Jersey Chic

Is everyone from New Jersey ridiculous?

It seems like this is what the Reality TV world would like us to believe because the residents of that fine state just keep playing it up getting more and more redonk as time moves on. Case in point; The Cast of the Jersey Shore, MTV's latest reality series about a group of over tanned, over worked out, over accented 20 somethings who live together and "have their lives taped to see what happens."

Truth be told I have never seen one episode of this crapola, and yet I know who The Situation, Snookie and the rest of the gang are. Why? They are the punchline to a million and one jokes. And they are clueless-ly ridiculous. And they are all over every tabloid magazine, their every move scrutinized. And they are laughing all the way to the bank. I heard on the RADIO (see I can't even get away from them in the privacy of my own car) yesterday that they just wrapped up their Miami season, which is airing soon, for which they all received a $10 K raise per episode. Only to be asked to resume shooting immediately back in New Jersey at the shore for the third season.

What's funny is the cast is now holding out for more money per episode because they are rolling in it right now, being paid by night clubs that are standing in line wanting them to promote their clubs. They'll get their raise, too. Not too shabby for a group of Jersey townies whose claim to fame is GTL (gym, tanning, laundry).

Then there's these bitches...

The Real Housewives of New Jersey make being bad look good. Not really, but they are like the biggest train wreck that you can't stop watching. They are so bad that one of the housewives quit the show because she no longer wanted to be associated with the villian of the group. And who could forget the infamous table flip? I believe that will go down in Housewives/TV history. Danielle Staub, the housewife who is most hated, has turned gay? Only time will tell, as she breathlessly tells the cameras last night. Yet I can't wait to find out, as much as I hate myself for admitting that.

These ladies live in their own Jersey world and speak their own Jersey speak and each of them lives a charmed life. So they want us to believe. Table flipper Theresa is rumored to have filed Chapter 7 bankruptcy yet we all know she's making bank fighting Danielle for the cameras. I'm sure she's doing it for the well being of her family. Housewife Jacquline has been deleted from the Mother of the Year ballot, for throwing her 18 year-old daughter to the lions and not having her back.

"It's a very serious situation," Danielle says for the cameras. Ya think?

Jacquine's daughtery Ashley has been charged with assualt for pulling out a large portion of Danielle's hair at a country club fashion show turned brawl. She says she was protecting her mother, whom she thought was hit by Danielle. That same mother who brought her daughter to that fashion show and then kicked her out after the altercation telling her to "go home Ashley." Jaquline then waited by the crying victims car and I'm not sure why.

If that were me. I know for a fact my daughter would have been pinned to the ground by me until I got her into the car and drove her ass out of there. Then she would have never left the house again. I'm just saying...All that crazy play for the cameras is one thing but if my child gets involved all bets are off. What is wrong with these people?

Not all Jersey-ites are like these people. I know because one of my best friends, my college roommate hails from West Orange, NJ. She is the anti-Jersey compared to these bimbos. Educated, classy and articulate and intelligent. The only problem is you can never quite take the Jersey completely from the girl.

It always rears it's ugly head when she orders a simple CAAAWFEE, or coffee as it's known everywhere else in the world.