Candy's Daily Dandy Comment Content Comedy Hall of Fame

I am pretty new to the wonders of having my own blog. I started The Daily Dandy on the last day of August 2008, as a place for my unemployed butt to go and write everyday so I could hone my writing skills. 2.7 months later and ridiculously, almost everything I see or hear becomes potential fodder for my blog. Most mornings I am rushing the kids and My Guy on their way out of the house just so I can get to my beloved bloggersphere. Here the world is truly my oyster.

At first I wrote simply and for myself. I was experimenting with this new entity for my ideas. I told no one and (as all writers do) I fell in love with my words in written form up on the screen. I got no comments and I didn't care. I was happy just writing. Then it happened. I got my first comment from a blogger, Miss Liddy. She gave me those few words of encouragement and a question or two and I was inspired to work harder, knowing someone was listening. (Thanks Lids, you will always be my BFF and where ever you blog, I will follow.)

I have learned and laughed so much by reading all your blogs, especially you Zibsy;) the blog master extraordinaire. Some day's it takes me longer to read all your blogs and comment on your amazing content, than it does to post my own blog. But it's THAT important. Thank God I don't have a job!!

By now we can all relate to how the comment is like the crack that keeps us junkies going, so I decided to try out the Comment Content Comedy Hall of Fame. I say, "try" because I'm not quite sure if I get enough traffic on my blog for this to work.* I may need some help with this with shout outs from Poobomber or Zibbs sites(If you guys are interested. Hell, I spend way too much time on their blogs as it is) but give a sister a chance and implore all your favorite bloggers to come over here and nominate a comment for consideration.

The Comment Content Comedy Hall of Fame works like this:

1. Post a comment in the comment section of this blog post with only the name of your blogger Hall of Fame nominee and the link to your site where his/her comment is posted. You may nominate more than one blogger for consideration, but their comments had better be knee slapping hilarious!

2. I will retrieve the comments (maybe you will too) and, depending on the response I get, whittle down the nominees and post the top ten on Monday. The post will be up all weekend, the deadline is 12am Sunday, Nov 9th. That should give you plenty of time to come up with the good ones and get the word out.

3. If all goes smoothly, on Monday, after I post the top 10 for consideration, I will post a ballot on the Daily Dandy's sidebar and we will ALL choose the winners.

I will go first and give you an example from my short list of legendary comments:

I wrote a post entitled: See Buddy. The url for that post is: http://candysdailydandy.blogspot.com/search/label/See%20Buddy

Slyde from Slydesblog said:

Slyde said...
the dog is just being framed by the white man...

HAHAHA! Pure gold! Great job Slyde! I swear your comment had me giggling all day.

So there you have it! The FIRST nomination for the Candy's Daily Dandy Comment Content Comedy Hall of Fame! Good luck Slyde baby!

Who knows, maybe I'll even make up one of those award-thingy's that people can post on the side bar of their blog. Wouldn't you want to be the #1 Comment Content Comedy Hall of Famer, proudly displaying it for the entire bloggersphere to see? (Peebs, can you show me how to do that?)

*once again, the magnificent Prof. Zibbz has provided me with the answer to this question. thanks Zibsy-love Eliza.

*oh yeah, I try to keep my blog as family-friendly as possible. I don't mind racy content, but overly obscene content may be edited and profanity written with ***'s.

Random crap you didn't know about me and don't really care about for that matter.

Among my numerous talents, I have this uncanny ability, while watching a TV show or a movie to recognize a B-list actor's face and somehow place them in a previous role. It may take me a few moments, but I always figure it out. My Guy sometimes challenges me on it, but I am very rarely wrong. And I have been right about some pretty obscure ones too. I know; it's a gift, and it happens to me all the time. Has this happened to you?

Case in point: I was watching CSI:Miami last night. The episode was about this big time mob boss Joey Salucci and his revenge for the accidental death of his daughter. Yada, yada, yada, so I'm looking at the guy, Joey Salucci, and listening to him and my mind kicks into the, "where have I seen him before" mode. I couldn't tell you what heck was going on in the episode, cuz all I could think about is, "I know I've seen this guy in a movie before".

