Stick The POTUS Fork In it

I am so done with this election.

I am so glad that after today it will be over. If I see one more Elizabeth Warren or Scott Brown political ad on TV I'm going to sucker punch someone.

At this point there's nothing more to say and nothing more to do except to exercise your right as a registered, over the age of 18 American and go and vote. That's it. We will let Democracy do the rest of the talking.

May the best man win.

A Bunch Of Crap I Could Have Written Full Posts About But Didn't

• I fell asleep during the debates last night. What the hell is wrong with me? Shouldn't have had that second glass of wine;). Heard it was a sleeper anyway. Romney made Obama look like a little girly man and that was early on, from what I saw. What's your take on last night's debate? Did it change your vote?

• The Red Sox (I can't believe I'm going here) are done for the season. Stick the long awaited fork in them, FINALLY. You haven't heard much about them this season at The Daily Dandy, and there's good reason for that. They truly sucked. I don't think I have watched a full game since late July. The calls for Sox manager Bobby Valentine's head have been heard loud and clear, especially today. If I were him, I'd be looking for a quick way outta town. (if he hasn't left already)

• For all you dog lovers out there, check out this story: "Susie" a cute, white, female poodle mix, was hit by a car in Taunton, MA and immediately became wedged in the front grill of the car. The driver, unaware that he had struck a dog, continued driving for another 11 miles. He even crossed state lines into Rhode Island with Susie still stuck in the front grill. When the driver became aware that the dog was stuck, he drove to the nearest police station and the dog was immediately removed. Unbelievably, the dog sustained a concussion and  only minor injuries. Susie was recently reunited with her owner. I gotta ask, how do you not know that you've struck a dog with your car?

• I love this best of all....This is Carter, who uses a wheelchair. His dad made him this for Halloween:

The Politics Of Life

So Frack started asking me about the issues in this election. What I found so interesting was that he seems to be forming opinions about political parties and political posturing. He asked me specifically about taxes and what Obama has done and what Romney claims he will do. I didn't quite have the answers for him, and I'm realizing that we both need to be more informed.

The one thing I could tell him for sure was that partisan politics has never been more divided than it has at this moment in recent history and that the crux of this problem lies in the House and the President's politics. When the two can't agree to look over party lines, real damage can be done and not for the good of the people.

What can I tell him and how can I help to mold his political opinions when I myself, do not affiliate with any political party?

So I told him I vote for the man. I told him I listen to the issues and I try to focus on the ones that matter to me and my family. I'm a small business owner, so I listen when they talk about that. I am a tax payer, so I am concerned about where my tax dollars are going and whether or not they will increase or decrease. I have a family and I'm concerned about their health and well being. I want to know that the government cares about them too. And I told him that change comes in small doses and that it's important to give back to the community.

I'm in awe of his 16-yr-old political curiosity.

I hope I am doing him a service by spewing forth my very own brand of politics so that he may someday become politically responsible too. It's certainly something I thought about but not to the extent that I need to now. I owe it to my son and to the future of this country.

Monday Mashup

• Yooouuuuuukkkk! We are going to miss you buddy. Always good for a big hit, the consummate Red Sox, your funky stance in the batters box was legendary. Thanks for the memories and the two World Championships you helped us get. You will always be welcome here. I don't believe any of the crap they are dishing out. When they say it's not personal, it's business, don't believe them. Valentine didn't like you. Salute to the skipper! Love you dude, Godspeed in Chicago. 

• Obama is in my hometown today! He is digging up cash for his campaign from the Richie Rich's that live in this town. Holy blue state! No check writing Democrat wants to forget that Gore lost New Hampshire in 2000. Obama's peeps are taking note and leaving no electoral vote stone unturned. If you've got $18,000.00 you too, can sit with Barry and Michelle for dinner. Any takers?

• Clint Eastwood's 18 year-old daughter is having sex with her boyfriend. Thank you Mrs. Eastwood and Company. I'm sure her father is thrilled that now the entire E watching world knows that.

• One week down in Uganda, and I haven't heard a word from Frack. They told us that no news is good news. I guess.

• Did Dr Oz just jump shark?And if he did I'm pissed about it. He has teamed up with Montel Williams to endorse these weight loss supplements and when I saw Montel on his show, Dr. Oz immediately lost credibility. So Montel is in great shape and he has written a few diet and exercise books, but isn't he the same guy who can get you a short term, cash advanced loan? Why should I believe him now just because Dr. Oz says so? I'm not buying it and Dr Oz just fell off the"his word is law" pedestal.

