Tuesday, October 20, 2009

What's For Dinner?

Beyonce once said in an interview, "What I do isn't hard. It's the women who work all day and have to come home and make dinner. That's a hard job."

Amen sister. You have a fan forever.

Last night I arrive home at 5:30, to the chorus of, "What's for dinner? What's for dinner?"
Not, Hi mom. How was your day?
No. It's all about, "I'm starving." Forget that I was crazy busy all day, now I'm scrambling to whip up some gourmet cuisine for their consumption. And quick too cuz they're starving.

Usually I start thinking about dinner some time after they leave for school. I mull about this or that so I have an idea about which direction dinner is headed, taking into account everyone daily schedules and such. But yesterday was a busy day and I had not a moment to put dinner to my head, hence the 5:30 scramble. I knew on the drive home that I had chicken, but which direction would it take tonite?? So My Guy is set to arrive home at 6:30, the kids are already home and harping on me for sustenance, so I've got almost one hour to prepare dinner. PANIC. I had nothing planned.

In my pantry I find the little baby above, and decide that 30 minutes with this sucker could actually work. Heck, I might even get off easy tonite. I've already got chicken in the fridge, so this is it. Now I need to interject for a moment and tell you that I am not the kind of "prepared food" mom. I am a great cook and I like to plan and prepare a proper dinner, when the time allows. But-ALL 3 of them are freakin picky eaters. Wolfgang Puck could prepare our dinner and at least one of them would complain because there was something in it they didn't like. So I'm already screwed before I have even begun. Still, I forge ahead with this hotmess above.

Much to my dismay, the fresh chicken in the fridge was not needed because the two cans of "chicken shit" that I called it, in the box were complete with some form of chicken and ready to be opened then poured into a baking dish. The guilt began to gnaw away at me immediately. Then the biscuit topping which was easy enough; nine equal drops on top of the "chicken shit" mix and pop into the oven at 400 for 30 minutes. I made some mashed potatoes and worried about the fallout on this one. I figured I'd market it as Chicken Pot Pie only better because of the flaky biscuits. 30 minutes later, everyone sits at the table. It looked pretty good, I have to say, so they approached this one with a slight curiosity.

I took my first bite.....UGH, gross, but I sat there in silence waiting for the inevitable disaster. "Not bad," is what Picky Eater 1 said.
"Mom, this is really good," said Picky Eater 2.
Picky Eater 3 seemed happy and even had seconds....

I can't figure them out.
I kill myself with a fabulous meal most of the time and they complain, but when I serve them shit-literally-they fricken love it and I'm a hero.

I'm just going to throw in the towel here and know when I'm defeated.
Tonite......it's Shake and Bake.


Scott Oglesby said...

“Chicken shit” –hahahaha I love it! I’ve never been one for prepared food either. The one exemption is Shells and Cheese with a good beer buzz. Mmmhh. I’m a huge fan of the crock pot for a full time schedule. There is nothing you can’t cook in there. I used to made the most delicious meals by just throwing chicken or beef, a ton of veggies, and a few potatoes (sweet or red), in with either chicken or beef stock. Then just sprinkle on some cheese and you’re good to go. Or Turkey kielbasa with sauerkraut, anything really, the possibilities are endless.

I finally remembered to add you to my blogroll!

Jim said...

Yep, that's my world, too. Fortunately, mine aren't horribly picky, but I try to steer toward the neighborhood of things they'll probably like. If I've worked my butt off to make something good, even if a little odd, they can whine all they want . . . breakfast will be available in 7 or 8 hours.

I know it sounds like extra work, but I try to plan it out on Sunday, before I go to the grocery store, and buy only what I need for that week's meals. Saves a little money, and everything is there and ready to be thrown together. They do homework while I cook and their mother sips wine with her shoes off.

I also have some good fast weeknight recipes, if you want any --- Spanish Rice, Peanutty Beef, Asian Chicken Salad Wraps, etc. Do you get "Cooking Light?" They have a bunch of them in there.


Cowguy said...

rofl chicken shit... That's such a great pairing of 2 words! I don't cook so it's up to Sal to ruin dinner around here and she rarely ruins it.