My mind was busy getting all kinds of messages from the karmic world. The information my brain was receiving told me he once played a whiney, wimpy little dude with more hair and he was possibly crying for mercy and begging for his life. I think about his accent, detecting a slight Boston drawl, and begin to try to place him in famous Boston based films. The Departed? Mystic River? Nothing. The grainy images of the whiney actor began scanning through my mind, much like a CSI finger print as it is run through KODIS, looking for a hit. SCANNING......NO MATCH FOUND. Dang.
Anyway, I finish watching the episode and leave to go to pick up my son at hockey practice. As we arrive home and come into the garage, I am walking into the house when the answer hits me! Beverly Hills Cop! That's it! That's the movie! Damn, I am good!!!!

The actor's name is James Russo and he played Mikey Tandino in the original 1984 Beverly Hills Cop film. Remember? He was Eddie Murphy's best friend who was murdered in the beginning by Victor Matlin's thugs for stealing some kind of bonds? His death was the reason Axel went to Beverly Hills to investigate. Yup, got all whiney and crying right before that really ugly guy shot him. Russo has been in hundreds of other films like Lethal Weapon 3, Donnie Brasco and Fast Times At Ridgemont High, all of which I have seen, but his Beverly Hills Cop role is what came to mind. Weird. Oh yeah, I was wrong about his accent too. He is from New York not Boston, but close enough.
I told you this happens to me all the time, so I just want to share this last thing with you and since you really don't care anyway, what the hell.
One time My Guy and I were in Vegas at the Venitian. We go to sit down at one of the black jack tables and I look at this pretty blonde woman sitting across from me and I feel a flicker of recognition. So, of course, without thinking, I say, "You look familiar to me. Do I know you?" I should have known from her reaction, (which was to immediately loose her smile, break eye contact with me and turn away, in the form of a response) because I later figured out that she wasn't someone's random mother from the PTA like I thought. She was a movie version of an iconic figure from my childhood. She was this woman.

Hail to the Chief

Barak Obama
White House
Washington, DC
USA

Dear Mr. President-Elect,

Hail to the Chief! Congrats to you and yours on a magnificent Presidential win. Now that it is all behind you, I think you'll probably be sleeping like Santa after Christmas day. I wanted to be one of the first ones to wish you good luck on the tough road ahead. I know you of all people know that it's not going to be easy. The best part about today, the day after your win, is that there is no more, "your side, my side,"what's left is the hope that we are all on OUR side. I think our country could handle a large dose of that.

There are just a few things I wanted to ask of you. Could you try your best to be a legendary leader? If anybody can do it, you can. Keep us safe from terror domestically and take our troops home so that we don't loose any more of our great men and women. The time has come.

Make us proud. Proud that we have made history in this great country by choosing our first black president, not just for the color of his skin, but for the power of his message. Let your commanding oration be a beacon for all that is possible in this world.

Lead by example and choose your advisers wisely. Never, even once, compromise what is right and good for the sake of being popular.

Show the world the resiliency of our powerful nation and help us to get out of this financial mess we are blanketed in. I don't expect miracles but where you lead I will follow, trusting that you will point us in the right direction.

Be a man of integrity. Both home and abroad. Teach us how to be a father and husband, all the while maintaining the most important job in the country.

Most of all, be safe. There are alot of crazy people out there who are NOT happy you won the election. I will pray for your saftey against ignorance. Thank you in advance for putting your life on the line for us every day you are in office so that we can be inspired.

God bless and godspeed,
Thanks for listening,
Candy

See Buddy

See BUDDY.

BUDDY is an energetic, sweet, over zealous, white boxer.

See BUDDY'S school bus.

BUDDY goes to school on Monday's so he can socialize in a large group with other over zealous dogs. Let's just say that yesterday was NOT a good day at school for BUDDY.

See BUDDY'S mug shot.

BUDDY is in the clink facing a possible 10-20 on multiple charges of statutory rape and aggravated sexual assault on more than a few of his female school mates.

Bad BUDDY, bad dog!

Political Science

I make it a rule never to discuss politics with people I don't know or trust as a result of a bad experience. BUT-the other day, my guy (an Obama man), recommended I take a shot at this:

The Obama-Biden tax calculator and I found it quite interesting. At first look, I thought this tool to be a by-product of partisan politics, so I did a little research. The information used to create the tax calculator was compiled in a 36 page report by an independent, non-partisan group at The Tax Policy Center. Both candidates have their own version of this tool, but Obama's is the only interactive one.

