Bye, Bye... Miss American Idol

It was announced today that the next season of American Idol, the 15th season, will be it's last. It is the end of an American institution, to be sure, but I think we can all agree it is time to put this one out of its misery. First debuted on Fox in June 2002, American Idol created a sensation from the moment the first episode aired. 

American Idol once was a national obsession. Years ago, myself and several other bloggers would write re-caps and enjoy handicapping every minute of the Cinderella story played out in real time. I used to LOVE to watch Idol every week and root for my favorite talent to win. It was a family affair, as we would all gather together to enjoy the excitement of Idol. It was magic, watching everyday people become singing sensations each week. Thorough it's tenure, Idol has produced two bonafide recording stars; Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood. Then a string of 11 almost stars, some more forgettable than others. American Idol introduced us to Simon Cowell, the celebrity judge we all love to fear. If Simon said something, one was hardpressed to forget it and his advice helped launch the careers of many aspiring stars. 

The judges, they became like family. A cuckoo, crazy family with a stern father (Simon), a beautiful but dizzy mother (Paula), a groovy big brother (Randy), and the voice of reason. (Ryan) Then they got too famous...the judges almost became the focus more than the talent. There was fighting within producing staff...it was documented that the franchises marquee talent-Simon Cowell- wasn't happy and was looking elsewhere. Then Paula left and then Simon left and no matter who they replaced them with Idol was never the same without Simon.

Is that when Idol jumped the shark? 

Possibly, but my guess is it jumped the shark some where in between Season 4 and Season 8. Too many talented folks elimated early-conspiracy theories abound-and America's favorite show never quite rebounded. The hand writing was on the wall, yet it soldiered on, banking on America's belief in the dream. They bled that franchise for every dollar it was worth and they weren't smart enough to stop the bleeding. They hired new celebrity judges-big names with big followings-they changed the format countless times, yet Idol never delivered the goods after Season 4. They never delivered another true American Idol. 

In the end, we enjoyed it for what it was worth-but nobody like a guest who overstayed their welcome. 

Bye bye American Idol. Your time has come.

You Go Girlfriend!!

A self proclaimed "Bravo-phile", it has been well documented here that my TV almost exclusively broadcasts the Bravo network when I find myself in front of it. So it should be no surprise that while on my recent 15 day-unauthorized vacation, that suddenly I had some rare personal time on my hands. Thank God for my iPad, because actually sharing the family room TV with my family can get very tricky. Since I needed to catch up on what all my favorite Housewives were doing, I downloaded the GENIUS Bravo ap and discovered my entire guilty-pleasure-viewing world at my finger tips!

It was within that world that I decided to start watching Bravo's first scripted series "Girlfriends Guide to Divorce". The show is promoted constantly during the Real Housewives franchise and stars Girlfriend Lisa Edelstein as Abby McCarthy, an acclaimed self-help author and family guru who lives in LA. Edelstein is a brilliant choice considering I loved her as the long suffering girlfriend of curmudgeonly doctor House of the 2004 long-running TV series bearing the same name. "Girlfriends" was one of my best binge watches to date. Season 1 is comprised of 13 interesting episodes.

Now before you say anything negative, let me clarify a few things:

• I am EXACTLY the demo Bravo wants; over 40, educated, self employed career woman who is divorced with two children. Safe to say the show speaks to me.
• Abby McCarthy (Lisa Edelstein) and I are nearly the same age and living somewhat the same life-not really-but I am sympathetic to her character and the parallels are numerous. 
• Add marriage, divorce, sex, money, fashion, family and powerful women and I'm in.
• The series first premiered on my birthday. Need I say more?

To those who say that Bravo and it's reality TV franchises are partly responsible for the "dumbing down of America", I say here is a smart and sexy, scripted show that just may teach us a thing or two. 

It's powerful. It's funny and compelling while being heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time. And if you've ever been through a rough patch in your life or have a girlfriend who has, it manages to mirror your own personal story only with better fashions and better scripts. It's also one of the best season finale episodes I've watched in a long time. You don't have to be a girlfriend to watch it either, I think the story lines are compelling enough for anyone watching to find a relatable angle. 

Bravo, Bravo! Thanks for giving us finally Girlfriends we can depend on. 

Ghost Writing

So you all know I watch those zany Real Housewives, as I have said before, they are my favorite guilty pleasure. I watch them all. Much to my delight, Real Housewives New York debuted last night and the antics started immediately. Back are almost all of the women (minus LuAnne) and the fireworks begin when Aviva begins talking about her book deal. Aviva was the one housewife everybody had a problem with when we left them last season, so it was amazing to me that she spent the first episode making amends for her bad behavior and then the second episode destroying all that hard work.

But this post is not about that, per se, this post is about what happened when Carole and Aviva engaged in what is now known on social media sites as #bookgate. Quick history: Carole Radziwill is a journalist by trade, and has worked in the news media and magazine world for what she says is 20 years. She calls herself a "writer", claiming "that's what I do" and she has written 2 books, one which reached the New York Time Best Seller List. Aviva Drescher is what one could call a true NY housewife, who according to Carole, "never had a job outside the home". The second season drama is over Aviva's book deal with a publisher and a lunch between Aviva and Carole where the topic of ghost writers came into discussion.

A ghost writer according to Wikipedia " is a writer who writes books, articles, stories, reports, or other texts that are officially credited to another person." 

