the outdoor events are hard to ignore. We are now watching both the storm and the game.

9:30 PM: We see blue, flashing lights go by the house and turn onto the street where my parents live, then go right into their driveway. Red lights then follow up the street, as a fire truck then pulls into my parents driveway. Their phone goes right to voicemail. My Guy gets a call that my parents alarm went off at their house, so we waste about a nano-second getting into the car to go check it out. It's still whipping rain and wind.

9:31 PM: My dad opens the door to his house, laughing. (thank God) Their house was hit by lightening and it set off the alarm. My mom said it was so loud that it scared the Bejesus out of her. They are fine. We check the house, like the fire department asked us to, for any smell of smoke or smoldering. Check. They are all set.

9:50 PM: The rain, lightening and thunder have stopped. It's over. We were lucky. Just some wild wind and rain and save from a few branches scattered around we got nothing.

4 confirmed deaths in the aftermath of the storms. The photos from Springfield are unbelievable. Unbelievable because tornados don't happen here.

It was some wild stuff, I gotta tell you.

That's Some Crazee Sh**

Seems brazen crimes are on the upswing here in Boston. This latest crime has many twists and turns, quite literally. Some time on Monday, a fight broke out over smoking on an MBTA bus that ended with a "person of interest" being pinned by the foot by the bus for over an hour.

Crazy as it sounds, police are reporting that a gang attack occurred on the 39 year old driver of the MBTA bus after he asked them to stop smoking on the bus. Just before the pummelling of the driver occurred, he called for help from the police stating, "I got a situation I need to deal with right away...I got a couple of unruly passengers." The assault apparently caused the driver to loose control of his bus, jumping the street curb, ramming nearby crosswalk pole and stopping in the front of a vacant store front, pinning the foot of a man who may or may not be associated with the assailants.

Today police are analyzing a YouTube video of this incident.

NSFW Alert* (I'm not sure if this is the actual video that police are studying, but this is a video of that scene after the bus came to a stop and had pinned the man) This video contains screaming and loud profanity, be advised.




While there are two sides to every story, yesterday our local news media was reporting this story which was described by the man whose foot was pinned under the bus for more than an hour. His story is far different than the story in the local papers. Hmmm.

My point is this, my friend The Walking Man lives in Detroit, where stuff like this happens every 15 minutes. I live in a much smaller city where brazen crime is not as commonplace and nonetheless shocking when it occurs. When brazen crime becomes commonplace, we become desensitized to it as a way of survival and our instinct to help our fellow man gets overridden by the will to live.

And that right there is some crazee sh*t. You know what I'm sayin'?

Everybody Needs A Thneed

So there's a little debate going on here in my neighborhood. One of the neighbors has decided to take on a huge project at his home. He has cleared about a million trees from the front of his house, which has revealed the beautiful facade of said house and a beautiful piece of property. This house is enormous, with what seems like hundreds of windows. It's one of those homes that through the years has been added on to, and then added onto, and then added onto again. This neighbor bought the house about 3 years ago and he got it for a song.

I look out onto this house and I have to say, I think the clearing of the trees looks amazing. For one, it's a beautiful home. But now the property is not tree-covered and I have seen some of the most amazing pink sunsets behind that house. I look forward to seeing many more, especially now that I will be able to view them, unobstructed. So I meet one of my other neighbors at a party a few weeks ago, and I say, "Hey, doesn't 'said house' look amazing?" The reply was, "I'm not a fan, nor am I a tree killer."

Immediately my curiosity was peaked. I continued the conversation and found that there was no real reason for this neighbor to not like the result of the tree clearing, except for the fact that innocent trees were killed and that said house was now much more of a presence on the street. Herein lies the problem, I opined, they are JEALOUS. I could not come up with any other reasonable explanation. Funny, I thought, there still is that "mine is better than yours" sophomoric mentality going on.