LINsane In The Membrane

You shoulda heard all the hoopla. All weekend long it was all most TV, radio and newspapers could talk about. Jeremy Lin was returning to Boston, home of Harvard, where he began his basketball ascension to greatness. You couldn't miss it. Heck, I even got caught up in it all. Who doesn't love a great Cinderella story like Jeremy Lin's?

Boston Herald Sports scribe Ron Borges put Linsanity into perspective for me with his Sun morning Page 8 article in the Boston Herald. Borges wife, a Taiwanese American, and her family, including his 5 year old son, described how Jeremy Lin and his recent NBA success has "rekindled and old flame". Suddenly, yesterday's game was more about Lin and less about the Celtics.

What's even more amazing is that in a place like the Boston Garden, where Celtic greats like Bird, Cousy and Bill Russell were worshiped and glorified, and where 17 World Championship banners hang in the rafters, and where it's storied parquet floor has played host to some of basketballs greatest rivalries and where Celtic fans bleed a proud and deep green, the crowd was cheering a hometown cheer when ever Jeremy Lin touched the ball in the opening minutes of the game.

Now that there is some powerful Linsanity!

Let's not forget that this guy has been Lin-sane for only about a month now, and has revitalized a New York Knicks team that was literally flat lined. Dead. In the time since his Feb 2012 emergence that made him a household name, he has led the Knicks to winning streaks, major media coverage, and been on the cover of Sports Illustrated twice. To say that Lin controls the flow of their game is an understatement.

But Jeremy Lin is not invincible, and his play as of late has been humbling. Yesterday was no different. But hard core Lin fan's don't care. Even the big guy himself, the POTUS, Barry Obama who sat down with Bill Simmons, aka ESPN's The Sports Guy, last week. When asked about Lin, Mr. President claimed to have been in on Linsanity long before all of us. Arne Duncan, his secretary of education, was captain of the Harvard basketball team, who told POTUS that Jeremy Lin was one to watch.
"So I've been on the Jeremy Lin bandwagon for a while...I can't take credit for (Linsanity). but I'm just saying I was there early." Obama said.

WOW. The leader of the free world claiming to be a big fan.... Now that's some serious Linsanity.



Simmons entire interview is available on his website Grantland.com

You're Killing Me

So this is precisely why I am in love with Hollywood.

Leave it to them to give me a LOL moment in the middle of all this.

The Distinguished Office Of The American Presidency

Stress.

Constant exposure to daily stress can take it's toll on the best of us. It can cause serious health problems, early heart attacks, deplete the body of essential vitamins and minerals and reek havoc on a healthy body.

You think you've got stress in your life?? Check this out. Leading researchers have recently completed a study on the physical effects of stress and what it has done to the last 4 surviving American Presidents.

The photograph on the left is of the President and First Lady going into office. The one on the right is of them after leaving office.

Any questions?

Today's Special: Are You Kidding Me???

I've got nothing much to say about this one, except that,

YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.

Good thing for him he's a cute little bugger...

I'm BAraCk, Baby!

Dear World,

HA! I'm back, and it feels good. Oh, I know what you were thinking. You were thinking I was a has-been, out dated and "done". That my status as a prime contender to lure the heavy weights was soooo over.

Well, allow me to correct you with a smug little smile. Who's you're daddy now?? And lets make no mistake here, I am soooo back!! Yes, this Sunday begins the worldwide spotlight shining right down on my heavenly little ass, complete with a major player. And I mean MAJOR.

No need for me to name drop here, because soon enough you'll be calling "my people" to even get a meeting with me. CNN, Fox News, ABC, NBC, MSNBC, even that blow-hard Bill O'Reilly's coming to see me and to see The Big Guy. As you know, I've been here before. Yup, back in the good ole days me and Bill, we were like peas and carrots. That's when the world decided I was their sweet heart and everybody put me on the map. And I didn't disappoint, so I'm primed and ready to show the world who I am and what I've got. AGAIN!! Whoo Hoo!

Shit, I'm so chic right now that chic actually called my agent, who called my manager, who called my assistant who explained that Ms. Martha would have to get back to her....If she has time.....If she can.....Is it possible to fit you in sometime next February? Yeah, that's the kind of clout I'm talking about!

I'm so liberal that those Dems and Hollywood types are clamouring to get "all up on me" and bask in my glory. And spend their money. And throw parties for Him. And throw the spotlight on my deserving little Rock. Just like the good ole days. CHA CHING! Ooops, did I write that out loud. Sorry, my bad.