Sounds interesting, and if you think so, read on. Aviva and Carole discuss the topic of using a ghost writer. Neither claims to have used one, and then things get hairy. The awkward lunch takes a turn for the worst and Carole takes offense at Aviva's intimation that she used a ghost writer on her first book. Aviva then goes on a gossip campaign, telling all of the other Housewives that "her publishing house told her that Carole used a ghost writer on her first book"  A lot of back an forth takes place, but what sticks in my mind is Carole's objection to the whole topic of ghost writing. Carole has a real point here: she is a career journalist. She has built that career working for news organizations, writing for magazines and working in the field as a journalist for many years. Her books stand alone and her pedigree is impeccable, so I stand behind her when she feels that her reputation as a writer is being called into question. She has earned the right to be called a professional in her trade.

Aviva is a housewife of several wealthy men (not at the same time), and now a reality TV star whose personal story of triumph (she had her leg amputated at a young age in a horrific accident)  is inspirational at best. She was well educated an evidently academic enough to score a book deal with a professional publishing house.

What's the problem ladies? OK, I understand Carole's objection to Aviva telling the entire WORLD on TV that Carole used a ghost writer when she didn't. According to me 'dems is fighting words, and its dirty pool when you try to discredit someone's career. But Carole is not without fault. Because Aviva is not a "journalist" it's not to say she can't become a "writer" and that the idea that she could sit down and write a draft for a book on her own absurd.

Here's what I mean: I have a Master's Degree in Journalism from Boston University. I have this daily blog that I have pretty much written every weekday for 7 years. Before that, I worked briefly writing in local news and TV. Does that give me the right to call myself a writer? Do I need the pedigree of a paycheck from a news organization or a national magazine to lay claim to that? And if not, can I never claim to be somewhat of a writer? What about all those people out there who extensively journal every day, write short stories or blogs? Are they fraudulent "writers" too?

I'm not sure I understand this whole thing. Who has the right to say who a writer really is? I don't deny that hard work and career accolades are definitely constitute a profession. But does that mitigate someone who puts a pen to paper or a finger to a keyboard.......then hits the publish button?

Bad Weather Stew

Are you kidding me?

This time they got it right. No beauty emergencies today, that's for sure, so it looks like a lost day of revenue. I just made that FAB, slow cooker beef stew you see up above and I'm hunkering down for a day-long blasting of snow.

• The beef stew I made is from a blog called Butter with a side of Bread. I have made it before and let me tell you, it is just about the closest thing to perfection on a day like today!

• My Guy was out last night, so it was a Real Housewives of Beverly Hills MARATHON> Those bitches are so juicy...always fighting and swearing. It feels like home when I watch it! No wonder I love it so much. I'm half kidding, but really, after the latest episode, I was left feeling pitty for the ladies. Yes, they get paid a ton of money per episode and they have attained some twisted form of celebrity, but they fights and the petty drama that goes on makes me wonder about the toll it takes on their real lives...they have to fight to stay relevant or they get axed! I guess it no different than any other job except their bad behavior is rewarded.

• I bought a coat for my dog. Yes, I did and you know what? He needs it! He's an old fella. (we're not quite sure how old exactly-pound rescue) And his little Jack Russel body is slowly shedding hair. He doesn't mind his little velcro coat, it's bright orange and waterproof and as a matter of fact he kind of likes it! He has taken to wearing it around the house on really cold days. But on days like today I'm wishing I bought one for Buddy too. ( See Buddy here- it's funny. He's my Boxer)

• Tequila? A no no for Candy. Went out for My Guy's birthday on Sat night. I think I had a good time. 

• Since I'm  stuck at home today, I've decided it's the perfect time to study. I'm in the process of putting together The Candy Bar's E-Commerce site and I've been doing a ton of research on social media and online presence. It's very interesting and very motivating! So the good news is the day won't be a total loss! Happy Hump Day Bloggers!

I Was Just Thinking...

So have you heard about this thing?

It's called a SlingBox and I'm thinking about purchasing one. Slingbox works with placeshifting technology. Placeshifting technology allows you to watch your own, paid for programming from anywhere in the world using your laptop, pc or smartphone. Sounds cool huh?

Using Slingbox software, users can, get this: view live and recorded content, pause, record, fast forward and DVR all of their favorite recording from wherever they are IN THE WORLD! It even works in the same household, which gets rid of the need for a second cable box and or subscription.

I like it! My Guy will love it! He's a technology freak and this thing is an amazing piece of incredible technology. It turns any computer, tablet or smartphone into a second TV, with your own programming at your fingertips. So what's the catch?

It's pricey..

There are two models:
Slingbox 350- $179.00-which gives you pretty much all you would need, delivering your paid for programming in HD.

Slingbox 500-$299.00- which does all that and allows you to add and archive your own videos and photos.

As a Father's Day gift, this thing is going to be a huge hit! And I'm thinking My Guy will have an absolute field day playing with this thing. I should probably get the 500-
Do any of you own one of these?
What do you think of it?

Help me out here-
Which one should I get bloggers??

Useless Tidbits

• So there were two Powerball winners, one in Arizona and one in Missouri. Some people have all the luck. I'll just keep telling myself that 500 million dollars would have screwed my life up anyway. Right?

• I was watching the XFactor last night and I have decided that Britney Spears is either dumb as rocks or on some serious drugs. The chick is seriously off, like really off. Sad. 

• Seriously disgusted by this story. Quick recap: Young couple from New Hampshire allegedly beat and burned the young girl's 3 year old son so badly that the doctors feared he was blinded. About a week ago they dropped the child off at a local hospital and took off. The child is fighting between surgeries, and expected to make a long recovery. The authorities found them yesterday in, get this: Universal Studios in Orlando. 5 Words: (and they aren't nice words) HUNG. UP. BY. THE. BALLS.