I continued to poll the neighbors. My mom, who is one of the neighbors, agreed with me, and after her I found almost no one who could agree. While they all agree that it looks good, each one thought the neighbor was a little over zealous in his tree clearing. I soon dismissed the entire thing and chalked it up to good old-fashioned jealousy and went on about my life. Then, somewhere in the weeks that followed, The Once-ler, from Dr. Seuss' The Lorax, moved into 'said house'. The killing of innocent trees hasn't stopped and continues as I write this; this very minute. The humming of the chain saw can be heard throughout the neighborhood as early as 7am and the drumming of the large back hoe, pulling up tree stumps, accompanies just about most days, lately.

The Once-ler has moved on to the woods beside his property and even I have to say, he's out of control. His property looked great, but now he is clearing the woods with a vengance and I can't quite figure out why. Is he going to build another home there? Is he trying to make his yard bigger? And what about the clearing of the woods? It made me wonder. What about the Barbaloot bears in their Barbaloot suits, who live off the Truffula trees Truffula fruits? And where is the Lorax who speaks for the trees? For not every one is in need of a thneed.

This is what it has become on my street, a children's tale. But fear not, because Karma can be quite a fickle bit*h. As I was leaving for work the other day, I noticed a strange car in my driveway. As I looked out to investigate, I noticed a woman walking on the street holding a camera, snapping pics of The Once-ler's home. She snapped a few pics and hurriedly got back into her car and drove away. I have no idea who that woman was, but something tells me The Lorax was not too far behind her.

The Humbling Of Weston

A huge water main break happened right here in my home town on Saturday, causing more than 2 million people in Massachusetts to be left without clean tap water. The break caused a water crisis unseen in the states history. An immediate order for residents to boil tap water rapidly for at least one minute before using the water for cooking and drinking was issued for the 30 local communities that were effected. On Saturday, while at work, I received a pre-recorded call from the town stating that there had been a water break, but that Weston's water supply had not been compromised. Then, two hours later, I received another pre-recorded call ordering Weston residents to boil our tap water, as it had now been deemed unsafe.

The confusion really set in when in just a few hours later, the phone rang again with the news that Weston's water supply was safe and there was no need to boil water. A scrawling message was broadcast on the local TV stations, all night, listing the affected town's water supplies, and Weston was not one of them. Turns out, it happened here, but it did not affect us. Local TV news aired the mayhem across the state, as people swarmed supermarkets with panic, depleting their supplies of any and all bottled water. Restaurants were forced to either shut down, or limit their service and coffee shops were all but put out of business for a day or two.

It makes one think about how much we take for granted. How lucky we are that we can turn the faucet on in our marbled bathrooms and not think much about the safety of the water that streams through it. About how when something like this happens, we can travel in our gassed up autos, to our food filled grocery stores and buy ample supplies of bottled water with the money in our wallets. About the fact that we have the electricity/gas to allow us to boil the water deemed unsafe and that we can afford to be inconvenienced for a few days.

There are so many others in the world who cannot say the same.
I, for one, am humbled, and although I have not been affected, this crisis makes me think about those who live without safe water on a daily basis.

And I wonder why such a disparity exists between people in the world. As I turn on my faucet and brush my teeth this morning, I will think about why I am part of the hundreds of millions who can.

Senate Race Rule #1: Spell Check

Just in case the rest country wasn't aware of it, there's a little Senate race going on here in Mass between a man and a woman. The woman's a Dem and the man's a Republican and they just so happened to be fighting for THE Senate seat that once belonged to one of the biggest legends of the Senate, the Liberal Lion, Ted Kennedy. If that doesn't warrant the rest of the country's eye upon them, I don't know what will.

The man, MA State Senator Scott Brown, who's biggest claim to fame is his 15 hundred, way-over-the-time-limit-on-fame, minutes daughter, Alya Brown, a Season 5 reject from American Idol, is running against the woman, MA Attorney General Martha Coakley. And it's getting ugly.

Or I should say it's getting good.

