Thursday, June 14, 2012

It Can't Be That Bad, Can it?



Funny True Happenings To Make You Laugh on Thursday
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000 USD. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from tree hugging onlookers. A minute later, in full view, they were both eaten by a killer whale. 

A psychology student in New York rented out her spare room to a carpenter in order to nag him constantly and study his reactions. After weeks of needling, he snapped and beat her repeatedly with an axe, leaving her mentally retarded.

In 1992, Frank Perkins of Los Angeles made an attempt on the world flagpole-sitting record. Suffering from 'flu he came down eight hours short of the 400 day record, his sponsor had gone bust, his girlfriend had left him and his 'phone and electricity had been cut off.

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking his arm in two places. Until that moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Two animal rights protesters were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.

There now. Your day's not so bad, is it?


4 comments:

BamaTrav said...

I unknowingly walked into a porn shoot where they were filming 18 lesbians, got a hard on and tripped over a lighting rig and fell into the heap of naked women on the floor, ironically, I screwed the all.

Heff said...

It's FUN to laugh at the misfortune of others, ain't it ? lol.

the walking man said...

I think Bama made that up. everyone knows porn shoots are all closed sets.

Here's one for you in 1950 the population of the nations fifth largest city was 1.7 million people. Today Detroit is bankrupt, can't get out of its own way and is 15th with a population of 713,000. And now averages more than 1 murder a day with a police force to population ratio of 1-334.

But compared to being run over by hogs when protesting their use for food...yeah my day is better than that.

SkylersDad said...

I have heard those stories before, man I hope they are true because they are awesome!