• Frick told me something interesting when she was home this weekend. She, being a freshman in college, just got to see her old high school friends for the first time this school year over the weekend. She told me that quite a few of them started smoking. I found this interesting because my theory is this: these kids live a sheltered life. Even though they do a hell of a lot more than I think they do, they've probably never been exposed to many smokers. What do you think?

I Was Just Thinking....

What is it about a cat fight?

From an early age, our mothers taught us to act "lady like". Well, most of our mothers, but it was sort of an unwritten rule that a girl should act a certain way. They told us to act demure, speak softly and if we had a point to make, to speak succinctly and assuredly, so as to get our point across. Be eloquent and make people listen to our logic, and above all always keep our emotions in check. At least in public, for one would never want to be considered one of "those girls".

With the dawn of the new Millenium, social media and reality TV, those social mores, taught by years of mothers before us, have basically gone to the dogs...or the cats, because in this day and age, it's the "cat fight" that gets the attention. By today's standards it's the squeakiest wheel that gets grea$ed, and "those girls" are fast becoming reality starlets with publicists and posse's to prove it.I'm not saying this is the way to go, either. What I am saying is that it's a fact that a cat fight translates into TV ratings and magazine covers, and why?

Take for example the Real Housewives franchise. Bravo built an entire TV network on cat fighting, bad behaving, supposed "housewives" who look to have it all and then some. But that wasn't good enough or interesting enough, and the Bravo exec's quickly realized that it was the most controversial housewives, the ones who made those cringe worthy moments happen, that the viewers really wanted to see. They wanted to talk about their bad behavior on social media sites and in blogs and fan the flames for more bad behavior.

Probably the most notorious example of a  Real Housewives cat fight moment was when controversial New Jersey housewife Theresa Guidice famously flipped a table. It was the flip heard around the world.
This clip is NSF and contains expletives.

Theresa then  went on to become even more famous with her "Fabulous" empire of cookbooks and products, and she continues to cash in on her notoriety today. Look at NeNe Leakes from Real Housewive Atlanta. She's parlayed her bad girl, no nonsense, "oh no she didn't" image into a full on Hollywood acting career.

But before the bad behavior on Housewives, there was the man who built his image and fortune on cat fights.  In 1991, a then almost unknown Jerry Springer launched "The Jerry Springer Show". I'm sure the intention of the show's original premise was good info, interviews and discussion, but it's producers soon realized that the shows about tawdry, controversial subjects were leading them to much higher ratings and bigger revenues. 22 years later, the show is simply nothing more than a cat fight boxing ring, complete with bells going off and hair weaves and wigs flying.

With topics like. "You Stole My Man and Then Had His Baby!" and "Bad Girls Oiled Up", it's just a matter of minutes before the fist-a-cuffs come out. Security is present, but they are more like the referee's in the ring, "keeping it clean". Springer even admitted in 2000 to Reuters in an interview, "I would never watch my show. I'm not interested in it. It's not aimed at me. This is just a silly show." Yet he cashes those silly checks.

Is the phenomenon of good girls gone bad enough to keep this detrimental behavior alive in the public eye? The answer remains to be seen. But one thing is for sure. I am part of the problem, not the solution. As long as I continue to watch these train wrecks happen, they will continue to produce them for my/our viewing. And I'm not quite sure how I feel about that.

A Telltale Sign That I Have Way Too Much Time On My Hands

Get paid to watch TV? Where do I sign up?

While in NYC with my BFF, she showed me this new app called Viggle that actually earns you rewards for watching TV shows. Really? Really. Viggle users can accrue rewards points while watching TV shows that are redeemable for premiums. They are offering gift cards for Starbucks, Amazon, Burger King, iTunes and many more with your redeemable points, and things like free monthly subscriptions to Hulu and Spotify and even big ticket items like a MacBook Air or a Kindle.

Viggle uses some kind of software sound recognition, like a Shazam app, that actually listens to what TV show the user is watching. By "checking in" to a specific show, the user is awarded points depending on how long they stick with it. Half hour shows, are awarded 30 points and hour long shows, like CBS's Person of Interest are 60 points, and if you change the channel  into the show, your total is then knocked down to 10 points.

But, these days, with the Olympics, I have been accruing over 100 plus points a night with the lengthy Olympic coverage. There are also daily bonus shows where you can earn extra points for watching. Last night, the Olympic was 100 point bonus, plus 185 points for the Track and Field and Beach Volleyball coverage( I was late for check in). The nightly bonus shows are clever way to get viewers to watch something that they normally would not watch and sometimes it's even enjoyable. There are also nightly Viggle Live games that earn points for answering questions about the featured shows. The challenge for me seems to be to wrack up the most points I can on one given day. And who doesn't love a challenge? All for doing something I'm going to be doing anyway?

This morning I received 75 bonus points for watching a 60 second Pepsi Ad, and I'm wondering if I will accrue extra points for each time I watch that ad. (I'll keep you posted) In two days, I have accrued over 3000 points, which puts me a quarter of the way to 9000 points for a $5.00 Starbucks reward card. For 18,000 point I can earn a $10.00 Sephora egift card.

But the truth of the matter is this, I don't do it for myself. You know who came to mind immediately when I was shown this "Watch TV, Earn Rewards" Viggle concept? My kids, of course.

 Maybe now, I'll be able to share with them the fruits of my TV labor. I'm certain these are rewards that they can fully understand.