Just a few short weeks ago Scott Brown, a pallid underdog who was points behind the technicolor Coakley in the polls, is just now showing his true colors when it really counts. At the finish line. Before this week, Brown was the clear underdog going up against Coakley and the Democratic machine that is MA. With the election one week away, Coakley turned up the heat with an onslaught of negative media ads and it's strategy backfired. Brown then pulled out his favorite weapon, his daughter, *yawn* who was on the front page of the Boston Herald yesterday, blasting Coakley for playing dirty pool with her Daddy. Coakley tried to play the "woman" card in her negative ads, and it may have given Brown the surge he needed in the polls, for as of today, the race is locked in a dead heat.

Besides the snafu the Coakley campaign made with the strategic error, they also made a HUGE, embarrassing error, which wears like a big spot of Ketchup on Coakley's clean whites. In a last minute attack ad on Scott Brown, the campaign misspelled the state of Massachusetts, as, "MASSACHUSETTES". Which leads some to believe that they smell a bit of panic in the air. So what happens when panic ensues? They bring out the big guns. A Brown win would not bode well for Pres Obama's health care reform push, and the Dems would loose the majority in the Senate. I can just hear Teddy turning over in his grave. So Barry just may have to take a trip to Beantown an smile nice with Martha. I know I just LOVE my TV and radio bombarded with their political ads, 24-7.

Either way, it's going to be a busy weekend for the two candidates. Martha has Barak and Scott has Ayla.

While Coakley is still projected to win, Brown has siezed the opportunity to have his voice on the issues heard. If this race is really about health care, I think maybe Scott/Alya have the advantage.

And maybe Alya's 15 minutes is not quite up yet. Maybe the next song she sings won't be a swan song at all, but a song her dad's victory party.

Maybe not. But I bet Scott and Alya Brown can both spell Massachusetts correctly.

RANTalicious

Get ready for a rant, because nothing pisses me off more than wasted real estate in my morning paper.

That there's Daphne Zuniga, of "Melrose Place" fame with her 8 year-old niece, who is serving up ice cream right here in my very home town. Seems she is family of the owners of Cedar Hill Dairy Joy where I live and stopped bye yesterday to work at the Dairy Joy, as it's known here by the locals.

Now I ask you, WHO CARES???

Who is this woman and what has she done since the mid-90's in the world? Yet she still gets credited with the of "Melrose Place" fame tag. She gets a headline story in the local papers and a mention and photo in the Boston papers in the gossip column. WHAT GIVES??

Why is this crap important?? It's not like she donated her day's earnings to a local food shelter or handed out free cones to underprivileged kiddies. Does her presence at the Dairy Joy make the world a better place? Does this use her pseudo-"celebrity" to bring attention to worthy cause or equate with some fun community service?

NO.

The only service she is doing here is for herself and her family, which is fine by me, but does it have to be in my news paper? The thing is, The Dairy Joy does not NEED any charity from "pseudo-celebs" because everything there is RIDICULOUSLY priced, even if it is ridiculously good. They have some seriously good fried clams, and ouch, at $15 bucks for a small box, you somehow justify the price for the deliciousness. For around $20 bucks you can get a lobster roll and cones run from about $4 bucks to $6 bucks, depending on the size. The big joke in town is that you had better bring your wallet if you are eating at Dairy Joy.

Couldn't Ms. Zuniga's "photo-op" have been better served if she partnered with Dairy Joy to bring some charity to the community. Lord knows this town does not need it, but a large, neighboring city, which has lots of shelters and agencies for less fortunate people, could have been better served by a little press and a feel good ice cream-op to bring it's issue into the spotlight. In all fairness, Zuniga did talk about her involvement with Communities for a Better Environment which is an organization committed to "environmental health and justice by building grassroots power in and with communities of color and working-class communities." But where is the action I speak about? It would seem this was more about Zuniga promoting her return to CW's new Melrose Place and her reprising of her role of Jo Reynolds on said show, which premiers Sept 8.

I don't get why this is newsworthy. Does one or two Lifetime movies in the past ten years get the public all lathered up to go out and spend AT LEAST $30 bucks at the local ice cream joint for a peek at fame?

