SO, we set the date, which is a great thing, (late Aug 2010) and found the venue. So far so good. We even found a historic, gorgeous, amazing, non-denominational chapel to have the ceremony in, which is located in the heart of Boston, on the first block of beautiful Newbury Street, a stone's throw from where the reception will be. I, being a divorced, scarlet woman in the eyes of the church, cannot get married in the church, so this is the closest thing I can get to a sacrament for the mere price of $2500.00. It's important to me, so we compromise.
Then we hired a wedding planner. More $$$.
This being my second time at the Rodeo but My Guy's first, coupled with the fact that we are both over 40, we want to have a beautiful party, but nothing over the top. I will wear a simple but stunning gown, and we are looking forward to sharing the day with 100 or so family and friends. Both of us are 1 of 5 children, so believe me when I tell you the guest list is almost all family.
Because we decided to hire a planner and have the reception in a historic Boston hotel, we are now being shown options that are in fact, ridiculous, even by my standards. The shit that is being presented to me as necessary budget items is astounding to me...and we can pretty much afford to do things the way we want to. The problem is, that when I see these things, I can't help but have a Pavlovian response to their beauty. Hence, the racket.
Things you wouldn't believe the "experts" say you must have:
- expensive linens-patterned fabric napkins, napkin rings, and flatware because the hotel linens aren't good enough?
- chairs-the hotel chairs aren't good enough?
- lighting throughout the entire room, centerpieces etc. to create an atmosphere-I have to say lighting does make a difference, but for 6 to 8 grand???
- extra furniture- couches, cocktail tables, to create a lounge-y atmosphere so that guest can relax-because again, the hotel chairs aren't good enough.
- Flowers, flowers. flowers-because you don't want the place to look bare
- bathroom baskets and custom baskets for your overnight guests-a nice idea, but really, do I have to? I think those bathroom baskets are CHEEZY!!
- Wedding favors- really? Cmon, I'm not 21 any more.
- the right band-"ummm, yeah, those guys aren't good if they are available." huh? every body's getting a cut of the cake on the "it" bands, and the band is kind of important, so we are at their mercy. It's been kinda ugly watching everyone hash it out.
So you can see where I am going with all of this, but don't worry. Mama didn't raise no fool. And I'm not marrying a fool either. We are blessed enough to have the opportunity to be able to do it this way, but we will not let this get out of hand.
For me, it is more about the marriage than the wedding and I have no doubts that it will be a memorable, beautiful event without getting fleeced all the way to the altar.