Monday Mashup

• Yooouuuuuukkkk! We are going to miss you buddy. Always good for a big hit, the consummate Red Sox, your funky stance in the batters box was legendary. Thanks for the memories and the two World Championships you helped us get. You will always be welcome here. I don't believe any of the crap they are dishing out. When they say it's not personal, it's business, don't believe them. Valentine didn't like you. Salute to the skipper! Love you dude, Godspeed in Chicago. 

• Obama is in my hometown today! He is digging up cash for his campaign from the Richie Rich's that live in this town. Holy blue state! No check writing Democrat wants to forget that Gore lost New Hampshire in 2000. Obama's peeps are taking note and leaving no electoral vote stone unturned. If you've got $18,000.00 you too, can sit with Barry and Michelle for dinner. Any takers?

• Clint Eastwood's 18 year-old daughter is having sex with her boyfriend. Thank you Mrs. Eastwood and Company. I'm sure her father is thrilled that now the entire E watching world knows that.

• One week down in Uganda, and I haven't heard a word from Frack. They told us that no news is good news. I guess.

• Did Dr Oz just jump shark?And if he did I'm pissed about it. He has teamed up with Montel Williams to endorse these weight loss supplements and when I saw Montel on his show, Dr. Oz immediately lost credibility. So Montel is in great shape and he has written a few diet and exercise books, but isn't he the same guy who can get you a short term, cash advanced loan? Why should I believe him now just because Dr. Oz says so? I'm not buying it and Dr Oz just fell off the"his word is law" pedestal.

Too Real

I dreamt last night that Adrienne and Paul Nassif were overnight guest in my home. That's probably because I watched the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on Bravo before I went to bed. It's quite possible that I dreamt about them because I can most relate to the Nassif's, more than any of the other cast members on the show. They appear to be somewhat grounded, which is more than I can say for some of the other cast members.

Where do I start?

Let's start with Brandi Glanville. Bandi is the ex-wife of scumbag, cheater, actor Eddie Cibrian and the newest member of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast. Ever since Cibrian cheated on Brandi with country singer LeeAnn Rimes, his life is pretty much been the toilet. Save for the fact that his new wife LeeAnn's flush with cash, the guy would have no luck it weren't for bad luck. There's no denying that Brandi is smokin' hot! But on the end of "smoking hot" I feel I have to add "skank". I'm sorry, but the chick's a skank and there's really no better adjective to describe her. I also think she's using drugs more than frequently, a fact that she does not try to hide. But dang, I got a give her credit, I want to have her body when I come back in another life.

Then there's Kyle and Kim. Two sisters who are the blood related Aunts to Paris Hilton. At one time, in her youth, Kim was Disney royalty, but like most child stars, her fall from grace has been hard to say the least. Kim's a train wreck. She's so obviously abusing substances, that it's almost wrong to watch on television. The excuses, the lies, the lateness and the disappointment that her family endures is hardly tolerable. Knowing now that Kim has entered a rehab facility makes watching this take place even more poignant. Kyle keeps needling Kim and Kim keeps disappointing Kyle and everyone else. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what's going on here. Yet the entire cast only hints about the fact that something is wrong and they continue on with their scripted shooting schedule, so that everyone can make a paycheck.

The tragic figure of the entire cast is Taylor whose husband Russell committed suicide just days before September 5 Real Housewives of Beverly Hills television preview. That's too Real. These are real people dealing with real issues that are both serious and tragic. Last night we saw Taylor in the throes of the aftermath of the end of her marriage. Even her therapist told her to get out. He came right out and said, "You can't live like this any longer. It's time to make some tough decisions." We now know the result of that marital breakup; Russell suicide. There were allegations that some serious physical and mental abuse was taking place and there is a child involved.

The stuff is all too Real.

And we watch their lives play out in front of us on television for our personal entertainment. TV executives who exploit these characters and give them a vehicle to showcase their drama make millions and become celebrities themselves because they make Real their business.

I feed right into that business. I buy what they're selling hook, line, and sinker because we, as a whole, LOVE to watch. My dad always says," If you lived in a cul-de-sac and brought all of your problems into the center in a trash bag, then you put that trash bag into the middle with everyone else's problems; you'd sure as shit pick up your own problems and run." I think the Nassif family is benefiting from this way of thinking.

Because like the MTV show that trail blazed the way for all others always said, "to find out what happens... when people stop being polite... and start getting real"

Wikid Real NSFW

Ok so this is way too good NOT to share.

All I have to say about this is while the sports worship is completely accurate, we don't really sound like that.

Do we?

Ridiculous? This Is For The Birds

He's baaaacck...

Animal Planet has a new show entitled, "Taking on Tyson" and it's not about the Iron Mike we have come to know. It's a kinder, gentler Tyson. It's Mike Tyson, the competitive pigeon racer.

In the immortal words of Mike Tyson himself, "That's ridiculous."

"The first thing I ever loved in my life was a pigeon," he said. Legend has it that Tyson got into the boxing game at the tender age of 11 when a neighborhood bully killed one of his beloved pigeons. Now a washed up but not washed out ex-champion, Mike Tyson has taken up pigeon racing for this new chapter in his life. Cue the Rocky 5 opening sequence, where this real life story parallels the fifth installment of Stallone's Rocky story. Sort of.

Pigeon racing, which is popular on the rooftops of New York, sends pigeons out into the Pennsylvania skies, marked with electronic bracelets which time their departures and arrivals. Tyson is the fresh, tattooed, faced rookie who has a veteran pigeon racer/coach to show him the ropes, and the veterans of the sport are not one bit intimidated by this Mike Tyson.