Rant over.

Now I got a hankering for some fried clams.

Seriously.

Ignorance Is Bliss

In case you've been living under a rock, I'm sure you have otherwise heard about all the racism bru-haha bubbling over the top of the proverbial pot and kettle here in good ole' Beantown. Here at ground zero, it's all over the news. It's on the front page of every news paper. It leads every news story. Every. Single. Day.

And it makes me sick.

Then, to make matters worse, our Commander in Chief, had to put his foot into his mouth and step into this hot mess that is at debate. Barry used a bad word and made a freshman mistake.

Big mistake. Huge.
Now he's got to back pedal like a paperboy on his bike riding a flat stretch of street while watching the sunset. Only Barry's not in the clear.

The charges here are serious and the issue has been hotly contested by both parties, leaving a "he said, he did" debate for the ages. The question is, can we move forward, or does this mess send us 500 steps back?
Mother may I take 200 steps forward? Sometimes I wish it were that easy.

Do any of us really think that a brew with Barry at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue will make a difference?
It's possible.
It's interesting.
It's unconventional.
It's kind of ridiculous.
It's something, I suppose.
It's a start.

It's a travesty.

Two men, both in positions of power got into it and the rest of the world will suffer. Is this about two peacocks who didn't have enough room for both their tail feathers to spread?
Is it about who was higher on the power chain?
Is it about respect and the lack there of?

We may never find a solution or make peace with this one, but one thing's for sure; a beer with Barry is not the answer.

HERE is why. (click the linky)

It's All In A Name

See that cute little guy above? He has to go through life with a nasty name like Rat. Nothing cute about that. Lets just say he just got a bum rap in the name department, and deep inside there is a good and pure soul, just waiting to get out. It could be, because I can relate, dude. I spent some of my adolescence with that same name. Sort of.

I was over at The Gancer today, where blogger Dr. Kenneth Noisewater does his schtick and was inspired by his post about bullies to tell you my story. Check him out and tell him I sent you!

I was 13 and in the 7th grade. In my town, the Junior High (as we used to call it back in the "olden days", now it is commonly referred to as Middle School) brought the four elementary schools from different parts of town together. There were lots of new kids coming together and meeting for the first time. In my home room there was a group of boys I didn't know and they were heckling me and trying to get my attention. I can't remember exactly what I said back to them or what happened, but I do remember this one kid in particular ending the scene by calling me a "Pit Rat". I still *shudder* when I think of it, because some how that rotten kid managed to make sure that every boy in the Jr. High referred to me by that name.

It caught on so quickly that even kids I considered my friends began avoiding me like the plague and shouting out my new name in the cafeteria and in the bus line. The damage had been done and I was marked with the Scarlett Letter of names. Those formative years were HELL and I can remember even my own brother who was in High School, four years ahead of me, casually throwing the nasty name at me around the house. It was bad enough that at 13, I had braces and was going through an "awkward stage", but now I was a social pariah and my friends handled interaction with me wearing kid gloves.

I think the breaking point was when I was riding my bike home from a softball game one day and my neighbor's, these two, white trash, butt ugly, greasy twins, who had more than a few inbred, genetic defects like more than one row of teeth (I kid you not), shouted out as I rode by them, "Hey, it's the Pit Rat!" That was it for me. ROCK BOTTOM. I think I cried for a week after that.

But this story has a happy ending.

Like all good fairy tales, the braces came off and the ugly duckling soon became the Freshman Swan when entering High School, and the name was fast forgotten. The good news is that even though I went through HELL, I wouldn't change that experience for Tom Brady's hand in marriage. (and you know how much I love my Tommy). I truly believe it made me a stronger and better person. It made me look at my peers for who they were and not what they looked like or what they were wearing and certainly not for what gossip said about them. Because of this, I was able to befriend kids from all the different social groups, never forgetting a kindness shared with me when times were tough.

