What Would Carrie Do?

Let's take a different angle on all this Covid-19 perspective today. While watching my favorite go-to on TV, I decided to think about what this apocalyptic world would look like for the girls from Sex and the City. How would they handle this Social Distancing when their entire existence is centered around Sex...in the city? And just like that, I had my blog post.

I'm going to start with Miranda.

She's the sometimes angry corporate lawyer who is a cynical spit fire with a soft side. Steve, her husband and Brady, her son complete her world. But what about Miranda pre-marriage? I wondered what would this NYC lock down look like for her?

Miranda, I think, would be spending her quarantine days at her well appointed dining room table covered with legal briefs, zoom conferencing with her partners and clients. She'd be calling Carrie, after a long day of work and possibly meeting her for a clandestine walk, six feet apart, down the deserted streets of New York. While all of her possible suitors would be contacting her for booty calls, something tells me that Miranda would cautiously selective, or practicing abstinence for the good of all.

Then there's Charlotte

She is the gorgeous WASP with the Cinderella complex. Charlotte did get her fairy tale ending when she fell in love with her divorce lawyer Harry and had two beautiful little girls; one adopted and one conceived after a struggle with infertility. But what would Charlotte be like pre-fairy tale? Charlotte never gave up on the prospect of true love so what would she do if her all important search was suddenly put on pause?

Charlotte, I think, would spend her days, since her gallery is closed, cleaning out her closet of her Lilly Pulitzer and matching headbands, organizing her designer purses, by color, and watching romantic old movies on TV. Charlotte would not be meeting up with the ladies for a 6 foot walk. No, Charlotte and her Rabbit would be spending quiet nights home  alone.

The one and only Samantha

She is a true original. Samantha the sex-obsessed, brash and straight forward successful PR agent, moved out to the West Coast with her love Smith. She then moved back to the city because she "loved herself more" and we could all use a little more of that in our lives. Samantha was never one to shy away from confrontation, so what would a little self-isolation do to Samantha's never satiated sex drive?

Samantha, I think, would not take this Covid-19 crisis lying down, or maybe she would? Literally. Samantha would be forced to keep her sex line up to a select few. Preferably the ones with a house in the Hamptons and the ones she deemed "clean", because there is no way Samantha would stop having sex. With the prospect of no premiers, restaurants and parties to dress fabulously for, Samantha would be breaking the rules and having safe sex parties in her fabulous apartment in the meat packing district. And that handsome stranger she met while picking up her takeout? Oh Samantha, she may not be able to abstain. " Honey, it's all about the phermones We are all just reacting to each other's smell."

And our girl Carrie

She is our protagonist. Her nervous and self-deprecating personality belies her true intelligence. She is the supremely insightful author of her newspaper column "Sex and The City", and fiercely loyal to her girlfriends.  Carrie finally got her man, and she and John Preston, aka "Big" made it legal. But pre-wedding days, I found myself wondering what a self-quarantine would look like for Carrie?

Since sex is her business, I think Carrie would be spending her days Face-timing her friends and sources looking for leads and delving into what happens when sex is not an option. Then she would be spinning the tale of what Sex in The City looks like without the prospect of sex and the city.

She would be publishing her column daily, and since she was still working, she would definitely be shopping online. A lot. Sales on couture and sales on shoes all with free shipping, Carrie might find herself in a financial frenzy. After long days of writing and scouring unique sex stories, she might possibly invite the girls over to defy the shelter-in-place order to eat take-out and drink cosmos around her circular coffee table at least six feet apart. As for sex, I'm quite confident that during this unusual time in the history of our world, Carrie would be comfortable being an observer, chronicling the trials and tribulations of being a single in the new social-distancing age.

One thing is for sure, with all this uncertainty out there today it's unnerving to have to consider whether having single sex today is safe. Better we tune into our girls from Sex and The City to contemplate the meaning of our sex lives in this new normal.

While the world we live in has changed dramatically, I couldn't help but wonder, "What would Carrie do?"

Big City Momma!

Today's moms are an incredible hybrid of sorts. Made up of one third Super Woman, one third Bat Girl and one third Wonder Woman, super heroes, if you ask me moms are busy super humans. So it's no wonder that moms, after doing everything they need to for everyone else barely have a moment for themselves. And I'm sorry to tell you ladies-it's beginning to show. But fear not-I may have just come up with a solution!

Busy moms everywhere, take notice!

I'm giving my expert beauty advice to moms on the Big City Mom's blog, click HERE. 

And trust me when I tell you-it gets better. And just when you think you got this mom thing down,  you are left missing them when they grow up and fly the nest. So enjoy it while you still can, but make sure you take a little time for yourself along the way.

Dear...