Part docu-drama, part sport, this six part series brings Iron Mike back to his childhood roots in Brooklyn, where Tyson says there are more than a few bad memories. Clean and sober for years, Tyson seems to have found happiness amongst his beloved birds. "If I'm lucky enough to die an old man, I'm gonna have birds," Tyson says.

Which is just so ridiculous. Unless you live in Mikes world.

Sei No Evil

I missed Glee last night, so no FAB recap today, but did you see this?

Click the play button, I'll wait.

That was the "live" shot just outside the Grammy's and the reporter, Serene Branson, obviously struggling to speak, is now saying she suffered a seizure during a live shot when she was reporting from the Grammys on Sunday. Sources report that immediately following the garbled report, she was fine and received a check from paramedics at the scene, but experts are saying otherwise. Some believe that a deep rooted medical problem may be to blame for the incident.

Some speculate this was caused by a mini seizure and others wonder if it was the result of a slight stroke, brought on by prolonged exposure to bright and sometimes flashing lights. One thing is for sure, she couldn't wrap her brain around the words she needed to speak.

Having been in front of the camera once or twice in my life, I can speak from experience when I say, adrenaline, nerves and inexperience could be the culprit here. Let's just say, for the sake of argument, that this was her first "big shot" at a live shot. In her mind she had her career riding on this 15 second moment in front of the camera and she knew it. Panic and his evil cousin Anxiety might have chosen just that moment to wreak havoc on the poor woman, and once you open the floodgates to those two, the result could look something like this. If you've ever experienced a panic attack, you know exactly what I mean. I'm just sayin. This is my theory, cuz I've been there.

There are those who would say that to explain this away by diagnosing this as a simple panic attack is dangerous and reckless at best. I am certainly not a medical doctor nor do I play one on TV, I'm simply implying that if an extensive medical check up provides no evidence of a serious, underlying medical condition, that common condition called anxiety could be to blame. Look at all those "Funniest Home Videos" that show brides and grooms on their wedding day, garbling their vows and speaking in unrecognizable language. Some even fainted from the anxiety. It's a possibility.

I hope for Serene Branson's sake that this is the case, because I think at one time or another, we've all been there in some way.

Nobody Puts Baby In A Corner

I have a confession to make.

Last week, I told you that I kill a lot of my down time at night watching the idiot box. I have my set schedules and my favorite shows and if that wasn't bad enough, I pretty much never deviate from the norm because I DVR what I missed and watch those shows in the breaks in my rigid TV schedule. Well, last night I found myself on my elliptical machine at 8pm which is highly unusual for me. I try to cram that in the AM so I can make time for couch time, but yesterday was busy. So I decided to watch the #1 show on television, or so it has been said, "Dancing with the Stars", while drowning out the sound with my beloved ipod and my Glee play list.

A former dancer myself, (it was my minor in undergrad) I figured watching the celebs ballroom dance would be fun if I didn't have to listen to the crap they talk about. ABC's Dancing with the Stars has been on for quite some time now. I don't know how many seasons, 9 or 10, but I have NEVER watched an episode. EVER. I have seen a routine here and there, but My Guy is almost always with me on the Killing Time Couch, and I think he'd rather have all of his teeth extracted than watch Dancing with the Stars. I always thought the show was redonk, because I know about what goes on, (ie: who wins, who's banging who, etc) due to my devotion to the weekly rag magazines. I figured that was good enough for me.

I was wrong.

And I'm pissed at myself because NOW I'm hooked. I'm such a sucker for glamour. The one who impressed me the most was Jennifer Grey. Granted, she has an advantage because she studied the art of ballroom dancing for her role in the iconic movie,"Dirty Dancing", but that was hundreds of years and a few noses ago. A full fledged adult, no longer a "Baby", Jennifer looks nothing like the character we rooted for in the movie. It's like she's someone else. Her career killing nose job shot her into obscurity years ago, and now she's back for a stint on "Dancing". I had to now pull out my ear buds and shut off my Gl-iPod, to watch this woman shake it like she once did.

I was so impressed to find out that during a routine check up for the ABC show, it was discovered that Jennifer had spinal cancer. Four surgeries later and a lot of rehab, she was cleared to perform in the cast with restrictions. She cannot do lifts or tricks. Now in complete remission from the deadly disease, she credits "Dancing" with saving her life. Ironic that cancer was what killed her former "Dirty Dancing" co-star, Patrick Swayze. We know Jennifer has one heck of a guardian angel on her shoulder.

Jennifer is paired with last year's champ, Derek Hough, and I couldn't tell you what kind of a dancer he is because, again, I never watched the show before last night. BUT I can tell you that this lady, Jennifer Grey, is HAWT!! Holy smokes, she can move and groove and has got curves and bumps in all the right places. And she's got rhythm. The lady's got it all and she's sexy as hell! I couldn't help but smile as I watched her command the dance floor. And I couldn't take my eyes off her. Who was she dancing with again? Whatever, the point is, this lady is worth a looksie.

If you are a fan of dance. If you are a fan of the show. If you are a fan of Dirty Dancing. And if you are a fan of hot, sexy women, watch as Jennifer Grey captivates you with her own brand of sexy magic like she did so many years ago. I promise she won't disappoint and I predict this lady catapults her career in Hollywood 10-fold if she wins this thing. Just like Patrick said in the movie, "nobody puts Baby in a corner."