I remained with the "coolie" social group, even though they put me through hell, but my new status gave me power and a genuine compassion for others. I later found my social navigation, based on a solid foundation of real, with kids from every realm of the social strata, made me the target of envy from those same people who had name called. And what happened to that horrid kid that started it all? He spent his High School years drenched in his anger, cast out from everyone by his own choice.

I'm sure you're wondering, with my positive lesson learned and with my new status, did I forgive that kid? HELL NO! I never resorted to name calling, but believe me when I say he never DARED approach me or any party where I was in attendance. It was an unwritten rule with him and I. It was even evident when both he and I won the "Class Devil" superlative for the yearbook and he did not show up for the picture. He knew better and I had a big smile on my face for that shot, happy that this gander had cooked his own goose.

As I told Dr. Kenneth Noisewater, some years later at the High School reunion, he approached me and told me that the reason he gave me the name in the first place was because he liked me and I rebuffed him and embarrassed him in front of his friends. I listened to his story, because after all those years, he must have felt the need to atone. But like I said over at the Gancer, if justice is sweet and swift, today he is living in a trailer park with his 250 lb wife and his six, dirty scrappy little kids.

Small Town Murder

March 16, 2008.
Man fatally stabs Grandmother in Weston, MA.

(NECN: Brad Puffer, Waltham, Mass.) - A murder has shocked people in an affluent Boston suburb. A Boston man is charged with stabbing his grandmother to death in her home in Weston, Massachusetts. 22-year-old James Clark appeared in Waltham District Court today to face murder charges.
Clark is now charged in the murder of his 80-year-old grandmother, Eleanor Clark. Police say Clark stabbed his grandmother inside her Weston, Massachusetts home Sunday evening. It is the first homicide in Weston in more than 3 decades.
"There was an altercation there which resulted in James Clark stabbing his grandmother to death," says Gerry Leone, Middlesex DA.
Clark visited his grandmother’s house Sunday afternoon. He later showed up at a neighbors house with blood on his hands.
"The trail of blood led to the next door neighbor’s home. The neighbors learned that the trail of blood was from an injury to James McGuire Clark’s hand. He went to his neighbors house and said he had suffered the injury in a home accident.
District Attorney Gerry Leone says after being treated at a hospital, he showed up at a friend’s house, and apparently told them what happened.
"After telling his friends what happened, they called 911 to a report that a crime had been committed."
Clark appeared in Waltham district court Monday with a Shakespeare and Co. T-shirt and a bandage on his right hand. Prosecutors say Clark is a citizen of the UK but has been living in the US since he was two years old, most recently at a halfway house in Boston. His mother recently moved back to England.

What's going on in my little town? First, torrid and steamy stories of extra-curricular sexcapades with the service tech and now this? Let's just say the "joint is jumping". Talk of the first murder in 33 years sent this small community abuzz yesterday, with TV news trucks sprinkled all over town.

The Daily Dandy roving reporter spoke to neighbors who stated that James M. Clark, a drifter from Dorchester, was well known in the neighborhood and "seemed like a nice kid".

"I drove bye the house last night around 10pm and saw lights on in the house, " the neighbor said. "I thought that was a little late, you know, unusual for her, but I dismissed it."

Apparently, James Clark stabbed his grandmother to death after an altercation with her in the kitchen of her home. Police found the bloodied body of Eleanor Clark under the kitchen table in the breakfast nook with multiple stab wounds on her neck and face; her throat had been slashed. A bloody folding knife was found on the kitchen table and police then followed a trail of blood to the next-door neighbor's house. James Clark told the neighbor he had cut his hand slicing fruit in the kitchen, and the neighbor then drove him to the hospital for treatment. Clark then took a cab to a friends house in Newton, where he apparently confessed to the murder and a 911 call was made to police by his friends.

Clark told police he was "sorry for making them look at his grandmother like that and then requested that police give him a gun so he could shoot himself." Clark is in police custody and on suicide watch.

It's unsettling to think that less that 3 miles away from where my children sleep, a horrific crime like this took place. The Daily Dandy roving reporter will keep you updated on the latest on the story.