Friday, January 25, 2013

Bad Joke Friday



Jack woke up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s Christmas party. He didn’t even remember how he got home from the party.
As bad as he as feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw was couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table.
And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sat up and saw his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looked around the room and saw that it was in perfect order, spotlessly clean.
So was the rest of the house. He took the aspirins, and cringed when he saw a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.
Then he noticed a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:
“Honey, breakfast is on the stove. I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!”
He stumbled to the kitchen and sure enough, there was hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son was also at the table, eating.
Jack asked, “Son, what happened last night?”
“Well, you came home after 3 A.M, drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”
Confused, he asked his son, “So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??
His son replied, “Oh THAT! Mum dragged you to the bathroom to clean you up, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, ‘Leave me alone b*tch, I’m married!

9 comments:

Heff said...

I KNOW that morning feeling. Some mornings I wake up feeling like a puppy that pissed and missed the newspaper.

MarkD60 said...

Good man!

MarkD60 said...

I copied the joke and picture to my Facebook page.

SkylersDad said...

That is a line that every man needs to memorize!

the walking man said...

If having one women is trouble why would any fool want to try and juggle two or more?

Cora said...

He's a keeper.

Jack Napier said...

.....Said no married man EVER!

Justsayin.....

R. Jacob said...

That is called a one time get out of jail card. Never again!

Dr Zibbs said...

Ha!