Oh yeah, and the other people on the show were good too.

Killing Time

The older I get the more I feel like I'm just here, killing time. Somedays, I look at the clock and it's already half past the day and I feel like I got nothing accomplished. But then again, what was it that I really set out to do? Good question.

Anyway, when the dinner table has been cleared and the dishes have been done, I know what it is I set out to do and that's watch a little TV and get lost in a fictional reality. It's really one of my life's simpler pleasures. And this week is a doozy! Premier week! All of my favorite shows are back and better than ever.

Let's take a look at my weekly viewing schedule:

MONDAY: 8pm, House on Fox. I have watched this show since it's inception. I love that curmudgeon Dr House. He's so intriguing.

Last night I watched the new Fox show, Lonestar at 9pm on Fox. I really liked it! It's about a young, handsome con-man living a double life. His problem is his greedy, dangerous father, played by David Keith.He's the guy who starred in "An Officer and a Gentleman" as Sid Worley, Richard Gere's best buddy who killed himself. Good stuff. This show could be big.

10pm, CSI:Miami on NBC

10pm,Weeds on Showtime. I never quite make it to 10pm so I DVR this one and watch it on Tuesday's before Glee.

TUESDAY: 8pm, Glee on Fox. DO I really need to say how much I LOVE this show??? Tune in on Wednesday for The Daily Dandy's Full Glee recap. Huge fan.

8pm, NCIS on CBS. Nothing can keep me from Glee on Tuesday nights, so I usually wait until Wednesday to watch NCIS on On-Demand.

WEDNESDAY: Nothing on Wednesday has really caught my attention, so here's where I catch up on the Kardashians, or watch whatever else I haven't seen on the DVR yet.

THURSDAY: 9pm, CSI on CBS. This used to be the best show on television, but it's played out and old. Ever loyal, I continue to watch because I love the characters and I am now invested in their plight, however old it may seem. BUT, CSI still has some magic left in it's top hat. Every once in a while it blows me away with an episode. That's why I still watch it.

FRIDAY AND SATURDAY: It's either date night or Dateline NBC night. Sometimes those true crime stories keep me awake at night, and sometimes the kids watch it with us and usually its a good lesson to teach them about the sickos in this world. Or we'll watch a movie.

You'd think I could find a better way to kill some time, right? Like read a classic book or a magazine like the New Yorker, right? Or knit my family some scarves, hats and mittens for the winter. Last time I checked, the only magazine that comes to my house that gets read immediately is the US Weekly.

Yup, the older I get the more I feel like I am just here, killing time.

Jersey Chic

Is everyone from New Jersey ridiculous?

It seems like this is what the Reality TV world would like us to believe because the residents of that fine state just keep playing it up getting more and more redonk as time moves on. Case in point; The Cast of the Jersey Shore, MTV's latest reality series about a group of over tanned, over worked out, over accented 20 somethings who live together and "have their lives taped to see what happens."

Truth be told I have never seen one episode of this crapola, and yet I know who The Situation, Snookie and the rest of the gang are. Why? They are the punchline to a million and one jokes. And they are clueless-ly ridiculous. And they are all over every tabloid magazine, their every move scrutinized. And they are laughing all the way to the bank. I heard on the RADIO (see I can't even get away from them in the privacy of my own car) yesterday that they just wrapped up their Miami season, which is airing soon, for which they all received a $10 K raise per episode. Only to be asked to resume shooting immediately back in New Jersey at the shore for the third season.

What's funny is the cast is now holding out for more money per episode because they are rolling in it right now, being paid by night clubs that are standing in line wanting them to promote their clubs. They'll get their raise, too. Not too shabby for a group of Jersey townies whose claim to fame is GTL (gym, tanning, laundry).

Then there's these bitches...

The Real Housewives of New Jersey make being bad look good. Not really, but they are like the biggest train wreck that you can't stop watching. They are so bad that one of the housewives quit the show because she no longer wanted to be associated with the villian of the group. And who could forget the infamous table flip? I believe that will go down in Housewives/TV history. Danielle Staub, the housewife who is most hated, has turned gay? Only time will tell, as she breathlessly tells the cameras last night. Yet I can't wait to find out, as much as I hate myself for admitting that.

These ladies live in their own Jersey world and speak their own Jersey speak and each of them lives a charmed life. So they want us to believe. Table flipper Theresa is rumored to have filed Chapter 7 bankruptcy yet we all know she's making bank fighting Danielle for the cameras. I'm sure she's doing it for the well being of her family. Housewife Jacquline has been deleted from the Mother of the Year ballot, for throwing her 18 year-old daughter to the lions and not having her back.

"It's a very serious situation," Danielle says for the cameras. Ya think?

Jacquine's daughtery Ashley has been charged with assualt for pulling out a large portion of Danielle's hair at a country club fashion show turned brawl. She says she was protecting her mother, whom she thought was hit by Danielle. That same mother who brought her daughter to that fashion show and then kicked her out after the altercation telling her to "go home Ashley." Jaquline then waited by the crying victims car and I'm not sure why.

If that were me. I know for a fact my daughter would have been pinned to the ground by me until I got her into the car and drove her ass out of there. Then she would have never left the house again. I'm just saying...All that crazy play for the cameras is one thing but if my child gets involved all bets are off. What is wrong with these people?

Not all Jersey-ites are like these people. I know because one of my best friends, my college roommate hails from West Orange, NJ. She is the anti-Jersey compared to these bimbos. Educated, classy and articulate and intelligent. The only problem is you can never quite take the Jersey completely from the girl.

