Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Meanwhile, Over At the Hen House

Overheard at my water cooler yesterday.

  • What did Sandra Bullock expect? He was married to a PORN star?

  • Who the hell does Kate Gosselin think she is?

  • All I have heard for three days is the incessant drone of the FOX news channel. I'm beginning to think Bill O'Riley is sexy.

  • Navy blue and black is the new black.

  • The guacamole is the good fat. The six hundred chips you ate with it are the bad fats.

  • How could your a*s look fat in those skinny jeans?

  • What am I making for dinner tonite? Reservations. hahahaha!

  • Tolani scarves are the must have accessory of the spring. "They are all so gorgeous, how can I choose just one." Serious...

  • Is this "March Madness" thing a reference to the big winter clearance sale at Bloomingdales?

  • Do men curse more than women?

  • The Kevyn Aucoin mascara is the BEST EVER! (the item is sold out, but I have it and I'll ship it!! Contact me at )

  • Let's meet after work for a few Margarita's and our own brand of March Madness! Hell yes, look out!


Mrs. Holly Hall said...

meh! I've give it to Kate, I mean, girls gotta earn a living. Hope she lightens up a bit and then she can stop drawing pity from everyone.

Pam anderson on the other hand. I just hang my head in shame over her performance. I've never called a woman the s word before but . . . .

ok good visit at the hen house!


Jim said...

Can I be a rooster in the hen house?

Was he ruined for life by marrying a porn star?

At least Kate got her hair fixed . . . and she was honest about why she's on a show with "stars."

There ARE other channels.

The Rays are the new Yankees, for me.

Lol . . . so if I order the dbl. bacon cheeseburger and a Diet Coke, I'm just kidding myself?

No accounting for taste. They always remind me of squeezing sausage into a casing.

Mmmmm . . . I feel like Legal Seafood tonight. Or something prepared at Wegman's.

My only problem with scarves is when men wear them, without a coat.

No, it's to the shredded state of everyone's formerly sensible bracket picks.

F*** yes. But when your people curse, it really turns my people on.

I bet "Kevyn" wears scarves without a coat.


Heff said...

Curse Holly Hall ! Pamela Anderson is a VISION OF ALL THAT IS PURE !

Anonymous said...

Just gotta love some great 'water cooler'. I work in an office that is mostly women...gossip, gossip,'s an art form here. (and great fodder for my blog).

Anonymous said...

water coolers never chnage do they?

SkylersDad said...

This is exactly why I miss working in an office!

Joker_SATX said...

You have a very scary Water Cooler! I tend to stay away from those.....

Dr Zibbs said...

You HAVE to start a Twitter account about this. It would be huge!

I'd read these all day.

If you do, let me know and I'll promote you.

RW said...

I am the only one in the office 80% of the time; buying lumber, scheduling estimates, reading blueprints and writing proposals. The other 20% of the time it's just the boss and an occasional installer. They speak Polish (I'm here to deal with the gringos). I do not understand what they're saying at the water cooler. Maybe this is a good thing...

Cora said...

I work with kids, so no water cooler talk for me. I get juice box talk instead. Thusly, I know more about Pokemon than any 37 year old woman ought to. *sigh*

Scope said...

I wish people in my office stood around in the break room and talked. Instead, they sit in there cubes across the aisle from each other and talk about the relative merits of round vs. flat strings for base guitars, how to ship a bike to France this summer so you can ride a section of road that will be in the tour, and how to pirate movies. Same 3 topics. Everyday. For a year.

Sadly, I have a hard time working with headphones on.

Chris@Knucklehead! said...

Poor Sandra, I'm taking it upon myself to mend her broken heart.

(That's a teaser for tomorrow's post on my site)

Scott Oglesby said...

HA! You could do nothing but these posts and keep me coming back. The best one… “How could those skinny jeans make your ass look fat?” That is freaking priceless. Have you ever gone to Overheard in New York? Just google it if not!

the walking man said...

Candace you have just made me glad that roosters talk less.