I'll just call the past eight years a rejuvenation period-a time for me to reflect, meditate and contemplate my spiritual journey. I've had a few cosmetic surgeries since then and I am looking as good as those hot, Hollywood actresses that walk my beaches, only better. Oh Jackie, are you up there watching me??? I hope you're proud.

So let this be a lesson to you people. Like they say, ain't nothing over till the fat lady sings!!!

She sang at the inauguration and as far as I know, Aretha is not scheduled to perform any where within my 10 mile by 20 mile ass, so ain't nothing over here. Yeah!

Starting next week, my future's so bright, you gotta wear shades, bitches. Oh, and make sure they are Dior, Chanel or Tom Ford. You wouldn't want to stick out like a sore thumb now, would you???

Love and Hope,

Martha

NSFW Friday

(For those of you who don't know, NSFW means Not Safe For Work)
Hi ho peeps! I've got a crazy day today so I gotta be brief and get right to it.


This is definitely NSFW!!! and something I was thinking about posting a while back but never got around to it. Who knew Eddie Murphy was a clairvoyant?

Have a great weekend everyone!

My Inaugural Address

Today I am humbled. History will be made on this day and we, as a nation, will witness it-together. The time has come for us to put away our differences and celebrate the dawn of hope in our country. The tides of change will sweep our shores clean.

In honor of today's historic inauguration of our 44th president, I will re-post the letter I posted on this site to Mr. Obama the day after he was elected on Nov 5, 2008.

Barak Obama
White House
Washington, DC USA

Dear Mr. President-Elect,

Hail to the Chief! Congrats to you and yours on a magnificent Presidential win.
Now that it is all behind you, I think you'll probably be sleeping like Santa after Christmas day.

I wanted to be one of the first ones to wish you good luck on the tough road ahead. I know you of all people know that it's not going to be easy. The best part about today, the day after your win, is that there is no more, "your side, my side,"what's left is the hope that we are all on OUR side. I think our country could handle a large dose of that.

There are just a few things I wanted to ask of you. Could you try your best to be a legendary leader? If anybody can do it, you can. Keep us safe from terror domestically and take our troops home so that we don't loose any more of our great men and women. The time has come.

Make us proud. Proud that we have made history in this great country by choosing our first black president, not just for the color of his skin, but for the power of his message. Let your commanding oration be a beacon for all that is possible in this world.
Lead by example and choose your advisers wisely. Never, even once, compromise what is right and good for the sake of being popular. Show the world the resiliency of our powerful nation and help us to get out of this financial mess we are blanketed in.

I don't expect miracles but where you lead I will follow, trusting that you will point us in the right direction.Be a man of integrity. Both home and abroad. Teach us how to be a father and husband, all the while maintaining the most important job in the country.
Most of all, be safe. There are a lot of crazy people out there who are NOT happy you won the election. I will pray for your safety against ignorance.

Thank you in advance for putting your life on the line for us every day you are in office so that we can be inspired.

God bless and godspeed.

Thanks for listening,

Candy

Hail to the Chief

Barak Obama
White House
Washington, DC
USA

Dear Mr. President-Elect,

Hail to the Chief! Congrats to you and yours on a magnificent Presidential win. Now that it is all behind you, I think you'll probably be sleeping like Santa after Christmas day. I wanted to be one of the first ones to wish you good luck on the tough road ahead. I know you of all people know that it's not going to be easy. The best part about today, the day after your win, is that there is no more, "your side, my side,"what's left is the hope that we are all on OUR side. I think our country could handle a large dose of that.

There are just a few things I wanted to ask of you. Could you try your best to be a legendary leader? If anybody can do it, you can. Keep us safe from terror domestically and take our troops home so that we don't loose any more of our great men and women. The time has come.

Make us proud. Proud that we have made history in this great country by choosing our first black president, not just for the color of his skin, but for the power of his message. Let your commanding oration be a beacon for all that is possible in this world.

Lead by example and choose your advisers wisely. Never, even once, compromise what is right and good for the sake of being popular.

Show the world the resiliency of our powerful nation and help us to get out of this financial mess we are blanketed in. I don't expect miracles but where you lead I will follow, trusting that you will point us in the right direction.

Be a man of integrity. Both home and abroad. Teach us how to be a father and husband, all the while maintaining the most important job in the country.

Most of all, be safe. There are alot of crazy people out there who are NOT happy you won the election. I will pray for your saftey against ignorance. Thank you in advance for putting your life on the line for us every day you are in office so that we can be inspired.

God bless and godspeed,
Thanks for listening,
Candy