Tuesday Tidbits

• From the "Wait a minute, what?" files: El Chapo Guzman, Mexican drug Kingpin, allegedly threatened Donald Trump via Twitter by Tweeting, “Keep screwing [with us] and I’m going to make you eat your fuc*ing words you lousy white fa**ot,”  Now that would be scary enough, but the unbelievable thing is that El Chapo just recently escaped from PRISON. What the hell? Now escaped convicts are safely tweeting threats? What is the world coming to? Hello Mr. Trump! A bona fide dangerous drug lord, allegedly threatening The Donald via social media. Trump better become accustomed to sleeping with one eye open.

• Ray Donovan Season 3 on Showtime: Best. Show. Ever. The first episode of Season 3 aired on Sunday night and it was AWESOME! I was skeptical because most great new shows sort of start to loose their luster by the 3rd season. The story lines get ridiculous and suddenly it's jumped shark and ratings drop. But this Sunday's Ray Donovan  Episode 1 didn't disappoint, so I'm looking for a great ride down the Ray Donovan rabbit hole this season...

• And speaking of jumping shark: Get this, a great white shark beached itself on a Chatham, MA beach yesterday. A seven foot, juvenile male great white beached itself trying to get a seagull. Witnesses reported that the shark got stranded at low tide and found itself flailing around on dry land where it couldn't swim at all. Beachgoers came to the shark's aid and tried to keep it alive by dumping buckets of water over it in intervals. Once authorities arrived on scene, the shark was towed back to the water about an hour later. Some stated that they thought the shark was dead because it had not moved after it's initial stranding, but once it was towed into the ocean, it flapped it's fins and swam away. Now let's hope that great white learned his lesson and doesn't come back for more.

• Tanorexic: I have a new obsession. Who knew self tan products could be so stunningly GORGEOUS? And simple. Seriously? The new St Tropez self tan products I have in my store, The Candy Bar are by far the easiest and best way to have a natural golden tan without the damaging UVA/UVB rays. The lotions and mousses make application a snap! They are virtually streak-free and since self tan is not an exact science, if you do see a mistake-all that's needed is a re-application over the rare streak to correct it. I'm telling you-I may never be "white" skinned again. I am loving this stuff. 

• Home is where the heart is: Right now I am so enjoying my gorgeous yard. My Guy has seriously done an amazing job landscaping that yard to perfection. He has, year by year, tweaked and pruned and planted so many gorgeous things and it's truly a spectacle to behold. I just had a really nice weekend at the fire pit with friends and it amazes us when we look back at pictures of how the yard used tolook. My Guy has the greenest of thumbs, and for sure he as the greenest of grass. I'm proud to call it my home, but I'm especially proud of him. Sometimes the grass isn't always greener on the other side of the fence. 

Desperately Dirty Housewives...A Repost

*The following is a Re-Post-originally posted on The Daily Dandy on Friday, March 6th 2009. It was one of my favorites then and still is now.

I have led a sheltered, sheltered life. Now bear with me here for a moment and you will understand what I'm getting at.

I stopped by the local quick-mart yesterday to pick up some milk on my way home. The gas station/mini mart is located on the main thoroughfare, no more than .5 tenths of a mile from my street, smack dab in the middle of two affluent, suburban communities. I stop in there regularly; to get gas and last minute items and the staff and I are on a friendly, first name basis. We always take a few moments to chat about daily events, and often times they will share a story or two about what goes on in the quick-mart. Yesterday the story was focused on the amount of condoms that are sold in this particular store. The owner asserted that of the four mini marts he owns; this particular location, by far, out sells the others in condom purchases. He added that the purchases are made mostly by women-who appear to be just like me, apparently-and by that he meant your ordinary, every day mom.

Another staff member then proceeded to tell me about these same suburban women; the ones buying the condoms, propositioning him for a little discreet, extra-curricular activity,*wink, wink*. Now they had my attention. We then discussed it a little more. They said well dressed men in business suits also make numerous condom purchases and we all marveled over the frequency of this taking place in an affluent community such as ours. Who'd have thought? Interesting. Wealthy, successful business men and their lonely, neglected wives.

On my way home, armed with this new revelation, my mind went directly to a memory of a similar sort. About 5 years ago, I was waiting at home for a service man to come to turn on my irrigation system. This is a twice yearly appointment, and the homeowner must be present in order for the service tech to have access to the pump located in the basement. The company always give you a 3 hour window for the arrival of the tech. My window was from 9am to 12. I jumped into the shower sometime close to 9, and sure enough, I heard the doorbell just as I was getting out of the shower. I quickly threw on my bathrobe and slippers, wrapped a towel around my head, and rushed to the door.