On a separate, but similar note... my son and his buddies (all in their mid 20's) were talking bout Hot Pockets yesterday evening and I said, "You know... the ultimate in gastric death would be a Mexican Hot Pocket." So I did a Google to see if such an animal existed. Safe search was "off" on my Google. Mexican Hot Pocket... OH MY GOD. We all just kinda stood there went "holy crap!". So very very very wrong.

Okay that is all.

Carry on.

SkylersDad said...

Because Skyler really can't chew much, almost everything we make has a side of package noodles or some other such "soft" food with it. I doubt I could really even make a decent meal anymore because I am so used to cooking everything soft for him.

The Peach Tart said...

My daughter used to be the same way. Luckily as they get older their palate gets more refined.

Anonymous said...

Next time, storm in, let everybody get situated, with a pissed off look, slap on open box of Cheerios down and some milk and say, "There EAT IT!!" I always enjoyed that, and the baby, if she decided that she did not want it, tough, she would sit there after I took it from her and she would eat it after she got hungry enough. HAHAHAHAH

Kara said...

My picky eaters make my life harder than it should be. Even though I swore I'd never be the Mom who makes more than one dinner, I find myself doing that at least a few times a week. Not that it takes skill to open a can of Chef Boyarde, but it's the principle behind it. I make them nasty meat ravioli and cook myself something actually worth eating, like chicken marsala. That way I at least enjoy my dinner and don't get furious when they refuse to eat any of it.

Anonymous said...

LOLZ! I remember one of my fiends one time told his wife that this was the best stew she had ever made in 20+ years of marriage. It was Dinty Moore! Yeah, that didn't go over too well.

Wil Harrison.com

Mrs. Holly Hall said...

Yeah, I really really really really put my foot down the other week with the wee Pancake.

I said, 'You can't ask or demand anything for 15 minutes AFTER I walk through the door. And then, THEN you have to ask yourself, can I get it for myself?"

Then I make her tell me about her day. Then I make her sit and listen to mine. THEN SHE CAN START ASKIN FOR STUFF!!!

gah. the kids. And yes, I imagine the chicken sh*t would be TONS of fat and salt. Which is yuck yuck yuck. But for kids, it would taste much like heaven :)

Jimmy Bastard said...

For years.. I have rung my missus every night on the way home, and always started the conversation with; "Is mah dinner ready yet doll?"

Yeah I know... I'm a pig!

Cora said...

Candy, I typically work 11 hours a day and I'm a single mom, thus I never cook. "Cooking" for me means anything that has to be microwaved more than three minutes. My kid practically lives on melted cheese and chicken nuggets and she LOVES my "cooking"!!!! As for me? Nuked veggies and salmon is the typical fare - EZ.

Anonymous said...

HA! If you had set up a video camera to record the kids' reaction, I would've paid money to watch!

Your story is too delicious! (There I go with the 'no pun intended again.)

Joanie M said...

I bought that chicken in a box meals ...once. yuck! ptewy! gross! I think my teenager liked it too. I probably had a bowl of cereal instead.

joe said...

Whenever i pass by that stuff in the supermarket, I just keep on going. I've always been afraid to try it.

Scope said...

My mom always dealt with this by saying, "You know where the peanut butter is" when we dared express disinterest in what she made.

Pop and Ice said...

Ick. I can't eat those boxed dinners and my kids (even though they're nearly adults) won't eat stuff that's mixed up - i.e. one food must not touch another food much less mix up meat and veggies.

Pop a can of soup tomorrow and see if you get rave reviews. Your dinner prep anxiety may be at its' end!

the walking man said...

Two Words: hot dogs. If they are particularly crabby and in severe hunger...a third word; microwave.

Furtheron said...

we had home made (by my lovely wife) Lamb Hot Pot last night with left over Lamb from Sunday's roast... can't beat it

Ho ho ho - I'm sure the word veri thing is set up this one is... rehot!

Anonymous said...

Hmm. We don't really have that kind of box meal here. Sounds frightful really. What would I know though - I like Kraft Macaroni and Cheese!

Tatyana Vinogradsky said...

O no! Don't give up! Keep working on it- maybe you should make them cook a meal for once and then they'll see how difficult it is for you- empathy equals sympathy. I know my mom did it to me and I understood her better. They're never too young to start, by the way! Make them peel your potatoes or steam your veggies!