Dear,

Spring,
Where are you? Why have you forsaken us?

Breaking Bad,
I miss you. You were my best friend for a while and I will fondly remember our time spent together.

Hillary,
You can't please some of the people all of the time and I respect the fact that you are trying. Making  history isn't easy. The question remains; is it enough?

Food,
Our love/hate continues. Will I ever have the advantage here? I doubt it but recently I have learned a thing or two so look out.

Business,
Why are you so fickle? I guess that's why I am addicted to your ebbs and flows. I'd like a clearer picture on the future. Could you throw me a bone here?

Blogger,
I have been neglecting you a bit. Someday's life gets in the way so it's not always what we agreed to. I will try to be better about us.

Boston,
I am proud of you. You did real good yesterday. Even in the cold, raw and unrelenting rain. You persevered and showed your mental strength. We truly are Boston Strong.

Key West,
You are so beautiful. Thanks for last week.

Buddy,
I love everything about you. You are the world's best dog. Your loyalty, love and presence are some of the most precious things about home. Thanks for being at my feet every day (even when you don't want to) I'm sure you can sense that sometimes I need it more than you do.


With Much Love,

Candy
xoxo

Ghost Writing

So you all know I watch those zany Real Housewives, as I have said before, they are my favorite guilty pleasure. I watch them all. Much to my delight, Real Housewives New York debuted last night and the antics started immediately. Back are almost all of the women (minus LuAnne) and the fireworks begin when Aviva begins talking about her book deal. Aviva was the one housewife everybody had a problem with when we left them last season, so it was amazing to me that she spent the first episode making amends for her bad behavior and then the second episode destroying all that hard work.

But this post is not about that, per se, this post is about what happened when Carole and Aviva engaged in what is now known on social media sites as #bookgate. Quick history: Carole Radziwill is a journalist by trade, and has worked in the news media and magazine world for what she says is 20 years. She calls herself a "writer", claiming "that's what I do" and she has written 2 books, one which reached the New York Time Best Seller List. Aviva Drescher is what one could call a true NY housewife, who according to Carole, "never had a job outside the home". The second season drama is over Aviva's book deal with a publisher and a lunch between Aviva and Carole where the topic of ghost writers came into discussion.

A ghost writer according to Wikipedia " is a writer who writes books, articles, stories, reports, or other texts that are officially credited to another person." 

Sounds interesting, and if you think so, read on. Aviva and Carole discuss the topic of using a ghost writer. Neither claims to have used one, and then things get hairy. The awkward lunch takes a turn for the worst and Carole takes offense at Aviva's intimation that she used a ghost writer on her first book. Aviva then goes on a gossip campaign, telling all of the other Housewives that "her publishing house told her that Carole used a ghost writer on her first book"  A lot of back an forth takes place, but what sticks in my mind is Carole's objection to the whole topic of ghost writing. Carole has a real point here: she is a career journalist. She has built that career working for news organizations, writing for magazines and working in the field as a journalist for many years. Her books stand alone and her pedigree is impeccable, so I stand behind her when she feels that her reputation as a writer is being called into question. She has earned the right to be called a professional in her trade.

Aviva is a housewife of several wealthy men (not at the same time), and now a reality TV star whose personal story of triumph (she had her leg amputated at a young age in a horrific accident)  is inspirational at best. She was well educated an evidently academic enough to score a book deal with a professional publishing house.

What's the problem ladies? OK, I understand Carole's objection to Aviva telling the entire WORLD on TV that Carole used a ghost writer when she didn't. According to me 'dems is fighting words, and its dirty pool when you try to discredit someone's career. But Carole is not without fault. Because Aviva is not a "journalist" it's not to say she can't become a "writer" and that the idea that she could sit down and write a draft for a book on her own absurd.

Here's what I mean: I have a Master's Degree in Journalism from Boston University. I have this daily blog that I have pretty much written every weekday for 7 years. Before that, I worked briefly writing in local news and TV. Does that give me the right to call myself a writer? Do I need the pedigree of a paycheck from a news organization or a national magazine to lay claim to that? And if not, can I never claim to be somewhat of a writer? What about all those people out there who extensively journal every day, write short stories or blogs? Are they fraudulent "writers" too?

I'm not sure I understand this whole thing. Who has the right to say who a writer really is? I don't deny that hard work and career accolades are definitely constitute a profession. But does that mitigate someone who puts a pen to paper or a finger to a keyboard.......then hits the publish button?

1000 Things I Need To Say

Somewhere along the way in this crazy, fast paced thing I like to call my life, I let a little milestone pass without proper fanfare. And the funny thing is, I just kind of noticed it all nonchalant and then it hit me. I reached 1000 posts. One thousand posts on Candy's Daily Dandy!!! To date, this will now be 1016 posts.