I told the tech he was welcome to come in and go find the pump in the basement on his own, but that I would just need a few moments to get dressed before I could show him. The tech immediately put up his hand, beating a hasty retreat from the door and said, "I'll do what I need to do out here first. When you're dressed you can come and get me and I'll come in." OK, fine. I get dressed and go find the guy and walk him down to the basement to show him where the pump is. He then says to me, "I hope I didn't offend you by being short with you earlier. It's just that I have learned the hard way never to enter into a home when the lady of the house is dressed in a bathrobe."

Really. Forever the journalist, I pressed him for more information.

"You're kidding me, right?" I said.
"I wouldn't kid about that," he replied.
He proceeded to tell me the stories about how more often than not, the robe and the towel quickly drop to floor. He said he could write a book about the propositions he's received over the years and that despite his warnings, some of the younger guys he works with have actually messed up their relationships over their indulgence in this offer of an"afternoon delight". I was speechless.

Let me go on record here as being fully aware that this could take place anywhere in the US of A, and it is certainly not limited to affluent communities. I just need to wrap my brain around the fact that it actually does happen in real life and not just in Hollywood.
I have lived a sheltered life, for sure, because this stuff never ceases to perplex me. The service guy? The UPS man? The plumber? Not to imply that there is anything wrong with any of those professions. I just don't equate an afternoon quickie with my major kitchen appliance being returned to working order.
I just don't get it. And I'm glad I just don't get it.
Herein lies the point-these women "just aren't getting it" so they're getting it when ever and where ever they can, on the sly. The allure of the forbidden fruit.

This is just one woman's opinion is all, and to each his own, whatever floats your boat and every other seemingly appropriate cliche. I just think there needs to be some sort of connection, chemistry or history before engaging in the act. Call me old-fashioned, call me a prude even, all I'm saying is that I just think there are better ways to float that personal boat, if that's what you're looking for.
It certainly gives new meaning to the job title, service man.

Spirit Animal

I'm not one to buy into all that Facebook crap about being a super fan of the Brady Bunch and who your Disney princess is. But one night my friend and I were talking about your spirit animal and what that means.

So I googled it and took the quiz.

What did I find out? I found out that I was the Wolf. Sounded reasonable because it tells me that the wolf has a "stealth hunting ability as well as strength and stamina". Family comes first, says the wolf, who forms deep connections with close friends and family members. Also very true. The Wolf is loyal, devoted and passionate which is also me. OK-so I decide to blog about the spirit animal today and I pull up the quiz to read about the Wolf.  

Then what do I do? You guessed it? I freakin took the quiz again.

I got the swan. Huh? I'm not the wolf? I think it's a mistake although the Swan spirit animal has attributes I can relate to. So I Google another, different quiz and I get the Tiger. WTF? Which am I? Now I'm confused as shit because the Tiger also has spirit animal qualities that are totally me. I take it again, because determination is one of my many qualities. This time I get the Wolf. The wolf has 2x going for it.

Now my friend stops by and takes the quiz after I tell him about the mix up. What happens? He gets the Owl. I tell him to take the other quiz to see if it's all a scam, and he gets the Owl again. Now I'm pissed! I make him take it one more time and BAM...he gets the Owl. 3x he's the Owl and he wins the consistency quota.

So I decide to take it again...Bad decision because now I get the Owl! It must be wrong so I walk away from it for an hour or so...Then I take it again...and I get the Owl AGAIN. Now I've decided that it's all a scam and what the hell do I care about a stupid animal quiz?

Bottom line? I'm the Wolf with Owl tendencies since I got them both 3X.      
OK? So now we can all go back to our regularly scheduled lives.
Aren't you glad I figured that out?                                                                                                                                            

Weekend At Mommy's

So how was your 4th? I had the best weekend..

I started my weekend on Thursday because Friday was the observed holiday, so I made my way down to my July 4th destination, Cape Cod, MA. The traffic was brutal brutal, even at 11:00 am but I didn't mind that it took us twice as long to get there. We went directly to our favorite restaurant once we arrived and proceeded to have.....the most amazing.....the summer favorite and a Cape Cod Classic.....a hundred million calories and I just didn't care....

FRIED CLAM PLATTER

And I ate the whole thing. It didn't disappoint because it never does. One by one, (or ten) my family arrived to the Cape house, each one with their traffic story. Seems it didn't matter what time you left that day-there was traffic and lots of it. Once everyone had arrived we went back to our favorite restaurant and enjoyed a huge, family meal-again. This was the start of a trend. A FAT trend as we all ate like we hadn't eaten in months. The drinks were flowing, the laughs were numerous and the evening was a pure joy.

