20 years have passed since the last time I heard your voice, yet it seems like an eternity. I was a young girl when you left me, today I am a young woman.
I often see your face in my dreams and I reach out to touch your hands. Sometimes you are sick, sometimes you are not, but you are always smiling. Once, you were playing cards at a table with some others. Always the center of attention. The comic. Even the spirits are attracted to your Dean Martin swagger. You come to me as I knew you, with your Sculley cap and Members Only jacket, and I know that wherever you are, you are always with me.
What do you think of the person I have become? I often wonder.
What advice would you give me today? I often ask myself.
I got married once, and my brother stood in for you. Your son. You would have been proud. I am a mother now, and I hear your voice in my head some days telling me to be patient. You never met my children, your grandchildren, yet they know everything about you. I made sure of that. I am the keeper of your spirit and I will sprinkle bits of it over them like a magic pixie dust when they need it. It is your legacy. That spirit is a special something that is our birthright.
God knows you had far more than any human should.
We have taken good care of mom, or rather she has taken good care of us.
But you knew she would. It's why we all chose her. Her strength is inspiring.
And Papa, he has taken good care of us too. He's been an amazing role model for your family and he has taught me about integrity, respect and commitment. I sometimes think you must love him too, as you watch over us. He has fathered us right in your absence. He will give me away to another man this summer, and I think you wouldn't have it any other way.
I know you will be there, with me, on that day.
I know that you are with me wherever I go.
I know that you watch over me as I watched over you.
I know that you watch over my children.
Thank you for being there when I call out to talk to you. Somehow, I always get your message.