I'm sure by now most of you have seen the tax calculator on one or both of the candidate's web site's. If you haven't, and you're skeptical of it's politics like I was, it's worth a look. Click here to view either the full report or a summarized explanation of the tax credit study.

I decided to seize the moment and utilize our basic democratic principles to try an experiment. So, in honor of to today's political climate and in the spirit of "let's throw it against the wall and see what sticks", click here: The Obama-Biden Tax Calculator and calculate your tax credit under both candidates. It's super quick and easy. Then, for the sake of science, would you be so kind as to come back to The Daily Dandy and take my poll. If you have already calculated your credit then please take part in the poll on the sidebar of The Dandy before leaving.

Thank you in advance for your participation. It should be interesting to see whose S**T does stick...or stink for that matter.

Scenes from a bonfire

EXT. BACKYARD BONFIRE-10pm

Male HOST sits at a backyard bonfire on a crisp autum night with his two guests. GUEST 1 and GUEST 2 are young people in a committed relationship. GUEST 1 is a male and GUEST 2 is a female. GUEST 2 is making smores over the CRACKLING fire, the marshmallow still melting amongst the flames.

HOST: Tonight marks the first time I have allowed my 12 year old son to go trick-or-treating with a group of his friends without parental supervision.

GUEST 1: (Leaning into GUEST 2) Man, when I was 12 on Halloween, I remember getting my first kiss with Debbie Simpson in the back of my best friends garage. Yeah, that's what I was doing at 12 without my parent's supervision.

GUEST 2: (Looking straight into GUEST 1's eyes) Debbie Simpson? That's the name of the first girl I ever kissed too!

Momentary SILENCE as GUEST 1 and GUEST 2, intensley hold each other's stares.

Robust LAUGHTER ensues.

Crack-cakes and other things that go bump in the night.

In the spirit of Halloween and things that go bump in the night, I relay a real story with real characters that go bump in the night.

My girlfriend came over to my house on Tuesday to do some laundry. (she has no washer/dryer) While we were waiting around for the clothes to dry, I suggested we make some cupcakes. ( I'm back on the "crack-cakes" as I call them. They are soo good, I swear they are just like crack-can't just have one. Definitely fodder for a future post; with a recipe) So we whipped up about 2 and a half dozen of cakes, she finished her laundry and went on her way, crack-cakes in hand. Yesterday, while talking to her on the phone, I asked her if there were any cup-cakes left at her house.

She replied, "I had to take what was left into work. I have been eating them in the middle of the night."

To which I responded, "Are you still night eating?"

I had to laugh. She has been telling me for a few years now how she thinks she eats in the middle of the night. She has no recollection of the actual act of eating, but wakes up occasionally with gummi bears clenched in her hands or with wrappers strewn about the kitchen counter that weren't there when she went to bed. Once, she was having a conversation in the morning with her boyfriend when he suddenly asked, "What the hell is all over your mouth?" When she went to the mirror to inspect, she found dark, chocolate rings around the corners of her mouth from what she later deduced had been from night-eating more than one ice cream sandwich.

I know it is terrible to laugh because apparently this is a real affliction that affects 1 to 2% of the population. But I couldn't help but think it hilarious- shame on me. I have even seen this on Oprah or Dr. Phil once or twice, so I cannot claim ignorance on the subject.

According to Albert Stunkard, MD, of the University of Pennsylvania’s Weight & Eating Disorders Program, "People who fall prey to this syndrome are not simply indulging in a bad habit. They have a real clinical illness, reflected by changes in hormone levels.” Night eating syndrome, as it is called,was first described in 1955 but has only been recognized by the medical community since 1999. Wikipedia states, " to be considered a bona fide disorder, this pattern should continue for two months or more." Research also suggests that night eaters also have a preference for carbohydrates, which trigger "feel-good" neuro-chemical production in the brain. The theory is that it is an unconscious attempt to "self-medicate mood problems and relieve stress."

Apparently she has gained a few pounds over the past couple of years, but nothing alarming as her night-eating episodes are few and far between. Thank goodness for her.

So on this All Hallows Eve, when night has fallen and the house is quiet, except for a thump from the kitchen. Beware... it could be your, spouse, significant other, or roommate indulging in a little self medication. Happy Halloween.

ps-this picture is of my little pug, Jingles. Her expression reminds me of that famous 70's quote from a bumper sticker, "I'm so happy I could just S--T"