It always rears it's ugly head when she orders a simple CAAAWFEE, or coffee as it's known everywhere else in the world.

Who Died And Made You Judge Judy?

Lately my mom has been spewing forth "Judge Judy-isms" like they are common law. She watches the female curmudgeon regularly in the afternoon and has even watched the show together with my children. What cracks me up is that mom thinks that what Judge Judy says is law. Evidently more than a few people agree with my mom, because the Judge Judy show is the afternoon TV ratings leader. She has even beat the Queen of Daytime, Oprah in the ratings and since it's inception, the show been nominated for 13 Daytime Emmys.

So what makes this woman tick and who the hell does she think she is treating people the way that she does?

According to Wiki, Judith Sheindlin was a former family court judge with the reputation as one of the most outspoken court judges in the country. The domino effect of fame began for Judge Judy when she was featured in an article in the Los Angeles Times in February 1993. The article led to a feature on the TV show 60 Minutes and after the success of that appearance she was approached to host her now titled show; Judge Judy. During the 14 year tenure of the Judge Judy American court show, Judith Sheindlin has become the 13th richest woman in entertainment in our country, beating out celebs like Ellen Degeneres, Giselle Bunchden, Christina Aguilera and Cameron Diaz to name a few. She even has a star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame.

I'm sure you've all seen and heard Judge Judy's tirade's on a plaintiff or defendant in her courtroom, as nobody can reduce a human being to a paltry commoner like Judge Judy. And don't you dare lie to her...the response to one she conceived to be lying, "You mess around with me young lady, I'll wipe the floor with you. We follow each other?" She's regularly throwing out some of her famous wisdom, my favorite being, "Beauty fades, dumb is forever." The message here is Judge Judy will whoop your ass iffin she thinks you a liar. Plain and simple.

As beloved for her strict no nonsense approach as she is, Judge Judy is not without critics. Surprisingly one of her most vocal critics is Judge Joseph Wapner who starred in the original American court show, The People's Court. Judge Wapner presided over cases for TV from 1981 to 1993. The two have previously waged a battle of words in the papers with he most recently saying, "She is a disgrace to the profession. She does things I don't think a judge should do. She tells people to shut up. She's rude. She's arrogant. She demeans people. If she does this on purpose, then that's even worse. Judges need to observe certain standards of conduct. She just doesn't do it and I resent that. The public is apt to gain the impression that this is how actual judges conduct themselves. It says 'judge' on the nameplate on the bench and she's wearing a robe."

Judge Judy's response to Wapner was, "I refuse to engage in similar mud slinging. I don't know where or by whom Judge Wapner was raised. But my parents taught me when you don't have something nice to say about someone, say nothing. Clearly, Judge Wapner was absent on the day that lesson was taught." Which is ironic...

Because Judy gets paid to do just that.
Maybe she should take her own advice. Or, maybe not.

You're Hired!

It was down to the final two. Holly and Brett. Brett and Holly.
Who would best the other and take home Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice crown.??

Who was left but one tough mother and a reinvented creative rocker, both vying for a quarter of a million in cash for their named charity. It was a long, hard-fought season with this bunch of celebs and it was not without drama.

Highlights:

• Cindy Lauper: She was the biggest celeb in the bunch, as her name always translated into easy $$. The women on her team complained about her unorganized and "weird" ways of completing a task, but the truth is, every thing she touched turned to gold. I think she might have gone the distance if she hadn't tried to be "the nice one".
• The boardroom: Always the best part of the hour and a half episode. This group had the art of "bus-throwing-under" down to an Olympic sport. It was always juicy in there. Sometimes you could see that The Donald, himself, was not sure who to fire, but inevitably someone always showed their true colors and Mr. Trump went right for the jugular.
• The Trump Children: Never too far from their dad's shadow, something tells me that's exactly where they want to be. Ivanka and Donald Jr. were the eyes and ears for Mr. Trump's celebrities and they did not disappoint. The Donald raised his children well. Both are articulate, charming, tough, corporate and in control...and neither is hard to look at. In a world where over privileged, moneyed celebrity children line the walls of drug rehabs, Trump successfully instilled the family business ethic in his two oldest. You have to give him kudos for that.
• Comraderie: It was heartwarming to see the likes of disgraced ex-Govenor Rod Blagojevich bonding with former Pro Wrestler Bill Goldberg and MLB super-star Daryl Strawberry. It seemed like the men's team, Rock Solid, formed some lasting relationships with each other.
• Brett Michaels: Much like Cindy Lauper, Michaels unique creative genius coupled with a "every man" charm worked in his favor and highlighted the reason the Poison front man has staying power in the industry. You couldn't not like this guy. Then, Michaels was hospitalized with a serious, life threatening brain hemorrhage, and the fans of Michaels waited and watched for days as the prognosis could have gone either way. Michaels recovered, despite the odds, and was expected to make a full recovery. Then last week, he suffered a "warning stroke" putting his appearance at the live finale in jeopardy. But Brett Michaels is one tough cookie and against doctors orders he literally put his life at risk to appear in the boardroom one last time.

Congrats to you Brett!! WAY. TO. GO!
Now go home and get some rest and take care of yourself!!

The world can wait for your next move.

Guilty Pleasure

Here's a Daily Dandy first! I swear, I'd never believe you if you told me, and I NEVER, ever thought these words would ever come from my mind, realm or stratosphere, but....

I'm really worried about Brett Michaels condition.