Friday? A picture perfect beach day and we took complete advantage of it. There's nothing like spending the day on the ocean with your brothers and sisters-and the kids. We had a ball. Again-lunch was a smorgasbord of different foods and damned if I didn't indulge a bit in all of them-cuz that's what life is all about right? Enjoying yourself with your family has to be one of life's great pleasures. Friday night was the country club's annual July 4th BBQ and fireworks. We all showered, dressed up and piled into our cars for the ride to the club. When we go there we were greeted by Uncle Sam on stilts!! (who happens to be our favorite waiter from a restaurant at home-his real profession is that he is a clown)

The club was adorned with red, white and blue balloons, flowers and decorations everywhere. It was gorgeous. This year was extra special as there were carnival-like vendors all around. They had kettle corn, fried dough, a raw bar, ice cream trucks and activities and kiddie train rides for the young children. And of course...there was food. The BBQ had cold fried chicken, hamburgers, hot dogs, swordfish, salmon and the most incredible salads you could imagine. Once again-we ate till we couldn't eat any more then drank quite a bit too. Once the sun went down we were treated to an incredible fireworks display with music. It was spectacular. Once safely ensconced in bed after the day, I said a little prayer to God to thank him for all the gifts I experienced that day. I am truly blessed.

Saturday was cloudy-perfect day to hit the local shops. I said hello to some of my old friends who work in the stores then went back to the house where we had a HUGE Corn Hole tournament. Some friends came for the day and we partied like it was 1999. We planned a big BBQ of our own, and I was surprised that all the stores were open for business on July 4th. We must have gone to the liquor store and the supermarket at least 3 times that day. Again...it was the food. And so much of it I started to repeat the phrase, "Gluttony is one of the seven deadly sins." We laughed that this weekend was starting to be like reverse fat camp. That night we had a large bonfire on the beach and more fireworks from all along the coast could be seen from our spot on the beach. It just couldn't get any better.

Sunday was another beach day bonanza and a day of reflection on all the wonders we had experienced over the weekend. So many gifts, we had been given during the time spent together. We left to return home from our weekend truly fulfilled by a family's love and the blessings of a life spent enjoying it's spoils.

But we took with us memories that we will cherish forever-and for sure at least 5 unwanted pounds of good clean living.

Playing The Trump Card

Does anyone really think that The Donald has a chance in the presidential race? I gotta give the guy kudos though. He's got balls...He's for sure blunt, rough and no nonsense. The crap that comes out of his mouth is unbelievable but he says it like he thinks he sees it. And that's really the problem here-it's Donald's world and we just live in it according to him. Don't get me wrong-I like Trump. I think he's a likable character-and that's exactly what he is-a character.

But this time the stakes are high. Probably the highest he's ever had to endure and I'm not sure the world is ready for Donald to be in charge of us all. His recent comments about Mexico have illustrated that running the country is all together different than running a company. Like he can't just fire Greece-as much as he'd like to-and you certainly can't run a campaign that's based on bashing Mexico and a building a wall. You just can't fire Russia and the Middle East, that's not the way it works but I'm not sure Mr. Trump understands that.

What he will understand is the fallout of his thoughtless outbursts. NBC, Univision and now Macy's are all cutting ties with Trump. Do you think he's kicking himself for putting his foot in his mouth? I think not. I imagine Donald Trump loves being in the press regardless of whether it's for good or bad. A consummate showman, he probably believes he coined the phrase, "There is no such thing as bad publicity". But this isn't his boardroom anymore. This is a global boardroom and Trump doesn't get to make the rules. I doubt he would survive in an environment that he can't control completely.

I get why he's running though.

Trump thinks the world is based on "The Art of The Deal", and since he wrote the book, quite literally, his ego must lead him to conclude that he could be the Commander in Chief of the US simply because he never met a deal he couldn't manipulate to his advantage. At 69, Trump probably believes it's now or never and why not him? He's got the money, resources and time to make a run at it but that's about all it's going to be. A run-and at the rate he's going at today it's going to be over before it even started.

Yes Mr. Trump, this is the country of opportunity and if you want to run for President you have the freedom to do so! What you can't do is shoot your mouth off and make derogatory public statements about others without pissing off a nation. This time you aren't dealing with the likes of a Rosie O'Donnell that you can publicly shame and bully. It's not like you can tweet at Putin that he's a fat loser without becoming the biggest loser yourself.