Maybe now Cinemax, HBO or Showtime will come a calling and turn my blog into a fabulous series starring Sarah Jessica Parker as me!!! Right? Turn a dream into reality. Just sayin and dreamin..There can't be only one Candace in the world that's a famous writer. One can only hope.

Anyway, 1000 posts comprises the largest body of my work to date. Some of it complete crap, some of it brilliant, some of it hilarious and some of it poignant and somber. I've shared with you my life, my kids life, my crazy family moments my childhood, my friends and general trivia, news and junk that no one really cares about except maybe us. And let's not forget the comments!! Bloggers, you never cease to make me laugh out loud, cry, and think and inspire me to keep going every day. For you and your loyalty I am grateful. Without you it wouldn't be nearly as rewarding. Heck, Heff, Scope and Zibsy, you all made it into my children's toast at our wedding. Really. I've never met any of you, yet you are all an important part of my life. Thanks for coming along for this crazy ride.

And this crazy ride, so far, has been....one of the greatest things I have ever done. (besides Frick and Frack) My blog is right up there with my favorite things in life. And you are all a big part of it, and for that I thank you and I love you and I am eternally grateful that you take a moment out of your busy day to see what kind of Dandy Candy has to share today.

I'm gonna keep on sharing little Candy Dandy's Daily and I hope you all will keep coming.

1000 Thank you's just doesn't quite seem enough, because I get so much more from all of you.

Heroine In Heaven

Nora Ephron has left the building.

And while I never knew the woman who would turn out to be the essayist, Oscar nominated screen writer and movie director of a generation, I knew her well. Or should I say she knew us well, the "us" being women everywhere. Norma had a unique gift. She could see it then she could write about it.

She could write the hell out of anything and she caught the attention of people in her profession early in her career at The Post. When she fell into Hollywood, quite by mistake, Ephron's prose was so real and funny that it was hard not to see her genius. She turned her divorce from Watergate journalist, Carl Bernstein into literary and Hollywood gold with her novel "Heartburn", which was turned into a screen play and she never looked back. Not bad when you have Meryl Streep and Jack Nicholson playing out your life story. Her many screen writing credits brought her the opportunity to direct and in 1993, she landed her first hit with "Sleepless In Seattle".

She continued to succeed as woman in the exclusive boys club in Hollywood and her credits are impressive. "When Harry Met Sally", "You've Got Mail" and "Julie & Julia" to name a few. Oh, to be a fly on the wall in the mind of Nora's genius. Today, as I read the articles and obits on this legendary lady, one specific essay stands out. Interesting that it was not written for Hollywood or for publication. It was written as a Commencement Address to the 1996 graduates of Wellesley College, her  alma mater. She talked about how upon her entrance to Wellesley, in the fall of 1958, there had been an article in the Harvard Crimson stereo typing women's colleges. Wellesley, it said, was a school for tunicata-(a fish who spend the beginnings of life swimming around exploring the ocean and the second part of life lying on the ocean floor breeding). Nora went on to recall how 25 years later, everyone of her classmates still remembered the definition of the tunicata.

Long story short, the world of Wellesley in those days so long ago, taught Nora and her classmates that they were in college attendance to marry success not achieve success. It would seem that Nora made a career out of proving them wrong. Be your own heroine.

And those words certainly resonate with me.

In closing her Commencement Address Nora said this, and I will remember this always and make it a mantra:

"Whatever you choose, however many roads you travel, I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope that you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there. And I hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women."

Tater Tale

So I heard this great story over the weekend, and I thought I would share it with you.

The book above was written by a local guy, who created, "The Adventures of Pat The Potato" to explain to a young family member about the size of one's heart and what can happen when a young potato finds the courage to succeed. It is a story about a very small, second grade potato who leaves home to get away from the ridicule of being the smallest potato in town. Written for his young family member who was struggling with peer pressure, the book became family lore and was then accidentally introduced to a publisher.

Mr. Gannon, flabbergasted that someone found his children's tale interesting enough to publish, was overjoyed to learn that not only did his tale about Pat sell, but the book was quickly adopted by the Potato Museum in Idaho as their pseudo "mascot" book. The sales of the book from the visitors of the museum and the sales on Amazon.com have been good and Michael Gannon couldn't have been more surprised.

Mr. Gannon relayed how amazed he is every month when he opens his small royalties check from book sales. The publisher has since asked Mr. Gannon to write another book. He has declined, of course, because the story came from an idea he had to help a young family member to understand that it's ok to be small and that sometimes being small sometimes has it's advantages. Never claiming to be an author, Mr. Gannon decided that Pat the Potato would be his only literary effort.

An effort like that, it seems, is no small potato.