Latest reports have him listed in critical condition in ICU at an undisclosed hospital following a brain hemorrhage at the base of his skull. I am worried for Brett and I am pulling for him and his family. Seriously, I have grown quite fond of Poison's front man because I must admit to my latest guilty pleasure....The Celebrity Apprentice.

Yes, that Celebrity Apprentice.

Thanks to the magic of On-Demand (and too much time on my hands), I'm all of a sudden hooked on the show that they call "the most absurd reality show on television". And Mr Brett Michaels has earned my respect. Aside of all the cat-fighting, back-stabbing and "bus throwing under" that goes on on that show, Brett has not participated in any of the former and has pretty much done everything that has been asked of him and done it well. Granted, the dude has a strange way of getting to his point, and some have criticised him for wasting time getting to the point, but he has made it all work, and in most cases, ended up doing all the work.

Brett was pegged from the first show as the "weak" one by the ladies team. It's the so called "weak" ones who you have to watch out for. He has mastered the art of turning his way-past-it's-prime, 15 minutes of 80's fame, into dollars and sense and in the process made himself a Reality TV star with tons of fans. Female fans. You gotta watch those rockers, they have the edge, I tell ya.

I'm throwing out my prediciton that he won the whole thing.

I hope he's going to be ok, because I think he may just be a good human. He portrays himself as a aging rocker, but he has revealed a super soft spot for his young daughters and his family. I hope he pulls out of it soon.

Get well Brett. Nobody can Rock the boardroom like you.

Boob Jenner, er um, I mean, Bruce Jenner

I had planned on writing different post this morning, but I've got my tail feathers in a cluster over last night's "Keeping Up With The Kardashians"/The Wedding, 2 hour special, which I just so happened to catch on TV, and I'm ready for a good rant.

I want to begin my rant by acknowledging the fact that that this Kardashian/Jenner family are the largest assembly of despicable, selfish, self centered, mean spirited people I have ever seen on TV. This, of course, is the sole reason they are a ratings bonanza for Ryan Seacrest Productions. Not usually a fan of the show, I will admit to catching their antics on occasion and have even posted here about my disdain for this TV debacle, in the beginnings of my blogger career. And, like a good hypocrite should, I find myself watching this train wreck every now and again. I also can't get away from the recent tabloid fodder that is the Klohe Kardashian/Lamar Odom wedding that took place super speedy last month. Which was, interestingly, paid and filmed, by and for, the Kardashian's reality TV show.

But the wedding crap is not what I'm upset about.

I'm pissed about Bruce Jenner and why he has allowed THIS to happen to him. I'm talking about how this one time American Hero is treated by this gaggle of vile women who are his so-called family. Truth be told, Bruce Jenner jumped shark when he became the recipient of the worst plastic surgery job ever, but I can't say Bruce's Olympic glory was lost on my inner sports fan. His 1976 gold medal decathlon victory solidified his status as an American sports icon forever.

But a gold medal does not make him a rocket scientist.

I'm saying that Brucey needs to be responsible for letting these hags walk all over him and make him look like the complete boob that he is. I got a little insight to Bruce Jenner last night and he gained, almost but not really, my admiration, and most certainly, my pity.

I'm not sure if it's a gag for the TV cameras, or the way things have always been, but Bruce, it seems, is always odd man out. They are constantly scheming behind his back and doing those outrageous things that they do, only to get foiled in the end by Bruce. Kinda, because they make it clear that they really don't care what Bruce thinks. It's as if he is their moral compass, but these ladies would rather be lost in the world of immorality.

Last night was "the wedding" show. Probably a ratings scheme, the wedding had to be planned in 10 days and the entire family was in on the planning except Bruce....As a matter of fact, Klohe didn't even want to tell Bruce, until she got her ring. Which happened to be two days before the wedding. Meanwhile Captain Oblivious, and his bad hair, is walking around the house while his wife and children are plotting, I mean, planning a huge wedding he knows nothing about. Then, while watching TV with his step-son Robert, he hears ON THE NEWS, that Klohe is engaged to Lamar Odom, a guy he has yet to meet. Bruce is, understandably upset.

There is not one ounce of respect shown to Bruce by this family. Klohe hardly introduces Lamar to Bruce at a dinner before the wedding rehearsal, and she lets him know how she really feels about him when she chooses her brother Rob instead of him to walk her down the aisle. Of course, the drama is played out during the rehearsal dinner, when Bruce stands to speak, uninvited, before everyone. He begins by talking about Klohe's dad, Robert, and what does he do? He cries. So does everyone else (except Klohe). But, one can tell he speaks from the heart, and here's where Bruce does the most honorable thing. After years of being walked on by these little bitches, he tells them that he promised their dad he would take care of his girls, and he ask Lamar to promise to take care of Klohe. Unbelievable.

I have to say, the dude must really love his wife and kids despite the way they treat him, because the Kardashians are not worthy of the love and devotion of Bruce. After the rehearsal dinner, a few hours before the scheduled wedding, Klohe finally asks Bruce to walk her down the aisle. He, of course, accepts because why would he want to ruin his sucker streak now? And we are supposed to be touched by this. I can't help thinking that it was planned for Bruce to walk her down the aisle all along. In fact, I'm thinking the whole Bruce in the dark thing has to be a ratings ploy. No self-respecting man would endure the treatment Bruce gets from his family for nothing. There has to be some zeros attached to his portrayal in this show.

The upside of all of this is that thanks to "Keeping up with the Kardashians" an entire new generation of people know him by name again.

The down side is they know him as Boob Jenner.