This ain't no reality show, it's reality.

Light The Strobe Lighting

In today's beauty world the YouTube vloggers have made it a snap for us to up our makeup game. Applying your makeup daily has suddenly entered into an unprecedented realm of technique. Contouring is the one that comes to mind, and the art of applying dark creams and powders to the hollows of your face to produce face slimming, face shaping effects can result in giving the average person an incredibly sculpted look. Truth be told, contouring does take a bit of skill and a bit of product to get the right result which can sometimes means it's not for everyone.

Rest assured there's a new makeup trend that is taking the beauty industry by storm and it's easier than you think. Strobing, is "the new black" in makeup application and it gives you the same sort of sculpted look as contouring, but in a much softer and dewy-er way. 

Strobing is all about the highlighter-which means that it's main component is focused on ONE product which you probably already own already!

What is Strobing? It's all about light-think soft and bright. It's about applying highlighter-light and only light-to the parts of your face that the sun would normally illuminate. The look is a fresh faced, dewy result that says healthy in a "I just had an amazing facial" kind of way. It's similar to highlighting but there's a bit more to it than simple highlighting. The best part is anyone can get the look if you follow these easy steps:

Start with a moisturizer. Add a gorgeous luminizer like Kevyn Aucoin's  The Celestial Skin Liquid Lighting to your foundation.This should be the base to give your face that gorgeous dewy look. Avoid anything with a matte finish unless you are very oily. Then apply a highlighter to the areas of you face where sunlight would kiss; the tops of the cheek bones, temples, down the bridge of the nose, the brow bone and the forehead. If you have an oily skin, you may want to use a light hand, so as to not leave the skin looking greasy and shiny.

Cream highlighters like Smashbox's L.A. Light's Lip and Cheek Color Stick in Hollywood & Highlight or Kevyn Aucoin's The Creamy Glow Duo #4  work best to melt into your skin and create a dewy, strobing sensation! Champagne shades of highlighter are great for all skin tones, but if you are super fair, opt for a whiter, silvery looking highlighter like Hollywood & Highlight.

Jump start you summer with the hottest new makeup trend  that's sure to leave you selfie ready! Of course you will want the whole world to see your bright, lit from within glow that is gorgeous and easy. Then you will want to turn up the disco music and strobe lights so you can dance the night away!

The Pack Mentality

Those five men look like movie stars-don't they?
That's because they are. And it happened in the most incredible way. But that's only part of the story.

These brothers-6 in total (and 1 sister)-grew up in in a 16th floor Manhattan public housing apartment which served for 14 years as a prison for the family. Confined to the cramped apartment under their bizarre father's rule, the family of nine spent most of their lives with no contact with the outside world. The father forbade them to ever leave the apartment and held the only key to the front door. The children were home schooled by their mother, and taught never to communicate with strangers. Their only contact with real world were on necessary, supervised appointments or controlled outings to New York tourist destinations. The children were told to never cut their hair and that the outside world had "bad people in it".

The one privilege the boys father did allow was movies. And they indulged in many movies as their personal form of escape from the hell that they knew as their life. Middle brother Mukunda, was the prop master and he would make items from their favorite movies from things he had lying about the house. The boys would reenact scenes from the movies as a way to feel normal and feel free. Then in January 2010, Mukunda, then 15, decided he needed to escape and see life outside his prison walls.

Little did Mukunda know that that escape-he wore a mask he had made to resemble Mike Meyers from the Halloween movies so that he would not be recognized outside by his father-would change all of their lives for ever. Once outside, Mukunda didn't know his address so he kept the apartment building in his site as he visited a bank and a supermarket. People were afraid so he was soon stopped by police. When questioned Makunda says,

“They started asking, ‘Do you live here? Where are you from?’ And I was always taught to never interact with any people, so I didn’t say anything, you know. I didn’t give them any information on me,” Mukunda recalled.

He was placed on a psychiatric hold and sent to Bellevue Hospital for a week stay, which he loved. It was his first interaction with other people outside his family. When he returned home, his father was no longer in control. The boys then started going out together and on a chance meeting they met film maker Crystal Moselle, who they bonded with over their love of movies. Moselle ended up filming the boys for 5 years and the result is her documentary file "The Wolfpack", in theaters now. The film has bee critically acclaimed and won a Grand Jury prize at  this year's Sundance Film Festival.

Purely coincidence that one of the first people the boys meet is a film maker? I think not. These boys have a whole lot of catching up to do and they are doing it in grand style. Hollywood has come knocking and they ironically were, "ready for their closeup". But at an incredible price.