Thursday, November 18, 2010

Pop Culture Poop

Today my head is spinning with a whole lot of useless poop and I'm thinking about things that don't really matter in the big picture. Why do I do that? I'm intelligent enough to know that these things are not important, yet I still wonder about them.


Tony Parker cheated on Eva Longoria and now they are getting a divorce. It doesn't really have any bearing on things that really matter, like the Gulf oil spill clean up or world hunger, yet I can't help feeling awful for Eva. I'm even villanizing Tony Parker in my head and I don't even know the whole story. Apparently the whole celebrity obsessed world is villanizing him too, because I heard a woman on the radio say that when you cheat on your woman you loose, "hot points". So Parker lost some "hot points" with the public and some serious image points too. I'm also feeling a bit duped. (because its all about me) I thought they were such a cute couple who looked so in love. And now I'm thinking Tina Turner was right all along. What does love have to do with it when there is lust and text messaging?


Some people are up in arms because Bristol Palin has made it to the "Dancing With The Stars" final. They claim that Tea Party zealots have found a way to hack into the voting system to ensure that Bristol stays in the competition. Some guy in middle America even shot his TV with a shot gun because he was so frustrated that Bristol did NOT get booted off the show. Really? And I care about this because??? Yet, here I am wondering if the Tea Partier's are going to take Baby's trophy and give it to Bristol. I'll bet Levi Johnston is sorry he cheated on that. Could have racked up a ton of "hot points" with the public sitting in the audience week after week, smiling and pretending he was her proud baby daddy.


And I'm thinking these things.

After watching last night's episode of Glee, I'm thinking about Gwenneth Paltrow, singer? She played a substitute teacher who took over the glee club while Mr. Shue was sick and she was singing and dancing. Then I think about her new movie, which comes out next month, where she plays a country star who's just about ruined her career with drugs and alcohol. Singer? She's pretty good too. How does this new title for Gwenneth play out in my head? Actor, Mother, Activist, Singer??? Then she goes and steals the spotlight at the Country Music Awards last week. Poor Carrie Underwood, this was a golden opportunity to garner more Google search celebrity power points and Gwenneth went and crashed the party and stole her crown.

You see how my deranged mind works?

If I were a great philanthropist, or a famous economist, I would be thinking about ways to reduce our deficit or lower the unemployment rate. Or maybe what special interest group would benefit from an infusion of my cash. Instead I'm thinking about how Wills and Kate are going to afford a splendid wedding, on a mere $68 million dollar budget. The Queen's probably going to have to cancel the company Christmas party to pinch pennies or hock a few of the family jewels if she gets desperate enough.

Where is my mind these day?

While I can't claim to not being able to put together an articulate and intelligent response when having a serious conversation about global warming, the smart money is on the chance that during that all important discussion about world climate issues, I may interrupt to ask you what lipstick you are wearing.

21 comments:

Scope said...

I think the Queen may sell the naming rights to the wedding to help raise cash. Even our transit system is trying it.

I'm certain Sir Richard Branson would be able to slap the "Virgin Bride" logo all over the festivities.

wigsf3 said...

I'm a person who has always hated Tony Parker. Basically, he gets on my nerves in a myriad of different ways. First off, he plays for the Spurs and well, my favourite team ain't the Spurs. Second, he looks like a little weasel man. Third, he thinks he should be allowed to rap... in French. Only thing worse than rap is rap in the romantic languages. (If you want to hurt somebody, force that person to listen to Italian rap. Torture.) And most of all why I hate Tony Parker, he's French.

But today, I'm going to defend him.

WHAT?

Yup, that's right. Today I'm on the Tony Parker team.

You see, Tony Parker isn't a normal person. He's a celebrity. He doesn't live on Earth. He lives in Celebrity Land. And in Celebrity Land, the rules of social and moral decency are different from those here on Earth. In Celebrity Land, marital fidelity isn't wrong. Sure, for people like you and me, Earticans, It's wrong. Those guilty of it should be placed in the stocks and have tomatoes hurled at them. But for celebrities, it's okay. Eva Longoria, being a celebrity should know this and should not have any recourse against Tony Parker.

I now await the onslaught of criticism from anybody who reads my comment.

Scott Oglesby said...

You’re blessed. At least you don’t have the endless cycle or
1- time to write my book
2- better check my email
3- better check Facebook
4- Where the hell did the day just go

like I do. I need someone to mail me Ritalin.

Lisa said...

i'm gonna wanna know where you got your shoes if you try to talk to me about real life issues. ;)

RW said...

I don't know, considering the tone level and content of the "issues of the day" the stuff in your head doesn't sound anywhere near as weird.

Heff said...

I agree with wigsf. Celebrities don't live in the "real world", and their malfunctions will continue to happen over and over again, because they don't live by rules. Bastards.

Joker_SATX said...

I keep tabs on the Celebrities just as a reminder that my life really isn't so fucked up as I think it is...

They help me with my perspective....

sybil law said...

Sometimes, my brain needs to focus on the stupid shit like that simply because my mind needs a BREAK from any real stress/ worrying about real issues.
So don't feel bad.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Scope- Sir Richard is the king of Virgins....promotions.

WIGSF3-Tony Parker is a stupid fuck. Sorry.

Scott-I dont know whether its call blessed or blissfully distracted.

Lisa-I like your shoes too!! I'm sure.

Thanks RW- coming from you that meake me sound somewhat normal.

Heff-Yep. Bastards, all of them cheaters.

Joker-you are a very wise man, my friend. There may be a ring of truth in that for myself.

Sybil-Sometimes I need a break from my celebrity obsession to focus on the real issues. So I don't feel bad. :)

The Dental Maven said...

Yeah, hard to imagine planning a wedding these days within the confines of a 68 million dollar budget. Poor kids.

BeckEye said...

All that was missing from Glee were the subliminal "Go see Country Strong" messages. I guess there's no reason for subliminal messaging though, when you're being blatant about a promotion.

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