I am never eating again.
What is it about holiday's and long weekends that make us think we can just indulge in every food offering that is presented to us? And who in the HELL do I think I am, Twiggy???
Today I am all strung out on cheeseburgers, hot dogs, potato salad, chips, salsa and dip. It's like crack with calories. And the leftovers??? Holy temptation. I can't stand to look at it. I've been on a weekend bender.
No, no, no, I wanna make myself go to rehab.
Chicken, sausages, cookies, dips with veggies and crackers, these are my drugs of choice and they're going to kill me and all the hard work I've been doing getting ready for summer. The smell of the grill triggers my taste buds and suddenly I'm thinking; what's one little hot dog among friends?
But it's never one little hot dog, is it? One little cracker with cheese turns into ten. "Oh you have to try my homemade guacamole." Then the guacamole finds it's way onto my cheeseburger. Dirty smack pushers, all of 'em.
I can feel my body craving more and more and then I begin to sweat and shake all over. The pressure to conform is killing me. Look, everyone else it doing it. It's no biggie. Friendly summer cook-outs are a rite of passage, a time to bond with family and friends sharing good times and good food. It's all a big fat lie.
The truth is, it's good for nothing but a lifetime on the hips.
I'm a junkie. I was born into the addition and I'm a highly functional, as I always bring something to the table. Check out my addition to the barbecue. PURE EVIL.
With all this food leftover, what do I do? Pawn it off on my children, so they can end up with a $50 a day habit. Their innocent little faces asking for more. I have hit rock bottom.
Just say no to crack.